


The Green Eyed Turian

by Ishbella



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Humor, Interspecies Awkwardness, Interspecies Relationship(s), Interspecies Romance, Interspecies Sex, Romance, Romantic Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-24
Updated: 2018-01-31
Packaged: 2018-04-17 00:31:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 56,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4645722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ishbella/pseuds/Ishbella
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A romance between a Turian and a Human. </p><p>Nellwyn Greene is a newly retired alliance biotic on the Citadel who has a thing for men with green eyes. On a night out she meets a Turian who captures her attention with his emerald green eyes and soot black plating. How do you find someone again in a place like the Citadel?</p><p>Lazzus Tarrian is probably the most unsocial Turian on the Citadel, spending most of his time working on star ships but one night he meets a woman he regrets not taking the chance to get to know. Badly scarred and more than a little scared Lazz allows her to wrap herself around his heart.</p><p>After meeting again in an unlikely place they take a chance at inter-species romance and confront all the traditional hurdles of relationships. From insecurities, hesitant dates, meeting friends and family to finding themselves in love, together they learn that most things cross species just fine.</p><p>Told through POV</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Not So Quiet Night Off

The club Dark Star was large with the bar sitting in the middle of the space. A little brightly lit island surrounded by patrons chatting and drinking. The walls were the standard concrete that was everywhere in the Zakera ward, panels of light that reminded her of lava lamps the only wall decorations. Every corner of the vibrant club was lit with electric blue lighting. The music blared down from all around and here and there people of all races danced or sat in deep conversation.

 

Nellwyn looked around in admiration; it was a far cry from the dingy clubs she had visited on Earth or in various Human colonies. Dark Star was really nice but she did feel under dressed; her short tight dress was out of place against the long Asari style she saw on the other women. It was a shame none of her new work friends had been willing to come with her tonight but Nell saw this as an opportunity to meet new people and hopefully make some new friends. Being new to the Citadel was hard sometimes.

 

She could feel a few people look her way as she walked to the bar and sat on an empty stool. The bartender was a milk chocolate coloured Turian, his face lacking the familiar colony markings she saw on so many others. Briefly she wondered what that meant. Now that she lived on the Citadel it would probably be a good idea if she started to familiarise herself with other cultures to avoid offending anyone.

 

“What can I get for you, Human?” He asked politely, his mandibles tilting out in what she suspected was a smile. At least that’s what she hoped it was.

 

“What do you recommend?” Nell inquired. She had no idea about alien liquor. She could do tequila shots she supposed but trying something new couldn’t hurt. It was always good to try new things.

 

“A lot of Humans like the Thessian Sunset, even though they have no idea what it tastes like.” He chuckled to himself.

 

“I’ll try that. Thanks.” She smiled in return, pulling out her credit chit.

 

Nothing could have prepared her for her drink. It was electric purple that graduated into a shocking radioactive green. Suspiciously she took a sip, it was sweet. Hair curling sweet almost but she liked it.

 

“Like it?” he asked as he processed her chip.

 

“Yes, I love it.” Nell nodded, taking another gulp.

 

He gave her one last smile as he handed back her chit before turning to go and serve another patron who was calling for his service. Sipping her drink she turned in her seat and surveyed the dance floor. Grouped together people were dancing to the thumping music, some better than others.

 

“Hey honey, wanna dance?” A slurred voice asked from behind her making her jump. God damn, she had barely been here five minutes…

 

“No, thank you.” She answered tersely annoyed with being startled as she turned to look at the speaker. He was a man of average height with a mop of brown hair and he was drunk off his tits. The offending Human attempted to give her a seductive smile that was spoilt by his drunken swaying and sudden hiccup.

 

He frowned at her answer and grabbed her wrist, pulling her hard. Nell had to shift her centre of gravity to prevent being pulled from her bar stool. “Come on, it’ll be fun” he slurred in her face making her dry retch a little. His breath smelt like something had died in his mouth that or he had been drinking out of the toilets.

 

“No.” She growled, attempting to pull her wrist back. That was going to bruise, she thought annoyed. Nell was about five seconds away from biotically throwing his drunken ass across the room when a large black three fingered hand roughly grabbed the offending man’s wrist and twisted.

 

“The lady said no, you Human males don’t know when to back off.” A deep flanged voice growled menacingly. She looked up at the speaker, he was a black plated Turian and in the pulsing blue lighting he looked as menacing as his tone of voice. His emerald eyes were locked onto the Human male whose wrist he held in his gloved talons. If looks could kill…

 

If another Human male had said that there would have been a drunken brawl. However not many Humans were willing to fight an angry looking Turian who was well over 6ft tall, just like there weren’t many Humans who would fist fight a Krogan. The drunk Human attempted to pull his wrist from the three fingered grip and failed miserably. “I’m going all right!” he yelled in drunken frustration.

 

The Turian watched the man with a hawk like gaze as the man stumbled off, no doubt to go annoy someone else. Nell noticed this because she was watching the Turian. In the dim electric blue lighting of the club it was hard to see what colour his colony markings were but they looked green, a forest green opposed to the emerald green of his eyes. The mandible closest to her was missing a chunk from one of the tips and although hard to see she could barely make out the cracks and chips in his facial plates.

 

Poor guy, she thought. Those must have hurt; I wonder what happened to him? Not that it’s any of my business, she reminded herself distracted.

 

“Thank you. Can I buy you a drink?” She offered, pulling his attention towards her. When he turned those beautiful green eyes in her direction it felt like her breath got sucked out by a vacuum. Damn, he was pretty.

 

She knew he was going to refuse even before he said anything, she could see it in the way his mandibles flapped against his face uncomfortably and felt it in the way he stood ram rod straight. “No thank you. Have a good night, miss.” He said stiffly as he gave her a polite nod before walking away.

 

Nell watched him go feeling disappointed, she didn’t know why but she had been hoping he would stay and talk to her.

 

_______________________

 

Lazzus had just walked into Dark Star when he saw a Human male try and pull a Human female out of her seat. The woman had shifted her weight remaining immobile and although he didn’t know much about Humans despite working with them, it looked like she was rapidly running out of patience. Part of him was telling himself to mind his own business, that this Human could probably defend herself. The other part wanted to defend her, to protect the unknown female from the unwelcome male.

 

He crossed the floor in a few strides and gripped the man’s wrist, hard. Hard enough that the Human male released his grip on the female and turned to glare at him. “The lady said no, you Human males don’t know when to back off.” He snarled, his subvocals rumbling angrily in his chest.

 

The Human withered under his glare, he reeked of alcohol with a feint undertone of vomit. Disgusting. He attempted to rip his arm from Lazz’s vice like grip but failed miserably. “I’m going all right!” The male whined, struggling pitifully for a moment before Lazz released him with a light shove.

 

He watched the male storm off, like a child denied a toy. He could feel the female’s eyes burning a hole into his face, taking in every chip and crack in his facial plates. The scrutiny made him want to wince. If he looked at her she would shy away from him, frightened by his appearance. “Thank you. Can I buy you a drink?” He was caught off guard by the kindness and gratitude in her voice. More so by the offer, that was new.

 

He could feel his mandibles work against his face as he looked at her. She was pale, so pale her skin glowed blue in the ambient lighting. Black hair, darker than his plates and eyes the colour of the artificial sky he saw every day, or maybe that was the lights. For the first time in he didn’t know how long he was tempted to take her up on her offer, to have some company instead of his usual drinking alone in a crowded room but he knew how he looked. He didn’t want to make her uncomfortable.

 

“No thank you. Have a good night, miss.” He replied giving her a polite nod before he walked away. Hopefully this female would have her friends come and join her soon, so she would be safe.

 

He watched her out of the corner of his eye from another side of the bar as he ordered his drink. She was still watching him and it made him feel self-conscious. She would be able to see his broken fringe now, see the chipped off ends and the one half broken off spike. Maybe he should start wearing a cowl to hide it. Lazzus sighed heavily; he didn’t even know why it still bothered him. His fringe had been broken for years now. 

 

He downed his drink in one gulp and when he looked up she was watching the dancers again.

 

Lazz suddenly realised he had been watching her out of his peripheral vision for over an hour when she finally got up. He was stunned when she looked over towards him and gave a small wave before walking out of the club. Damn, that dress. Now that she was standing and walking away he could see what she had been wearing. It was a skin tight dress and was almost scandalous in how it hugged her small waist and shapely hips. Her legs were long and muscular, accentuated by her shoes that pushed her feet into nearly Turian and Quarian position.

 

He downed the drink in front of him in one swallow and shook his head. Great, now he was finding squishy Humans attractive…


	2. Serendipity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nell finds herself thinking about the green eyed Turian again but finding someone on purpose in a city is like finding a needle in a haystack. 
> 
> So when she randomly runs into him again she is not going to let the chance to get to know him slip away from her.

Nell found herself back in Dark Star nightclub the next Saturday night, sitting in the same stool and wondering what the hell she was doing. The pretty green eyed Turian had been in her thoughts all week and it was ridiculous. She wasn’t a teenager anymore to pine over someone she didn’t know, what the hell was wrong with her. Never the less here she was, against all common sense, impatiently waiting to see if he would show up again. This time she would ask him out to lunch or get his number at least.

 

Why she was so taken with a Turian she had only met for five seconds was beyond, Nell lamented silently as she tapped her foot in time with the music and drank her cocktail. Slowly, bored out of her mind an hour ticked by with no sign of him. She sighed and downed the rest of her drink, feeling decidedly disappointed. This had been a stupid idea…

 

________________

 

Two days later she was standing in a queue waiting for her morning caffeine fix, feeling blurry eyed and brain dead. A month was not enough time for her body to adjust to a civilian sleep cycle, despite not starting work till 0830 Citadel time Nell still woke at the crack of dawn and she often woke feeling more exhausted than she ever had in the military. It was probably the lack of mental stimulation.

 

Not really awake, she ordered her coffee and found a quiet table in the corner to sit at. The first week on the Citadel the early morning coffee choices had overloaded her brain. She had stared dumbly at the menu looking in horror at the five different milk choices, eight different syrups and twenty coffee styles. Now after a month she had her order memorized and more often than not ordered purely on autopilot. Still, it beat ship coffee. Then again everything beat ship coffee, crap had tasted like dirty black water and no amount of sugar had ever been able to improve it.

 

She was three sips into her mug of delicious caffeinated goodness when she noticed a sudden stillness in the café. All the normal expected conversations around her had died on the lips of the patrons, unease prickled over her skin like goosebumps and she looked around. Years of military service had her reaching for a handgun that was no longer on her hip as she scanned the store. Her eyes fell on a black Turian standing at the end of the line, the people in front of him shifted uncomfortably and she relaxed back into her chair. Semi-hushed whispers circulated the café like a small storm in a tea cup; some of them were really hurtful and made her angry on his behalf.

 

_“…Look at him…”_

_“…He looks like a merc…”_

_“…never find a mate with a fringe like that…”_

 

She watched him as he slowly moved up the line to be served, he kept his face straight ahead but every so often he rolled his shoulders clearly uncomfortable. Hell why wouldn’t he be? She was fairly sure now that this was the green eyed Turian she had met at the club briefly, after all how many Turians were missing half a fringe spike and had cracked plating. It had been difficult to see in the dim mood lighting of the nightclub but his plate damage was starkly visible under the florescent lighting of the café. Florescent lights flattered nobody.

 

Nell pulled her seat out and stood up as the waitress took his order with a friendly smile and a genuine greeting. It was obvious he was a regular here and it was nice to see one person in this café treat him like a person. Stupid strangers, she grumbled to herself as she walked over to him. She was not going to let this chance slip away from her this time, but first she would say something to those two nasty pieces of work.

 

“You two are being rude, so much for Asari diplomacy.” She paused to growl at the two Asari who had been the most vocal about his appearance on her way past. They had been sitting not more than two tables away from her, whispering and giggling like a pair school yard bullies loud enough for most people to hear. So his plates were a little cracked and chipped, even someone as sheltered as she was knew that Turians were militaristic and had mandatory service.

 

He turned abruptly at her words as she headed towards him without a look back at the two Asari behind her. His green eyes took her breath away, pure sparkling emerald and his colony markings were definitely forest green. A deep rich green that set off his black plating and ash grey hide. Damn, she had always been a sucker for green eyes. Those idiots clearly wouldn’t know a pretty Turian if he disembowelled them on his talons…   

___________________

 

Lazz had just ordered his coffee, doing his best to ignore the many whispers that always surrounded him. Spirits, all he wanted to do was get his morning tea and go to work. Sleep had been a hard to come by luxury this past week, his nights filled with the image of the woman from the club. If he had known he would regret it so badly he would have just let her buy him that damned drink.

 

“You two are being rude, so much for Asari diplomacy.” A very feminine voice from behind him growled. He spun shocked at being defended by a stranger and found himself face to face with the Human woman from last week. In all honesty even though he had spent the past week regretting not sharing a drink with her, Lazz had never expected to see her again. Or if he did, he expected her to either not remember him or shy away from him as so many others did.

 

Lazz shifted nervously when she smiled at him warmly and held her hand out in that strange Human gesture he could never get used to. What was it with Humans and physical contact and with strangers no less. “Hi. I don’t know if you remember me but you rescued me from a drunk at Dark Star last week. My name is Nellwyn Greene, nice to meet you.” She greeted him as pink bloomed across her pale face. Was she sick? She didn’t sound sick.

 

Not knowing what else to do but not wanting to be rude, he followed her lead. “Lazzus Tarrian. I remember you. It’s ah…nice to meet you too.” He fumbled reaching out awkwardly and shaking her hand. It was weird feeling five thin fingers in his three and her hand was so small compared to his. He felt so out of his depth as he released her hand.

 

“I was wondering if you would like to sit and have coffee with me, since you refused to allow me to buy you that drink.” The woman called Nellwyn smiled.

 

Lazz could barely believe what he heard; the same woman was asking him to have a drink with her for the second time. Was she just being polite? Was this some kind of Human obligation thing because he had helped her? Lazz made the mistake of looking around as he nervously pondered her motives and noticed most of the small café staring at them. Would she feel uncomfortable with all the unwanted attention? She was nice even if she was only being polite and he didn’t want her to be uncomfortable.

 

“Sorry. I have to go to work, I’ll be late soon.” He shrugged trying to keep his subvocals neutral, it was mostly true. There were cafés closer to the docking bay where he worked than this. He only came here because the staff were always nice to him here even though the other customers were sometimes hit and miss. He also liked their food and the way they brewed his tea.

 

He watched her smile fall and her shoulders sag with rising alarm. Spirits, she genuinely wanted his company. She looked disappointed and sad but it lasted only for a moment before she smiled at him again. “Can I get your Omni-tool contact details then?” She looked hopeful at least that’s how Lazz thought she looked, but at least she was smiling again.

 

Had he woken up in an alternate universe this morning? Lazz wondered silently.

 

“Sure.” He agreed not wanting to disappoint her again and feeling at a loss. He pulled up his Omni-tool and watched her do the same. When she bent her head to look at the flowing orange screen he could see shimmers of blue in her black hair. That was odd; did Human fringes normally shimmer blue? When their Tools pinged complete she met his eyes with her sparkling blue ones and grinned at him. Spirits…

 

“Thanks. I’ll message you later.” She told him warmly, looking pleased with herself as she stepping back on one foot to turn. “Don’t think you’re always going to get out of having a drink with me.” Nellwyn added teasingly over her shoulder before she went back to her table. There was a sway to her hips as she walked away that drew his gaze more than it should have.

_______________

 

He was so adorable, she thought as she watched Lazzus walk out of the shop with his morning drink. He had glanced nervously in her direction on his way out and she had felt her face warm as she waved to him. Nell felt a little bad for pushing him so much, he had clearly been uncomfortable and confused but she just couldn’t let him run off without trying.

 

Today was going to be a great day, she could feel it. She had actually found him, after that disappointing Saturday night in the club she had resigned herself to the fact that she was probably never going to see him again. Now she had his name and contact details, how lucky could one girl get.

 __________________

 

It was a slow day at the shop with customers occasionally trickling through the doors. Issana T’Lora the Asari manager of the exclusive boutique Nell had been fortunate enough to get a job at, had long gone into the back room to do her paperwork. The store sold women’s fashion and was one of the only places on Zakera ward that sold Human style clothing as well as the popular Asari style. It was an idea born from Issana’s obsession with Human fashion and Nell loved her job, very few people shot at her and she even got to wear all the styles she had practically drooled over while in the military.

 

After a few hours of sorting through stock, Nell pulled out her Omni-tool and decided to send Lazzus a message. That was a decent waiting time right? God she was nervous, Nell really didn’t want to scare him off by being too forward. She had already pushed him out of his comfort zone this morning just by pressing for his details but she worried that he would start to think that she wouldn’t contact him at all. She also had the feeling that he wouldn’t contact her first no matter how long she waited.

 

“Hi. How’s work going?” Nell sent as an opener. She stewed in her own worries for a few minutes, trying failingly not to wait for his reply. She was so lame.

 

“Good. You?” he replied after a few very long minutes.

 

“Yeah, good. Today is shaping up to be a slow day for the shop.” She messaged back, instantly regretting it the second she pushed the button. Ugh, it sounded like she was only talking to him because she was bored. “Means I have plenty of time to message you.” She added quickly hoping she hadn’t just made it sound worse. She was really out of her depth.

________________

 

She wasn’t going to message him, there was no way she was going to contact him. Was he supposed to contact her instead? He had no idea how this worked with Humans. Ugh, he couldn’t concentrate on his work at all.  

 

Lazz was waist deep in routine star ship maintenance for one of the Citadel’s patrol frigates when his Omni-tool chimed startling the shit out of him. Just what he needed…more cracks, he thought rubbing his forehead. Lazzus pulled himself out from under the ships drive core and pulled up his Omni-tool interface. Probably just Sam informing him that he was going on lunch or something equally pointless.

 

“Hi. How’s work going?” was the unexpected message from Nellwyn.

 

Lazzus stared at the message for a few minutes in shock, his mandibles working uncertainly against his face. She had contacted him… He squashed down the happy purr that erupted in his chest; he shouldn’t get ahead of himself. Surely she was just being polite. “Good. You?” he replied not sure of what else to say.

 

“Yeah, good. Today is shaping up to be a slow day for the shop.” Nellwyn instantly replied. Before he had time to think about the reply, never mind how to answer it his tool chimed again. “Means I have plenty of time to message you.”

 

Of course she was just messaging him because her work is slow. He knew he shouldn’t feel disappointed but he did. The tool on his arm chimed as another message appeared on the screen. “Sorry, that came out wrong. I’m glad it’s slow today so I have time to message you. I’ll shut up now. So what do you do?”

 

Oh, that’s what she meant. He felt guilty for misjudging her even for a moment, after all she had been nothing but kind to him. “I’m a star ship engineer. I help repair ships that come to the Citadel.” He explained feeling more relaxed than he had all day. She _wanted_ to talk to him, maybe it wasn’t just obligation.

 

“Oh, that’s cool. What are you repairing today?”

 

“Turian frigate drive core. Nothing serious just some routine adjustments.” Did she even know anything about ships? Humans didn’t have the same mandatory military service that Turians did.

 

“Sorry, I don’t know much about Star ships despite serving on one for 5 years. Do you enjoy your job?” Nellwyn replied answering his question. So she was ex-military like him. He considered asking her what her job had been on the ship but decided against it. He didn’t want to lead into any conversations that would end up with him being asked about his appearance.

 

“That’s ok, not many people do. Yeah, I love my job. What kind of ship did you serve on?” He asked before he thought better of it. Alliance vessels were so much different than Turian ones, the entire layout intrigued and confused him. Like Humans in general now that he thought about it.

 

“I served on the SSV Trafalgar until last month when I retired.” Oh, that was the frigate that had docked for a scheduled overhaul. It had taken them just under a week to complete all the repairs and upgrades.

 

“What do you do now? Do you have family on the Citadel?” Lazz asked curious. He wanted to know why this strange Human could choose to retire to the Citadel and not her home planet or one of the many colonies. Mostly he suspected he just wanted to get to know this strange Human who had smiled at him so genuinely and hadn’t seemed scared or put off by him.

 

“Nothing exciting, not like fixing ships anyway. I work in a little store on Zakera, we sell clothing and shoes. I love it actually. No my family all lives on Earth.” She was alone on the Citadel. Lazz understood how hard that could be; all his family lived on Palaven and the initial change to civilian life had been trying.

 

“Why did you choose the Citadel?” Damn why did he find her so fascinating… He waited a long tense minute for her to reply. Had he asked something he shouldn’t have? Had he offended her? Or did a customer just come into her store? He sat staring at the orange screen of him Omni-tool feeling like he had crossed a line before it finally pinged.

 

“More opportunities I suppose. You?” 

 

Oh. He had asked a really hard personal question and now it was thrown back at him. Spirits, he had no idea how to answer it. Wasn’t sure he even wanted to. “Same reason I suppose.” He ended up answering vaguely feeling uncomfortable.

 

“Hey I’ve got a group of girls just come in. I’ll contact you again in a little while.” She messaged after a few terse minutes of uncomfortable silence.

 

Damn, he hoped he hadn’t ruined whatever had been starting with his insensitive question. Conversation with her had been fairly easy up till that point, easier than any conversation had been in years. Maybe because it wasn’t face to face and he wasn’t worried about receiving scrutiny about his appearance.

 

He was surprised when she pinged him back an hour or so later just as he sat down at one of the docking bay restaurants for his lunch break, beginning their easy conversation again. This time however he was careful not to ask anything too personal or complicated.


	3. The Start of a Good Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nell and Lazz work out a new routine that works for both of them.

Nell was extra tired this morning and it felt like her eyes were hanging out of her head. She had spent yesterday messaging Lazz back and forth, talking about this, that and everything while trying to dodge asking any complicated questions. The more she had talked to him and learnt about him the more adorable she found him. In the end she had been too wound up and happy to sleep, instead lying awake while thinking about his green eyes. She was going to need a second cup of coffee just to function on a basic level.

 

She was sitting at the same table as yesterday, trying her best to sip her hot coffee like an adult when she heard the same hush from the day before fall over the store. Today the hush came and went like a cloud obscuring the sun, the patrons either still felt chastised after her outburst yesterday or the café was actually serving decent people today. Nell felt heat bloom in her cheeks when she looked up and saw Lazz standing in the line, still looking uncomfortable.

 

Time for that second cup of coffee she thought, as she chugged the remainder of her mug in a very unladylike fashion scalding her tongue. Lazz must have caught her movement out of the corner of his eye; he glanced at her for a second and before he did a double take, clearly caught off guard at seeing her here again. His mandibles began to flutter against his face like flustered bird wings as he watched her walk over. He looked so awkward it made her chuckle.

 

“Morning Lazz.” She smiled at him, feeling her cheeks heat in a blush as she came to stand beside him in the queue.

 

“Good morning, Nellwyn.” He answered nervously, fidgeting slightly. If she hadn’t been looking at him, Nell would never have noticed the feint spread of blue across the grey hide of his neck. Was that a Turian blush? She wondered feeling pleased that he was just as nervous as she was.

 

“It’s just Nell, Lazz. How are you this morning?” She asked, unsure of what else to say. Was it normal to be this nervous? She honestly couldn’t remember ever being this frazzled before, at least not since she had been a teenager with her first boyfriend.   

 

“Ah, good. You?” He replied uncertainly as they moved up the line.

 

“In need of a second cup of coffee.” She smirked up at him. Damn, he was so pretty it was unfair.

 

He rolled his shoulders, uncomfortable under her gaze and looked away. It wasn’t lost on her that Lazz deliberately looked away to the right so she couldn’t see his broken fringe spike. Unfortunately it exposed the missing chunk of his mandible. Poor guy couldn’t win, she thought sadly and feeling guilty for making him uncomfortable. She practically itched to make him feel better.

 

“Sorry for staring, your eyes are just such a beautiful colour.” She confessed feeling her face burn and hoping he wouldn’t think she was lying. She wasn’t surprised when he looked back at her, his brow plates rising in disbelief. She shrugged, resisting the urge to tell him how pretty she found him. “What can I say; I’m a sucker for a man with green eyes.”

 

He stared at her for a moment like she had grown a second head before clearing his throat. “So, why do you need a second cup of coffee?” He asked changing the subject.

 

“Woke up tired. Want to join me or are you going to be late for work?” Nell offered subtly calling him out on his bullshit from yesterday. This ship geek had probably never been late to work in his life and was probably always early. It would be nice if he felt comfortable enough to have coffee with her but if he didn’t yet, she wouldn’t push. Not today at least.

 

Lazz checked his Tool and appeared to mull it over before he cast a wide glance around the café. She followed his gaze and was pleased to see that most people were minding their own damned business, only a few were not so covertly glancing their way. She glared at them.  

 

“Sure, I’ve got a little time.” He conceded making her heart flutter.

_________________

 

Lazz had still been early for work despite being fifteen minutes later than he usually was; the sudden change to his routine had been nerve wracking. He had spent the whole time nervously checking his Tool while trying to hold a conversation. At first she had simply cocked an eyebrow at him, a tiny smile tugging at her soft lips which later turned into an indelicate snort and then finally into fits of giggling followed by hasty apologies for laughing at him. At least she had been amused rather than insulted. It wasn’t like he hadn’t enjoyed her company even if he had been nervous as hell and self-conscious about his appearance. He had gathered up his nerve and told her so as he bid her goodbye.

 

She had quickly flustered him again; she had gone bright red in the face. For a moment he had worried that he had upset her somehow, been a mere heartbeat away from apologising when she had smiled and asked if they could do coffee again tomorrow morning. He had been reduced to nodding dumbstruck as he struggled to control his subvocals enough that he could say goodbye without embarrassing himself.

 

Maybe he should ask Sam what it meant when Humans went red in the face. Lazz wasn’t sure he wanted the scrutiny and the questions about her yet, or about what they were. Whatever they were, a day was hardly enough time to figure anything out. Except that he was intrigued, flustered and attracted to her. If Nell were a Turian he would know if she was interested in being courted by him, but she wasn’t, she was Human so he had no idea what she wanted. Damn species that didn’t have subvocal mating cues he could follow.

 

She could do better anyway. Surely she was attractive by Human standards… Nice small waist, her fringe that shimmered blue under light and those eyes… Turian’s didn’t have eyes the colour of the Citadel sky and he found himself mesmerised by the way they sparkled when she laughed or frosted over when she glared.

 

Lazz shook his head in an attempt to clear his thoughts as he headed to the frigate he was still working on. At least ships were easy, they didn’t make him nervous or insecure and he always knew exactly what they needed. They also didn’t give a damn about his broken fringe. Females were complicated, complicated in ways he hadn’t had to deal with in ages.

 

“Hey buddy. Bad morning?” Sam asked as he walked through the CIC of the ship. Sam was in the middle of tweaking the ships navigation device.

 

Sam Nelson was one of the few people Lazz considered a friend. The man was quite a bit shorter than he was with what could only be described as a messy mop of brown hair. Lazz had commented about it once and Sam had made high drama of how Turian’s would never understand how hard it was to style bed hair. The fact that some Human males purposely made their hair look like that had made Lazz laugh. They were very strange. Sam was also covered in the things he called freckles; they were all across his nose and arms. Briefly he wondered why Nell didn’t have any.

 

“No, it was good. Just have a lot on my mind.” Lazz replied shaking his head.

 

“Good huh? Is that why you’re fifteen minutes later than normal.” Sam drawled, smirking in that obnoxious way of his.

 

Ugh, he was going to regret this. “What does it mean when a Human female’s face turns red?” He asked trying not to wince. Sam’s reaction was instant. His brown eyes went wide in shock, and his mouth hung open wordlessly. Somehow it was far less endearing when Sam did it.

 

“It can mean a few different things: embarrassment, anger or romantic stimulation. Why what did you do?” Sam explained sounding suspicious.

 

All that? Human faces changed colour for all those reasons? He had blushed when she had first approached and greeted him, more nerves than anything else. Were Humans the same? So now the question what reason does she change colour for? “There were a few times, today and yesterday. Her face went bright red when I said I enjoyed having coffee with her.”

 

“Wait. You were having coffee with a female? You? The most unsociable Turian on the Citadel?” Sam scoffed sounding shocked. It was interesting that he hadn’t questioned the fact that Nell was Human. Anyway, he was in drama mode now and it was embarrassing.

 

“She asked, I couldn’t say no without being rude.” Lazz lied trying to down play it. He wasn’t going to tell Sam that today was the third time she had asked him to have a drink with her or that he had been messaging her all day yesterday. Well at least not if he could avoid it.

 

Sam walked away around Lazz like a Varren waiting to pounce. It was hard not to fidget self-consciously under his gaze like he always did when someone stared at him. “Uhuh, without being rude huh? I don’t see any new cracks so it’s not like she twisted your arm over it.”

 

He was being called out on his lie. Curse the Spirits that had made Turian’s terrible liars. “Fine. She’s asked me three times now.” A barrage of questions looked to pass over Sam’s face as he made the most comical choking noise.

 

“What’s she like?” He decided to ask first after a few moments of struggle. Well at least that was an easy question.

 

“Nice, I guess.” That was the understatement of the cycle Lazzus, well done.

 

“Nice? That’s all. Ugh, you suck at this you know that right? Fine. Where does she work?” Sam lamented clearly wanting more.

 

“Female clothing store on Zakera.” Lazz answered feeling uncomfortable. He really didn’t want to be talking about her to another male, even if that male was Sam and Human. Would she be angry? Or was this just something Human’s did.

 

“And you like her?” Sam asked oblivious to his internal struggle.

 

Did he? Lazz thought about it for a moment. Thought about the way his heart rate sped up and the rumble that would erupt in his chest. “Yes. Now will you just tell me why she goes red in the face? If I’m embarrassing her or making her angry I need to apologise.”

 

“Well good news buddy, it sounds like she likes you too. It’s why she blushes.” Sam laughed in the face of his outburst and declaration.

 

Spirits… She liked him back. Well, maybe. Could it even work a Turian and a Human? Could she ever find him attractive, despite all the damage to his appearance? _“Sorry for staring, your eyes are just such a beautiful colour”_ She had told him smiling. He had shrugged it off, not believing her but what if she really thought that?

 

His Omni-tool pinged on his wrist making his heart hammer. Ignoring the knowing look on his friend’s face Lazz opened it as he walked away. “See you later.” He gestured distractedly.

 

“Tell her I said hi.” Sam called obnoxiously from behind him. The message was from her, a short story about a customer she had just served. Geez her store had only been open for less than ten minutes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was originally going to be a huge ass chapter but i've decided to split it. It just didn't flow right and got all confusing. So sorry it's short


	4. Worrying too Much

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nell has something she's afraid to tell Lazz but she's not as subtle as she thought.

Lazz had been so nervous about purposely meeting her for coffee the next morning that he had trouble sleeping. Today he was going to try not to check his Tool so much; maybe setting an alarm would help. He saw her this time as he approached; she was sitting at the back corner table near the store front window staring down at her coffee like it was confusing her. She didn’t appear to be in a good mood this morning and he wondered, feeling disappointed, if she still wanted to do this.

 

When she heard the familiar hush that followed him everywhere, she looked up and met his gaze as he walked over to her. A smile, so at odds with her pervious expression lit her face and made his heart hammer.

 

“Morning. You haven’t got your drink yet?” Nell asked a confused little frown clouding her face.

 

“I, ah, wanted to say hello first.” He fumbled nervously wondering if he should ask about her previous expression.

 

“Get your tea and then come and sit with me.” She scoffed at him making small shooing gestures with a teasing smirk.

 

A few times as he waited in the line to be served he glanced over and saw her smiling at him softly, other times she was staring at her coffee looking troubled. Should he ask? He should ask…

 

“Are you all right?” He asked as he put his tea on the table before pulling out the chair.

 

“Of course.” She sounded shocked. Damn, he wished he could tell if she was lying.

 

“You, ah, seem distracted.” He didn’t add anymore to that sentence as he pushed her, didn’t add _‘do you not want to do this?’_ to the end.

 

He watched her consider her answer. “Just tired. So… are you going to spend the whole morning checking the time?” She deflected. For a moment he considered pushing her but she either wasn’t ready to tell him or it wasn’t anything important. Maybe she _was_ just tired.

 

“I set an alarm.” He admitted deciding to let it go.

 

She chuckled softly as she took another slip of the light brown drink she called coffee. “Still working on the drive core?” She asked. He always got the feeling when she asked about his work that she was genuinely interested, yesterday her eyes hadn’t glazed over as he spoke. She had asked questions, for clarification, tried her best to understand and learn about his work.

 

Time with Nell passed quickly and all too soon his tool was beeping at him. He could get used to this, quietly spending his mornings with someone else. Hopefully his heart would stop hammering in his chest and he would learn to stop worrying about whether or not she was staring at his plating when he wasn’t looking.

 

Nell got up with him, gathering up their cups and walking them over to the service counter. He tried not to stare but his eyes skimmed down to her waist, admiring the way it smoothly curved in. The line of a Human’s waist wasn’t as extreme as a Turian’s or even a Quarian’s but hers was attractive as hell to him. He should stop staring before she noticed…

 

_____________________

 

Nellwyn had been standing in front of the dressing room mirror for about fifteen minutes now, frowning at her reflection. Her reflection frowned back, equally frustrated. She was supposed to leave in ten minutes to go and surprise Lazz for lunch but now that it was nearly time to go she was unsure of her appearance. Did she look ok? Should she change?

 

During the week of sharing their morning coffee together, Nell had noticed the way his eyes sometimes lingered on her waist. At first she had thought he had been looking at her ass or her hips but a quick extranet search had told her that it was her waist. So now she was standing in front of a mirror worrying about if what she was wearing flattered her waist.

 

She had decided on a pair of high waisted black cigarette trousers that were a bitch to get on and off, thank god for the ankle zips, paired with a rockabilly mesh top in navy blue and shiny black heels. It looked cute in her opinion but would a Turian think so… or should she wear one of the new in high waisted pleather mini-skirts…

 

“Hey Issana. I need your opinion for a sec.” She called out across the empty store finally annoyed enough to ask for help.

 

Her small Asari manager came in from where she had been working in the back room. “I thought you had left already. Didn’t I give you the afternoon off?” She smirked slyly.

 

“Do I look all right?” Nell huffed out, ignoring the teasing smile. She never thought there would come a day when she gave two shits about someone’s opinion on her appearance.

 

“Of course, why? Planning on meeting a man for lunch?” Issana teased, her smile turning impish.

 

“Turian actually. Should I change? Does my waist look all right?” Nell fretted as she turned in the mirror. Her waist looked the same as it always did in her opinion and that was annoying.

 

Issana burst into a musical lilting laugh that had Nell glaring at her though her reflection. Now she was just being mean… “You look great, Nell. He’d have to be blind not to appreciate you in those pants. I think every Turian on the Citadel is going to appreciate your waist.” The petite lavender Asari reassured her.

 

“Now go on. Go to lunch and give me all the details tomorrow.” Issana added, turning her away from the mirror and pushing her towards the big glass doors with a laugh.

 

Ten minutes later Nell stood in the middle of the busy docking bay, wondering what to do. It occurred to her now, that she had no idea what ship he was working on. Should she ask him the name of the ship he was on or should she ask information where she could find him? Would they even know? Part of her didn’t want to give up the chance to see him flustered and spoil the surprise. Her more sensible part was having second thoughts about this plan; maybe it was too soon, too soon to tell him what was bothering her because he was starting to notice and too soon to suddenly drop lunch on him.

 

She looked at the information desk. A dark brown Turian with creamy white colony markings stood behind the tall counter, patiently talking to a short man in standard issue Alliance armour. Nell sighed in annoyance at her own stupidity and joined the queue. The longer she didn’t tell him the worse she felt and the more she couldn’t sleep. She needed to get it over with.

______________

 

Lazz was busy upgrading the frigate’s targeting system with the latest coding, completely oblivious to everything but the sporadic chiming of his Omni-tool. He felt that everything was going well with Nell so far, nice and slow. He was beginning to adjust and it was good to not feel so out of his depth all the time. Morning coffee together was becoming a regular ritual he looked forward to, as well as the constant daily messages and stories of things they found interesting. It was nice… well except for that thing that was bothering her…

 

“Dude, you didn’t tell me your girlfriend was hot.” Sam exclaimed as he unexpectedly barged into the room where Lazz was working, the doors swishing open and closed quietly. Lazz spun around in his spot and came face to face with his Human friend who had a huge stupid grin plastered to his face.

 

“Who’s hot?” Lazz asked confused, sometimes he still didn’t understand half the words that came out of Sam’s mouth. It probably didn’t help that Sam had just walked in beginning a conversation that sounded like it had started ten minutes ago and he was the last to know. Damn Humans and their tendency to start a conversation half way though.

 

“Your girlfriend… the one you were telling me about. Nellwyn…Black hair, blue eyes… damn man she’s hot.” Sam said cocking an eyebrow and talking slower. Nellwyn… had he told Sam her name, he couldn’t remember if he had. Despite Sam’s best efforts Lazz had given him as little information about Nell as possible.

 

“Why do you know what Nell looks like? And how do you know her name, I’m pretty sure I never told you.” Lazz asked ignoring the low rumbling growl trying to escape his chest. Sam was just teasing him; he knew that but Spirits if his instincts weren’t telling him to drive off this rival male.

 

“She’s outside waiting for you.” He laughed finally making sense.

 

Wait, she was here? Outside? Was something wrong? But Sam would have told him straight up if something was wrong. Wouldn’t he? Was it about that thing or did she just come to see him?

 

“Spirits Sam. Say that first.” He sighed trying to calm his nerves. Hopefully this was a good thing, Lazz prayed to the Spirits as he walked out the door closely followed by Sam.

__________________

 

She turned at the sound of Sam’s voice to see her ruffled and harried Turian walk out of the frigate’s doors, she had missed what he said but he stood leaning against the door smirking, obviously having some fun at Lazz’s expense. He was sweet but oh boy could that man talk. Sam had peppered her with a million questions the second he heard she had been looking for his friend, but he had been showing her the way and promising to get him so she had cautiously answered them.

 

Nell smiled at him and saw some of the tension ease from his shoulders as he walked down the ramp, giving his friend a distracted wave. “Hey.” She greeted him lamely, her nerves taking over. She could feel the blush burn through her face. Did she look ok? Did he hate that she had just shown up?

 

“Hey.” He returned suspiciously. His mandibles fluttering uncertainly against his face the way they did when he wasn’t sure what to expect. “Is there, ah, something wrong?”

 

“No, I have the afternoon off and wanted to see if you would have lunch with me.” She explained trying not to sound too eager. It was hard since he was looking so adorable.

 

“I wish you’d warned me you were coming. I would have met you at one of the restaurants outside.” He sighed making her laugh.

 

“Lazz, that would have ruined the surprise besides it was a kind of spur of the moment decision.” Nell smirked at him as she slipped her hand into his. He stared at it, at her five fingers threaded through his three and she wondered for a moment if he was going to shake it off. When his emerald eyes met hers they were very warm, his mandibles flicked wide in what she suspected was a goofy grin. There was a deep rumble in his chest that made him sound like an oversized cat.

 

She wondered if it would be pushing too far if she kissed him? Did Turian’s even kiss? By Human dating standards kissing him right now would be perfectly normal… but she knew without him saying anything that he wanted this to go slow.

 

Lazz broke the heavy silence. “I hope Sam didn’t talk your ear off?” he chuckled unsurely in an attempt to lighten the mood. She had missed her chance; it was probably just as well. Nell was still disappointed but it wasn’t like they didn’t have time. Neither of them were going off station for an extended time to be shot at, they were civilians now, well if he still wanted to see her after today that is.

 

“Both my ears.” She giggled as she pulled him forwards. His lunch break would be over before they knew it as it was and she wanted him to eat first, before she dropped her bomb shell on him.

 

Nell felt the smile slip from her face as they walked towards the main docking bay. God it made her nervous, it was beginning to hang over her head like an axe at night but as soon as she saw him she forgot about it. She told herself every morning that she would tell him and then she chickened out. She liked him far too much for only being with him barely a week. He was just so damned cute and Nell didn’t want to ruin what was starting but he deserved to know.

 

“It’s not just lunch is it?” Lazz asked his deep flanged voice trilled sadly, stopping in his tracks. Ugh, now look what you’ve done. You’ve worried him.

 

“Not quite. I wanted to tell you this morning, every morning actually but I’m a coward.” She confessed looking down at their hands still linked together. Damn, she had meant to do this after lunch. It was hard not to look up and lose herself in his sparkling green eyes and deflect this conversation again. “I’m a biotic. It’s stupid but I’ve been worried about telling you because neither Human nor Turian cultures really trust biotics.”   

 

The hand not holding hers came up and tilted her chin to force her to look at him, the warmth she saw in his eyes made her breath catch in her chest. “What chip model?” He asked quietly as his thumb gently stroked her chin. He wasn’t worried that she was a biotic, just that she was an L2. Somehow the conversation in her head had never gone like this; his reaction had gotten worse for every day she had put it off.

 

“Don’t worry, I’m an L3.” She reassured him with a slight smile and felt him sigh. All the tension she had caused rushed out of him in a single sentence. “You’re not upset I’m a biotic?” She asked feeling that she needed to hear him say it.

 

He chuckled, a deep rumbling in his chest as his large hand cupped her jaw. “If I was worried about biotics I would be living on Palaven. Every single Asari is biotic, surely they told you that.” He waited until she nodded against his hand before continuing. "Thank you for telling me, Nell.”

 

Geez, he wasn’t even angry she hadn’t told him straight off. There had been no yelling, no anger, no accusing her of being able to influence his brain…

 

He was not getting away without a little kiss this time. Nell reached up took a tiny step forwards and before he could react planted a gentle kiss on his mandible, just above the break. At least with her heels on she hadn’t had to stand on her tip toes to reach him properly. That flustered him, she thought smiling as she stepped back. His neck was looking a little blue.

 

“Come on. Let’s get lunch.” She laughed at him, tugging on his hand. If she’d known he would react like this she’d have told him on their first coffee date. Her steps felt a hundred times lighter…

__________________

 

There were two restaurants that served both levo and dextro in the docking bay. Lazz had no idea what their levo was like so he picked the one with his favourite dextro lunch. By the time they had arrived Nell was fully back to her normal cheerful self and his blushing had stopped.

 

Spirits, she had confided to him. For a very frightening moment Lazz had been sure she had been about to leave him, the smile had slipped off her face and her brows had furrowed. His first thought had been, _‘well this is it she’s leaving’_. So when she had said she was a biotic the only thing that had popped into his mind was the fear of her being an L2 and being in pain.

 

Whoever had made her ashamed of being how she was born had better pray Lazz never found them…

 

Then of course she had turned him back into a flustered wreck again by kissing him. He knew what that was; he had lived on the Citadel for three years. He was a little disappointed she hadn’t kissed him on the mouth-plates like he saw Human or Asari lovers do all the time but then he’d have been even more of a mess. He appreciated that she was letting him adjust mostly in his own time.

 

_“… Look at him…”_

_“...Makes my fringe hurt just looking at him…”_

_“He’s a mess…”_

_“What’s he doing with a babe like her…?”_

 

He was used to this but he hated that she got subjected to it by proximity, hated to think that she might become uncomfortable. He looked at Nellwyn standing beside him anxiously, her posture had gone stiff and she was glaring icily around the restaurant. She was becoming angry and he gave her hand a light squeeze.

 

For once however a whisper was right, he had no idea how he had gotten so lucky. In his opinion she always looked good, even the first time he had met her and he hadn’t known her at all. Today though, in those pants that showed off her trim waist and flared hips… Spirits his mandibles had dropped. Sam had been right, she was hot as Human’s put it. He still had no idea why she had picked him.

 

Shoulders back and with a last cold glare around the room, Nell lead him by the hand over to the counter. She looked him in the eye as they joined the queue; the look just dared him to make an apology. Yeah… he wasn’t going to step on that landmine again…

 

“So any idea what you want?” He asked changing the subject and trying to distract her.

 

“Some of those sandwiches look good.” She replied pointing to the levo display. Everything in that cabinet looked gross to him; levo food always looked and smelt disgusting. “You?” She turned to ask, looking up at him.

 

It still made him uncomfortable when she looked up at him from the side. She never asked about it and never stared at it but he knew one day he was going to have to tell her. Tell her how it happened and what a broken fringe meant in Turian culture. Not today, he wasn’t ready but soon. He squeezed her hand and turned to look down at her. “Just my usual steak sandwich.”

 

“Do we have time to sit and eat here or should we walk back and eat there?” She queried letting go of his hand and pulling up her Omni-tool to look at the time.

 

“We can sit if we’re quick or we can walk back and I’ll show you around the ship.” He didn’t really mind which happened. Part of him was already hoping that lunch would become a regular thing too, though it would probably mean changing to somewhere that was more in the middle of their two work places. It wasn’t fair for her to come all the way down here to have lunch with him all the time.

 

“Oh, I’d like that. I’ve never been inside a Turian frigate before.” She grinned making his heart flop.

 

If there was one thing Nell couldn’t do, Lazz chuckled to himself silently so as to not incur her wrath, and it was eating and walking at the same time. She had white sauce all around her mouth and a little on her cheek, to make it even more funny she had almost walked into three people.

 

“So is that a biotic eating habit or a Nell eating habit?” He smirked as he watched her trying to wipe her face. He felt his neck go blue when he took the napkin off her and wiped the spot she missed on her cheek.

 

She glared at him for a moment, her cheeks bright pink and one lip sticking out before smirking at him. She was doing that thing Sam did where he pretended to be offended. “You’re lucky you’re cute or I’d kick your ass.” She laughed teasingly.

 

Wait, wasn’t cute similar to hot in the strange Human slang vocabulary. At least when directed at a person. Lazz was pretty sure the other meaning was used in reference to small children or stuffed animals. She had to be just teasing him. There was no way she would find him as attractive as he found her and he was pretty sure Turian’s couldn’t be considered cute in the other sense.

 

“Come on. I’ll show you the ship now that your face is clean.” He stammered shaking his head.

 

“Meany.” She laughed at him, threading her fingers though his again. Lazz liked to think that this time he handled it with a bit more decorum, that his subvocals didn’t go quite so crazy. He could get used to holding her small hand in his big one. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the other portion of the big ass chapter i had going.


	5. Traditional Human-Style Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lazz asks Nell out on a date for the first time.

Lazz couldn’t help but notice that in the two days since she had told him she was a biotic, things with Nell had improved. She was no longer holding anything back from him, no longer wore that little troubled frown when she thought he wasn’t watching. Yesterday when he met her for their morning coffee he had found her reading something on her Omni-tool instead of glaring at her coffee and her first smile had been more genuine. She had even pressed another small kiss into his mandible as she told him to have a good day at work.

 

He should have pushed the issue sooner but he had been too worried about driving her away, Lazz admitted to himself as he caught sight of her waiting for him at their now usual table. One of these days his heart would stop thudding like a Krogan war drum every time he saw her...

 

She looked up from her Omni-tool at the hush that followed him everywhere and smiled in the way that made his subvocals purr. By the time he had ordered and collected his tea Nell had finished whatever it was she had been doing on her Omni-tool, a few times he had glanced over to see her wearing an expression of amusement and other times of mild horror.

 

“So what’s on for today at your store?” He asked putting his tea down and joining her at the table. Fashion was no more his forte than the specifics of drive cores were hers but he tried. It wasn’t as if he didn’t appreciate the way clothing looked on her or the way her eyes sparkled when she talked about something she so clearly loved.

 

“The collection from that Asari designer I was telling you about is coming in today.” Nell groaned out with a wince before taking a sip of her coffee.

 

“You mean the one that merged Asari and Human styles together?” He asked trying to remember which one she had been telling him about. If it was the one he was thinking of she was not going to have a good day today.

 

“I seriously don’t know what Issana was thinking when she ordered those abominations. We’re not going to be able to sell them to our Human customers.” She grumbled her nose scrunched up in distaste. She hated that collection with a passion and had already told him so in _great_ detail. In fact he was pretty sure exact her words had been _‘over my dead body’_ when he had foolishly asked if she was going to have wear them for work.

 

Personally Lazz had no idea what was so wrong with those dresses she had shown him pictures of. While not as flattering as some of the outfits he had seen Nell wear, they hadn’t looked awful to him. They were short, by Asari standard, coming to just above the knee and fitted across the waist and hips. Similar to the dress she had worn at the club the night he first met her. It had been a mistake to point that out, her glare could have frozen a sun Lazz remembered with a wince.

 

“Maybe the Asari will like them.” He suggested hesitantly trying to be supportive and cheer her up.

 

“I hope so; otherwise they’re going to stay in the store until I get sick of seeing them and set them on fire.” Nell frowned with a resigned sigh.

 

“So, ah, what were you reading?” Lazz asked changing the subject as he gestured to her Omni-tool. Judging by her earlier expressions while he had been standing in the cue, Nell had not been reading anything about the topic he wanted to distract her from.

 

“Oh that. I was watching a few new movie trailers. Some director got it into his head to remake a couple of the really old Earth classics. Two of them just came out in Cinemas today.” She laughed at the sudden change of topic.

 

“Oh, what ones?” He smirked back taking another sip of his tea. This topic should be safe, or at least safer than discussing clothing she hated and already wanted to burn.     

 

“One is Rambo, I have no idea why anyone would remake that or how that could even possibly work.” Nell explained shaking her head. He would have to look up the original to understand why she thought it couldn’t work; maybe she would even be interested in watching the original with him. Old Human movies were weird. At least the few he had watched with Sam had been weird, terrible graphics and cheesy lines he sometimes didn’t understand.

 

“What’s the other?” Lazz asked dragging his thoughts away from old Earth movies. He hadn’t brought a female into his personal space since before he had retired and as much as he liked Nell he knew he wasn’t ready for that. Not yet.

 

“James Bond. The lead actor is a Turian, so I’m curious to see how they’ll pull it off and from what the trailer showed the special effects look kind of awesome.” Nell told him sounding both amused and sceptical. It sounded like she was actually interested in this one, unlike the Rambo remake.

 

“Would you like to go see it?” He blurted out without thinking. His question was greeted by a stunned silence. Her blue eyes had gone wide and her very pink mouth was hanging open. Spirits, had he misread? Did she not want to see that movie? Did he do something wrong by asking? He felt his subvocals let out a distressed trill he was certain every Turian in the store could hear before he clamped it off.

 

“Err, if you don’t…” He began to stutter out unhappily before he felt her soft hand cover his on the table. A brilliant smile lit her face and her cheeks went as pink as her lips.

 

“I would love to see it with you. When?” She cut him off before he could finish backing out of his invitation. Spirits, she wanted to go with him. He had just caught her off guard. When would be a good time? He wondered. Tonight maybe, if she was ok with it.

 

“Tonight?” he suggested, trying not to trip over his subvocals. Maybe it would give her something to look forward to after dealing with that collection she hated so much. When she nodded he pulled up his Omni-tool to check the movie times. Unfortunately there were only late night sessions, which meant if she still wanted to go they wouldn’t be having dinner together.

 

“There are only late night sessions on tonight: 20:00, 21:00 and 22:00 at the cinema on Zakera. The Presidium cinema is running the same times. So we could see the 20:00 screening on the Presidium if you like?” He continued after a moment of consideration.  

 

“Sounds great. I’ll see you there at 19.30?” Nell agreed just as his Tool chimed with the alarm he always had set to remind him to go to work. Sam would have called this _‘saved by the bell’_ , Lazz thought as Nell stood to begin gathering up their coffee cups.

 

“Yeah.” He nodded hurriedly when he realised he hadn’t answered her. The first time he had asked her out and she had said yes. Today was going to be a very long day, he thought feeling excited as he watched her take their things to the counter.

__________________

 

Nell was beginning to suspect she was really vain, or that she was becoming vain. Either way she was once again standing in front of a mirror trying to decide if she looked ok and once again, she thought she did but was unable to escape the tiny niggle of doubt that something else she owned would look better. Somehow dating had been easier when both parties’ entire wardrobe choices had consisted of Alliance fatigues or armour. Less fun but definitely easier.

 

They were just going to a movie together; it wasn’t like she was dressing for an Alliance ball. In which case she would be in dress blues and _still_ not have to worry. There was something to be said about having too much choice and right now that was a long string of curses.

 

This was ridiculous, she looked fine. Nell ripped her eyes away from her reflection in the bathroom mirror and walked back into her small bedroom. As she put on her heels she looked around the room, luckily it was still neat because the longer she stayed here the more likely it was that she would start obsessing over her appearance again. She needed to leave.

________________

 

Nell was sitting in the lounge of the Presidium cinema complex, sipping a cup of tea and trying not to feel overly excited. This was going to be their first date outside of his work hours and to make it even more exciting the first one he had invited her to. Not that she ever had a problem with the fact that their relationship was initially initiated by her, in fact that was one of the things she found adorable about Lazz but it was nice to be invited out.

 

It had been unfair of her but she had honestly expected him to cut things off between them after she told him she was a biotic. She just wasn’t used to people outside of the Alliance reacting well to the news. On the few occasions she had tried to date outside the military it had always ended badly, either at the beginning because of her biotics or later because of her service tours. People were always suspicious of those who were different. Probably hadn’t helped that she had worked herself up over the issue by delaying it. It was just that she really liked Lazz and hadn’t wanted to spoil what was between them.

 

Nell checked the time on her Omni-tool; he should be here in another ten minutes. Tonight would be the second time she had seen him out of his work uniform and there was something extra thrilling about that. He was so handsome but the red of his engineer uniform really did nothing for him, except maybe make him look like a Christmas tree. It clashed so badly with his eyes and colony markings. It would be nice to see how he looked in Turian casual clothing.

 

“Hey love. What’s a beautiful girl like you doing going to see a movie by herself?” A human male voice asked, snapping her attention away from what Lazz would look like out of uniform. Oh, for the love of… she grumbled to herself as she watched the speaker approach. He was a tall red head who looked like he had an attitude problem.

 

“I’m not here alone. I’m waiting for my date.” Nell growled out, trying and possibly failing to be polite. If there was one thing she absolutely hated it was being approached in such an unwelcome manner. Well, that and being called _‘love’_ by a stranger.

 

“Maybe he wouldn’t have stood you up if you smiled more.” The obnoxious man chuckled to his friend beside him like he was being hilarious.

 

“Maybe you’d get more dates if you weren’t such an ass.” Nell snarled leaning back in her chair. If they so much as took another step towards her she was going to hit them with singularity. There was no way this moron would be this rude to an Asari or to her if she had been wearing her Alliance blues. The red head’s face went from laughing to angry at light speed.  

 

“Is there a reason you’re harassing my girlfriend?” Lazz’s flanged voice growled from her three. Keeping her attention focused on the men in front of her she spared a split second glance at Lazz as he came up to stand at her side. She could hear the angry rumble of his subvocals.

 

“Well? You haven’t answered me Human.” Lazz snarled again once he was firmly placed at her side. He was such a sweetie but when he wanted to look menacing he barely had to try.

 

“She looked like she wanted company.” The man stuttered nervously. He wasn’t having fun anymore and his Adam’s apple was bobbing like mad. The angry look had all but bled out of him. It was funny how the snide laugher had dried up as well; one lone woman enjoying a cup of tea, no problems but add a pissed off Turian and all that backbone turned to jelly. His friend had already taken half a step backwards.

 

“Then why is she five seconds from biotically introducing you to the ceiling?” Lazzus asked crossing his arms and not buying what they were selling. They had no answer to that, except that the remaining colouring drained from their faces making them look like they were either going to vomit or pass out. Biotics was not something they had bargained on. “Leave.” He ordered in a tone of voice that practically screamed military.  

 

The two men hadn’t needed to be told twice, with a tone like that she had half expected them to bolt but instead they turned around and walk away with as much pride as they could muster. It almost looked like they had bowed out gracefully. As they retreated Nell stood up and turned towards him. “You’re early.” She pointed out gently, drawing his glare away.

 

“Says the woman who’s earlier than I am.” He drawled some of the residual anger still in his voice but there was a brief flick of a smile in his mandibles.

 

Trying to think of a way to break his mood Nell gave him a long obvious look over. Damn, he looked good. It was a style she had seen a lot in the month or so she had been on the Citadel. He was wearing black tight high-waisted pants and a coal grey shirt that showed off his hips and waist with an open front jacket in black with cloud grey accents. When she met his gaze again he had turned back into her normal adorable Lazz, although there was a heat in his eyes that made her face warm.

 

“You look handsome.” She blurted out past the lump in her throat as she rested her hands on the side of his cowl. If his shirt hadn’t been high-necked Nell was positive his neck would be blue from the way his mandibles fluttered.

 

He made a strangled little chirp and looked away from her. Oh yes, his neck was definitely blue, she thought stepping back to give him some space. This was the second time in as many days that the desire to kiss him was nearly overwhelming; however the middle of a crowded cinema lobby was probably not the place.

 

“Well since you’re here. Shall we line up for the tickets?” She asked trying to take his mind off her compliment. She knew he didn’t believe her yet and she hadn’t meant to say anything that would make him uncomfortable. It just came out and it was true, he did look so handsome in his civvies. Hell, he looked handsome even when he looked like a spiky Christmas tree.

_________________________

 

Nell had watched the whole movie with her head on his shoulder and her hand entwined with his. In the dark it had been easy to pretend they were alone so he had eventually grown comfortable enough to rest his mandible against her hair. It was impossibly soft against his plating and had smelt vaguely of flowers, he didn’t know what kind but that was what he smelt. He had spent half the movie wondering what it would feel like in his talons.

 

The movie hadn’t been terrible but it hadn’t been fantastic either, the effects were good and some of the jokes had even made him laugh but he didn’t remember a lot of it now that it was over. Nell had seemed to enjoy it though and that was what mattered.

 

“Where are we going?” He asked dragging himself out of his thoughts of how her hair felt and smelt. She was quietly leading him out of the complex, still holding his hand and leaning gently against him.

 

“It’s still early so I thought maybe we could go for a walk. I’ve never been to the Presidium but I’ve heard the gardens are nice.” She explained with a warm smile.

 

“I’ve never been there either. So what did you think of the movie?” He asked grasping for something to talk about. The purr in his chest was going out of control and he was pretty sure that if his heart could beat its way out of his chest it would. Hopefully if she was talking he would have time to get himself under control.

 

“It was good, I really liked it. He did a decent job at making it feel like a James Bond movie.” She started before she began picking it apart and comparing different pieces of it to the original. Golden Eye she said the original was called. When he was more comfortable with the idea of having her in his apartment he would ask her if she wanted to watch it with him.  

 

The Presidium gardens weren’t far from the cinema complex. They would be able to find somewhere to sit and talk because even though she had never once complained, Lazz was positive those shoes she always wore weren’t comfortable.

________________

 

Lazz was only half listening to Nell as they slowly walked through the gardens, holding hands and enjoying each other’s company. Their way was lit by a number of tiny lights along the edge of the path and he could hear a water fountain from the lake that was in the middle of the park.

 

“Wow this is pretty.” She exclaimed as they came out of the gardens to the lake. The fountains were lit by multi-coloured lights making them glow in the darkness like fireworks.

 

Not as pretty as you, he thought lamely. “Yeah it is.” He still had no idea why this pretty human woman had chosen him. That previous human hadn’t been bad looking, he supposed, just annoying. Hell in the movie, the Turian they had gotten to play Bond had been damn good looking. Why would she pick him when she could have anyone?

 

“Thanks for inviting me out.” She said quietly as she leant over the railing to look out over the lake. The blue shimmer was back in her hair as the now white lighting from the fountains caught it on the right angle.

 

“You’re welcome, as long as you enjoyed yourself.” He replied. Damn why was he talking in past tense, the night wasn’t over yet. Wait; did she want it to be over? It was moments like this when he lamented her lack of subvocals.

 

“It was fun.” Nell grinned up at him before looking out over the water. There was a long deafening moment of silence as he watched her smile out at the lake before she turned back to look at him. Nell didn’t need subharmonics when she looked at him like that. It was the same look she had given him when she had so obviously looked him over earlier, hot with a soft smirk curling the corners of her soft mouth. The kind of look that made his lower plate’s shift subtly, made him want to kiss her and nuzzle his forehead against hers.

 

“Nell, I…” Lazz began nervously before trailing off. _‘…don’t know what you want from me.’_ He finished in his head not knowing how to say the words, or if he even wanted to. It had been years since anyone had looked at him the way Nell did, in a way that made him feel attractive and desired. He _wanted_ to kiss her but he didn’t know much more than the basic mechanics. Also he was afraid of what it would mean for his heart if he did.

 

Lazz hadn’t realised that she had stood up until her free hand gently ghosted along his mandible. Spirits, she was so close…

 

“Lazz, if this is too soon for you let me know.” Nell whispered before she pressed her mouth to his. He couldn’t stop the disappointed thrum when it lasted only a moment before she pulled back. In that brief moment the need to kiss her had overridden his fear; he wanted to feel her tongue against his. The way he had seen in the vids he had watched ever since she had first pressed her lips to his mandible two days ago. He _wanted_ that intimacy with her, like he had seen other couples share even though it _terrified_ him.

 

Nell was looking at him and he could see the growing concern dimming out the desire in her eyes. Lazz realised she was waiting for a sign that the kiss had been ok, that it wasn’t too soon for him. Should he nod? He wasn’t sure his voice was going to work properly. Not knowing what else to do he pressed his forehead into hers, as his free hand came to sit on her hip and pull her closer. When she returned the pressure with a little hum of contentment that was surprisingly Turian-like he realised she had done her own research into Turian forms of affection.

 

Spirits, he was going to be a wreck if and when she left him. Hell, he liked her so much he was a wreck half the time she was with him.

 

The Turian kiss he had given her turned back into a Human kiss. Her mouth once again pressing against his and he did the best he could to return it this time. He didn’t have a soft mouth like hers but he lightly took her bottom lip between his plates and nibbled it. He must have done something right because she sighed into him, her whole body pressing against his as she let go of his hand and wound her arms around his neck. Her wet warm tongue darted out and ran against the edge of his upper lip plate.

 

Yep, he was definitely going to be a wreck if she found someone more worthy of her but right now he was ok with that, Lazz thought as his tongue darted out and tangled with hers. She tasted sweet to him and similar to the way she smelt; something that was all Nell.

 

When the kiss finally broke she nuzzled his forehead again with that little hum. If his heart hadn’t already been flopping around his chest like a fish out of water it would definitely be now. “So, how do you like Human kissing?” She asked huskily with a little smirk that told him she knew exactly how he felt about Human kissing.

 

What could he say without sounding like a love sick fledgling? That he loved it? That it was every bit as intimate as he had hoped and feared? That he would happily kiss her for the rest of forever? How by the Spirits, was he even supposed to speak over the purring in his chest? “It was fine.” He settled on after a few moments of thought and struggle to get himself under control.

 

“Fine?” She asked pulling back with a raised eyebrow. Human faces were so flexible. “Just fine?” She continued and he would have assumed he had said something wrong if it hadn’t been for the smirk pulling at her lips. She was teasing him.

 

As if to prove her point she kissed him again and snorted quietly at how quickly he returned it on reflex. Her fingers trailed lightly up and down the plating on the back of his neck, thankfully staying away from the patch of hide under his fringe and his fringe in general. The rumble in his chest was deafening and it was a struggle to suppress the moan as she sucked on his tongue for a moment before releasing him to nuzzle into his cowl.

 

“So, just _fine_ is why you’re purring like a cat so loud I think the whole Citadel can hear you?” She teased pressing a gentle kiss onto the sensitive hide of his neck. Spirits, he hoped she wouldn’t continue to do that. Otherwise they would have to have the awkward talk about Turian erogenous zones and how he wasn’t ready to go any further yet.

 

“What’s a cat?” He asked feeling embarrassed as he wrapped both his arms around her small soft waist holding her to him. Had he really been so obvious with his feelings that she knew what a Turian purr meant? Well maybe she couldn’t recognise the subtle differences in the sound but it appeared she had the general idea.

 

“Really? You don’t know what a cat is?” She asked sounding surprised. When he shook his head in reply she continued. “It’s an Earth animal that purrs similar to you when it’s happy. I’m surprised you haven’t seen one on the extranet.”

 

Oh. Maybe he wasn’t that obvious. “Why would I have seen it on the extranet?” Lazz asked curious as to why she would think he had looked up Earth animals.

 

“Well we used to have this saying that the internet was for porn and cats. So I’m surprised that Human’s haven’t managed to fill the extranet with cat photos yet.” She explained with a giggle.

 

“Humans are so strange.” Lazz grumbled leaning his face into hers as he held her. The arms around his neck tightened as she cuddled into him with a quiet chuckle. Turian’s never did this, just held each other like this but for some reason it felt so right with Nell. Everything with her was so easy and so right that it was frightening sometimes. It was so simple to just let his guard down and be with her despite his insecurities. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise for this chapter taking so long. Thank you for waiting both patiently and impatiently.


	6. The Lower Wards

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lazz finally manages to be earlier than Nell to coffee and discovers that waiting is not all that fun.

_“I can’t do this anymore, Lazz.” Nell said sadly before turning and walking away from him without a backwards glance._

 

Lazz’s eyes snapped open just as the dream Nell walked out of view. He felt clammy and overly hot, his subvocals trilled out in distress. It was just a dream, he tried to remind himself and calm down. She wouldn’t leave like that; nothing in her demeanour yesterday had hinted that there was anything wrong. She had kissed him so passionately before she caught her transit cab home for the evening. Everything was going great between them; it was just a stupid dream. It was just by a lingering insecurity that he hadn’t been able to dispel yet.

 

He rolled over to check the holo-clock he had on the nightstand next to the bed. 0630 he read with an internal groan before flopping back to his original position. He had woken up half an hour before his alarm was due to go off and there wasn’t much point in trying to get back to sleep. Lazz felt like he needed a shower to wash the bad dream away.

 

Lazz stood in the shower as the water ran over his plating, washing away the lingering cold sweat caused by the dream. It wasn’t helping at all with the knot of anxiety in his chest but then again he suspected the only thing that _would_ help was to see Nell. He would be early to the café this morning and surprise her. The look on her face to see him waiting for her for once would drive the memory of the dream her walking away from his mind.

 

To see Nell and nuzzle the crook of her neck, to hear her giggle when his mandibles tickled her ever so gently. That had been a surprise, finding that the base of her neck was ticklish if he fluttered his mandibles in _just_ the right way. The memory of the way she would squeal and try to half-heartedly shoo him away made him smile. She found a way to retaliate every single time he did it but that was half the fun.

 

It was a stupid dream, Lazz thought as he got out of the shower feeling a little better.  

 

____________________

 

Sometimes it was hard to believe that she had been living on the Citadel for over two months now; had been living in this shithole apartment complex in the lower wards for over two months. True, it was the only thing she had been sure she could afford at the time, not knowing how long it was going to take her to get a job after so long in the Alliance. There had been so many expenditures when she had first moved here that a good portion of her savings account had been used just getting set up.

 

She needed to move, desperately. If for no other reason than so she could eventually invite Lazz around without fear that he would worry about her. He didn’t know where she lived yet because she had never allowed him to walk her home beyond the transit station of Zakera Ward or the Presidium. Nell sighed to herself as she locked the door behind her. She would start looking into it tonight and perhaps talk to him about it over coffee or the lunch date they had planned for today.

 

As always she felt a little giddy with excitement at seeing him, the hardest part was always going home. Lazz wasn’t ready to take their relationship any further yet and she respected that but Nell still couldn’t help feeling like she didn’t see him enough. That the few hours they spent together every day weren’t enough and were never going to _be_ enough.

 

Nell also realised that their relationship wasn’t going to advance any further until he was ready to tell her about his fringe. The woman who dumped him after the injury, and she was positive that something like that had happened, had better pray Nell never met her. When he eventually told her about it she was going to do her best to make him aware of how handsome she found him and how much she adored him. 

_____________________

 

Nell had been walking down one of the alley ways on her route to the nearest transit station when she heard a muffled cry come from around the corner. The kind of cry she had heard a million times over when rescuing hostages that were gagged. Shit, that was not good…

 

Knowing what was waiting for her on the other side Nell stopped at the lip of the entrance with her back against the wall and quietly took her shoes off. She was mentally cursing her lack of armour and weaponry but there was no way in good conscience she could ignore a noise like that. Lazz was going to kill her for putting herself in danger, she noted ruefully as she engulfed herself in a biotic barrier hoping it would be enough.

 

As prepared as possible given the circumstances Nell peered around the corner. Three men stood a short distance away from a person pressed against the corridor wall, cowering and trying to look as small as possible. She couldn’t tell from here if they were male, female, adult or child but that didn’t matter. Two Batarians and a Human all armed in medium mercenary armour that showed battle scarring and armed with pistols and assault rifles.

 

Nell sighed, she hated slavers. Even if she could walk away from this they would likely try to nab her too on the way past.

 

Nell took advantage of the element of surprise and hit the grouped up mercs with a singularity. The human dropped his pistol on the ground as all three of them floated and bumped into each other in her anti-gravity field. Since she didn’t have a pistol on her own, Nell used another blast of her biotics to bring the fallen pistol to her hand; just like she had done a thousand times in Grissom. It was times like this however that she wished she was a tech expert and able to just blast them with a coded attack from her Omni-tool.

 

The gun came obediently to her hand like a well-trained Varren and she shot the three floating slavers with practiced ease. Float ‘em and shoot ‘em, standard Alliance biotic tactics. Now to get the hostage out of the way before any of their friends came…

 

She had nearly gotten the poor girl back to her alleyway cover when Nell felt two sharp stabs to her lower abdomen. For a moment she assumed they had been caused by the frightened woman next to her. After all, it wouldn’t be the first time someone she had tried to save had stabbed her. Then her brain finally processed that the sounds came from a heavy pistol fired from behind her.

 

Nell turned quickly once she realised what happened, the movement caused a sudden stabbing pain in her side that felt like her intestines were about to relocate themselves to the floor at her feet. The shots were fired by one lone mercenary standing in the middle of the hallway. He looked surprised that she was still standing as she gathered dark energy in her hand and hit him full on with a warp strong enough to scramble his internal organs into paste. A few last painful steps and Nell had got them to cover, the girl was mostly ok. Maybe a few broken ribs from the beating they had given her…

 

There were two small wounds to her left side abdominal region but it didn’t feel like it had nicked anything important. She would still likely lose consciousness from pain and shock within fifteen minutes at the most without medigel but it would take her a good two hours to bleed out and die. The shots had been precisely calculated to ensure she survived. God she hated slavers even more than she hated warp ammo. She would die before they took her or the girl quietly crying at her feet.

 

The thought was followed by stinging regret. She hadn’t told Lazz she loved him and there was no time now to send him a message. Nell shot another biotic singularity at more approaching mercs and gunned them down before darting back behind the wall with a groan. She should have just told him and not been worried about it being too soon. She was so stupid and now if she didn’t make it through this he would never know what happened to her. Knowing Lazz he would just think she had left him and he deserved so much better than that.

 

She didn’t know how long the fighting went on for but her vision was fuzzy from blood loss and shock, she was biotically exhausted and just to ice the cake she was running low on heat sinks. It was a miracle she hadn’t already run out, whoever had previously owned this gun had upgraded the heat sink capacity on it and for that she was grateful.

 

The last thing she remembered as the gun slipped from her fingers and her legs finally gave out from under her was a bone-white Turian with desert sand coloured eyes crouched in front of her. _I’m so sorry, Lazz._ She wasn’t sure if she had voiced the thought or not but everything went black.

_________________

 

Lazz was sitting in the table Nell normally sat at every morning staring out the window waiting for her to arrive. Now that he thought about it, he had never asked her what time she got to the coffee shop in the mornings. Surely she was due soon. Was the anxious knot in his chest just from the dream? Was it from the change in his routine? Is this how she always felt as she waited for him to arrive? He checked his Omni-tool, it was 0715 and normally he would arrive at 0730.

 

Spirits, waiting was hard…

 

Time dragged on, the minutes felt like hours and the lump in his chest grew heavier. It was now 0730 and she was late… that had never happened before, Nell was never late. He checked his tool again. There were no new messages and no missed calls. He sent her a message, trying not to make it sound panicked. After another ten minutes with no reply trickled past he sent her another, still expecting to see her run through the door flushed and out of breath. Was she asleep? Should he call her to try and wake her up? Or was she sick?

 

Lazz waited anxiously, his tea stone cold and sitting on the table undrunk until his alarm chimed. It was time for him to leave and head to work, yet she still hadn’t arrived. Where are you? Lazz wondered as he called her this time rather than fill her tool with emails but it went through to her message bank. Alarmed at not being able to get in contact with her, Lazz decided to wait another ten minutes and see if she would either arrive or call. Was her Omni-tool broken? Maybe he should take a look at it when he finally got through to her…

 

In the end he was late to work for the first time in his career. Had something happened to her or had she just left him and decided not to tell him? Surely Nell wouldn’t do that. His dream didn’t feel quite so stupid now his insecurities were beginning to go out of control.

 

“You’re never late. What happened?” Sam asked quietly after his supervisor was done lecturing him on the necessity of arriving to work on time. Once, one time in three years and he still had to sit through the damned speech. He couldn’t tell his supervisor that Nell was missing without sounding like he was overreacting, plus the man didn’t even know he had a girlfriend. That was something only Sam knew. 

 

“Nell didn’t arrive this morning. I can’t get in contact with her.” He trilled anxiously. He had no idea what to do, her Omni-tool wasn’t working and he had suddenly realised he didn’t know where she lived. A traitorous part of his brain was already trying to convince him that he would likely get a message in a weeks’ time saying good bye and he did his best to ignore it. She wasn’t like that.  

 

“Do you know where she works?” Sam suggested calmly. When Lazz nodded he continued. “So if she doesn’t contact you before lunch we’ll go and ask her boss. It will be all right, Lazz. She cares about you; she won’t have just disappeared without saying something.” Sam comforted him.

 

Lazz really hoped that she would contact him. That she was just at home sick and had slept through all his attempts to get in touch with her. Not that he liked the idea of her being that sick but it was better than the alternative; the alternative that she deliberately not returning his calls and messages.

 

At the thought of her deliberately ignoring him, Lazz’s subvocals rang out in a semi strangled off keen that had Sam putting a hand on his shoulder. Spirits, please let her just be sick so I can take care of her. Please don’t let this be her leaving me; he prayed trying to control the keening in his chest. Or if she is, just have her tell me so I know she’s safe and happy, he amended. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is a huge tone difference from the previous chapters and it just seems out of the blue. This chapter and the next one are the original ideas that spawned Lazz and Nell. Well they're a little different now but I like this version better than the one I dreamt up but the whole story was always going to hit this point.


	7. Anxiety

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lazz looks for Nell

_Beep, beep, beep._

 

What was that noise? She wondered fighting the blackness of unconsciousness. The more she fought the more noises came into focus. The sound of someone nearby rummaging through something, the sound of people further away talking, she could even hear the distant moans of pain. A memory flashed into her mind. Three men standing near a cowering figure on the ground, the sounds of gun fire followed by the stabbing pain of being shot. Panic that rose in her chest sped up the annoying beeping.

 

_Beep, beep, beep, beep._

 

There was a movement at her hands, the sensation of a vice being clasped and unclasped around one of her fingers. The sudden feeling did nothing to ease her anxiety. What had happened? Where was she? The last thing she could remember was a Turian crouched in front of her, he had yellow eyes.

 

The next thing that came into focus was smells. Her nose was assaulted by the harsh sting of sterile soaps and antiseptic washes. The smell did nothing to ease her panic. This was a hospital, she would know that smell anywhere. Shit, had they taken her? Her wound hadn’t been immediately fatal and it would have taken her a long painful time to die. All they would have had to do was wait for her to fall unconscious from blood loss. She couldn’t remember the uniform that belonged to the eyes.

 

_Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep._

 

The feeling was beginning to come back and she could wiggle her fingers and toes. That was a good sign but would she be able to get to a gun before they drugged her again? If the pain in her abdomen was anything to go by probably not but why had they taken her? Biotics weren’t practical to keep and sell as slaves. No one wanted a slave that could turn insides to paste; they were harder to break and could never be made completely harmless. After all changing her chip was extremely dangerous and expensive. If she was still alive did that mean that help had come? She hoped so. She needed to message Lazz and tell him she was all right. Assuming she was going to be all right… the jury was still out on that.

 

Opening her eyes was as hard as trying to push off the weight of a dead Krogan. She was so tired and her eyelids were so heavy but she needed to wake up and find out where she was. Water would be nice, provided she could be certain it wasn’t drugged; her throat was dryer than Tuchanka.

 

Everything was so blurry at first, all she could see were colours and in a hospital room there were not many. Out of the corner of her eye she saw a blue figure moving closer. For a moment Nell froze, her entire body paralysing with fear at the unknown person near her.

 

“Shh, it’s all right. Do you know where you are?” The Asari asked kindly, her hand lightly resting on Nell’s forehead. Nell shook her head, her tongue felt thick and dry in her mouth. She wasn’t sure she would be able speak clearly even without the fear clogging her throat. “Heurta Memorial Hospital, do you remember how you got here?”

 

Heurta… wait she knew that name. She was still on the Citadel and if she was in a local hospital instead of some dingy medical clinic in the lower wards then she hadn’t been captured. She was safe. All the tension and fear drained out her like someone had unplugged a bath. It took her a moment to remember that the nurse had asked her a question. Nell shook her head, she had no idea how she had gotten here but now it didn’t really matter.

 

“You were shot in the lower wards. You’re very lucky, the bullets failed to enter you’re abdominal cavity.” The Asari explained kindly before turning away to look at the monitors Nell could hear beeping. She hoped the nurse wasn’t pumping her IV with drugs, Nell didn’t want to go back to sleep yet. She wanted to say that luck hadn’t had anything to do with it but she didn’t know how much time she would have and decided to ask about Lazz first.

 

“Has anyone contacted Lazz?” Nell asked, trying her voice for the first time. It was surprisingly raspy, like she had one hell of a head cold. It was only after she voiced the question that Nell remembered that no one could contact Lazz, she hadn’t gotten around to listing him as her emergency contact in her Citadel files. They hadn’t been seeing each other long enough for her to do more than just consider it. It was stupid and she regretted it now, when she was well enough it was the first thing she was going to do.

 

“Who?” The Asari asked distractedly as Nell felt the drugs hit her system.  

 

“My boyfriend, I was supposed to meet him for breakfast and lunch. He’ll be worried.” Nell explained trying to fight the drowsiness. She didn’t want to be drugged again, if they doped her up she would fall asleep and Lazz would have to wait even longer. It was too late however, she could already feel the fog returning and making her brain fuzzy. Her pain was slipping away. Damn them.

__________________

 

The first thing Nell felt when the painkillers started to wear off and she began to regain consciousness was anger. She felt as mad as a spitting cat that they had drugged her before she could get them to contact Lazz. She was going to kill that damned nurse.

 

Her vision was clearer when she opened her eyes this time, her surrounding were no longer just one massive multi-coloured blur. She was in a small room, about the size of her bedroom at home with a large window on her three. Artificial midday sunlight flooded the tiny glass room. She had been missing for hours; Lazz was going to be worried sick. Was it even the same day? Nell wondered feeling distressed as she looked around at the other side of the room.

 

The first thing she noticed on her nine was more glass walls, this time they gave a view of the rest of the hospital. Through the parts that weren’t obscured by medical equipment she could see patients and doctors milling around in the corridor outside. The second thing she noticed was a white Turian watching her from a seat near the door. He stood and approached her slowly when he realised Nell was awake.

 

He had bone-white plating and orange-yellow eyes that reminded her of an Earth desert. He looked familiar and it only took her a second to remember him; he was the last thing she saw before she passed out. Nell would have been afraid if she hadn’t caught sight of his black and blue C-Sec uniform. Oh, so C-Sec had arrived to find out what all the shooting had been about…

 

“Hello. My name is Tecus Orienion; I am an officer for C-Sec and the one who brought you to the hospital. Do you remember me?” He asked politely putting his hands up in front of him to show her that he meant her no harm. It wouldn’t have made a difference if he did; she doubted she had the strength to use her biotics. She was also in so much pain she wasn’t sure she would be able to stand without an unhealthy dose of stims and medigel.

 

“Barely.” She told him with a nod. Maybe this Officer would be willing to find Lazz for her…

 

“I just came to see how you are. We will need your statement when you’re feeling better.” He explained. Of course she would need to give a statement; this poor guy was probably half buried under paperwork over this whole mess. When she nodded he continued. “The girl you saved would also like to see you when you’ve recovered and the doctor will allow it. She has already given her statement and has been treated for her minor injuries.”

 

“Oh good, I’m glad she’s all right.” Nell confessed feeling a little guilty that she had forgotten about the girl but to be fair, she’d probably only been awake for a total of ten minutes so far. “Uhm, Officer Orienion? I was wondering if you could do me a favour.” She asked before he had a chance to leave or the nurse came in a drugged her again. Now how to word this… Turian’s didn’t have girlfriends and boyfriends. Partner, maybe? Could she be considered his mate even though they had never talked about it? No, it was probably best to stick to the terms they had already been using.

 

“Yes.” He queried sounding both suspicious and curious at the same time. If this failed, if he was too busy she would have to try and talk to the doctors and nurses again.

 

“When I was admitted to the hospital nobody got in contact with my boyfriend. I had forgotten to update my emergency contact details so he hasn’t been told where I am or that I’ve been injured. I was wondering if you could possibly get in contact with him for me, please.” Nell heard herself explain more calmly than she felt. Somehow she managed to keep the desperation out of her voice. No need to make this more complicated by telling him that she had decided it was too early in their relationship to add him as her emergency contact. Damn it, she just wanted him here with her.  

 

The pale Turian Officer nodded. If she wasn’t injured and if it wouldn’t be entirely inappropriate, Nell probably would have hugged him.

___________________

 

Lazz was sitting a bench across from the ship he was supposed to be working on. He couldn’t concentrate and he was just making a mess of the drive core upgrades, it had taken him over an hour with Sam’s help to fix whatever it was he had done to the poor thing. Lazz was pretty sure his daydream about her smiling up at another male and touching his face was the point where he had butchered it; the poor innocent thing had become a casualty of his overactive imagination. Sam had bullied him to go take a break after the repairs were finished, told him quite sternly to go outside and call Nell’s store.

 

Nell still hadn’t contacted him and he couldn’t focus on anything else, his worries just gnawed away at him whenever he was left by himself. Where was she? Was she safe and happy? Was she sick? Not knowing was the worst part. Sam’s inane chatting had helped him keep his mind away from withdrawing into his thoughts; once he found Nell he would owe Sam a drink or several.

 

Lazz took a few deep breaths to steady his nerves; he should just make the call and get it over with. He wasn’t sure which was more worrying, that she had turned up for work and ignored him or she hadn’t turned up and no one knew where she was. No wait, scratch that; the latter was definitely more terrifying, Lazz berated himself. The possibility of something happening to her was _way_ more terrifying that the prospect of her breaking his stupid heart. He wished he was confident enough in her feelings to trust that she hadn’t just left, so he could just worry about her safety and nothing else. He was such an idiot.

 

Lazz wasn’t certain what he was going to do if Issana refused to give him Nell’s address, even though they were together giving out her details over the phone was pushing a lot of boundaries. By Turian standards he had no right to _even_ ask for her details since she hadn’t given them to him and wasn’t registered as his mate, he could only pray that didn’t hold true for Humans or Asari. Lazz pulled up his Omni-tool and looked up the name of the store Nell worked at before calling the number that popped up on the screen.

 

“Hello, this is Fashion Passion, Issana T’Lora speaking.” A feminine voice answered. Oh good, he got the manager straight off. Now if he could control his distressed subvocals throughout the entire conversation and not make an ass of himself that would be great. It would also be great if he didn’t go into what other species called overprotective Turian mode either.

 

“Hello. I’m Lazzus Tarrian, Nellwyn’s boyfriend. I haven’t seen her or been able to get in contact with her and I’m worried. Did she come to work today?” Lazz asked trying to sound as calm and polite as possible. Bombarding her with questions was not the best way to go about this, he tried to remind himself.

 

“No and I haven’t been able to get in contact with her either. You took your time in calling, I would have called you instead but that silly girl neglected to give me your contact details for emergencies.” Issana told him angrily. If he had known her address he would have gone to check on her before heading to work but it hadn’t occurred to him until Sam had mentioned it that he should have called her boss. Sam had said about lunch time. Had that been wrong?

 

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t sure you would even speak to me since Nell and I aren’t bonded.” He explained trying to keep his flange neutral. If she even wanted to bond with him one day… no don’t think about that, it’s not important yet. It didn’t sound like he was going to have any problems getting her address at least.

 

“I know the Hierarchy is stricter in regards to bond mates, which is why I would have called you.” Issana sighed sounding calmer towards him. “We’ll discuss this later to avoid future problems but right now that’s not important. I can’t leave the store since I wasn’t able to replace her shift today, I need you to go to her apartment and check on her. I wouldn’t be so worried but she has no family here and she lives alone in the lower wards.” Issana continued sounding frantic.

 

“Give me her address, I’ll go now.” He answered numbly. Spirits, Nell lived in the lower wards… Why hadn’t she moved? Did she not know that most of Citadel crime happened in the lower wards? Why hadn’t she told him? Was she embarrassed about where she lived? Lazz suddenly felt like they were back at her being afraid to tell him she was a biotic.

____________________

 

Lazz was standing outside the door of her apartment trying to calm down before he knocked. The fact that he had to walk the long way to her apartment complex had done nothing to calm his frayed nerves, in fact seeing the C-Sec crime tape and the bullet holes in the walls had just alarmed him more. He felt like he was going to be sick. At least in all his insecure day dreams she had been safe and happy… 

 

Lazz pushed away the unhappy keen that threatened to spill out and echo down the hall. He took a few deep breaths and knocked. Spirits, please just let her be sick, just one of those little Human colds that knocked them out for a day or so. Please don’t let her have anything to do with the C-Sec tape and bullet holes, Lazz prayed as he waited for her to answer the door. After a few moments he knocked again and was greeted by more silence.

 

Should he break the door down? No that was a ridiculous idea that would just get him arrested, could he hack it without detection? He gave the lock a quick look over; it was a fairly cheap interface that would require a key code attached to an Omni-tool to open. It would probably take him less than five minutes to get in. The question now was not so much _‘could’_ he but _‘should’_ he…

 

Lazz knocked again while trying to decide if letting himself into her apartment without her permission was a good idea. If she was a Turian she would likely kill him for invading her space uninvited but Nell was most _definitely_ not a Turian. Still, he couldn’t imagine any female of any species taking the invasion of her home well. His train of thought was interrupted by his Omni-tool chiming. It was Sam…

 

“Yeah?” He answered tersely.

 

“Hey buddy, C-Sec was just down here looking for you. Nell is fine before you panic but you need to get your bone-y ass to Huerta Memorial Hospital. The Officer will be waiting for you in the lobby, look for white plating and yellow eyes. Just be calm, it will be all right.” Sam explained in a rush. It was almost as if he was trying to get all the information out before Lazz hung up on him.

 

“Thanks, Sam. Can you tell the boss I won’t be back today?” Lazz replied trying to control the keening in his throat. She was in the hospital… How could she be fine if she has in the hospital? Spirits, he owed her an apology. His first concern had been whether or not she had left him and it had only occurred to him hours later that she may have been hurt. Even then it hadn’t fully sunk in until he set foot in the lower wards and saw the damage. He would apologise and do better, if she forgave him…

 

How much of the blood he had seen was hers? No, he wouldn’t think about that.

 

“I think he figured that out but I’ll let him know. When you see her tell her I said hi. Don’t forget to let her boss know where she is.” Sam reminded him before cutting the call.

___________________

 

Nell had refused to allow the nurses and doctors to drug her again until she saw Lazz; she wanted to be awake for it, so she could reassure him that she was fine. The sapphire blue Asari had repeatedly argued that as a biotic Nell needed sleep to recover, especially on the first day but she had eventually given in. That had been about an hour ago now. She hoped he would arrive before the Asari just knocked her out again…

 

She was staring unseeing out the window when the door on the other side of the room opened. Her head snapped around to see Lazz standing in the doorway. His mandibles were hanging loose at the side of his face; he looked as upset as she had ever seen him. He looked so unsure it was heartbreaking. Was that a keen she could hear? She wasn’t entirely sure.

 

“Hey there, handsome.” She said attempting to smile and keep her voice light as she patted the spot on the bed next to her. It was still a little raspy from all the drugs but not as bad as it had been a few hours ago. It didn’t fluster him as she had hoped but the sound of her voice and her invitation appeared to break whatever was causing him to hesitate. He crossed the tiny room in a few steps to sit gently on the bed before carefully pulling her into her arms. She felt her injury protest at the sudden movement but ignored it; Lazz would back off faster than light speed if he knew.

 

“Shh Lazz, it’s all right. I’m fine, really; a few minor injuries.” Nell consoled him stoking the plated back of his neck in an attempt to comfort him. Well, it was really to comfort both of them. Never seeing him again had been a real possibility; she had made a mistake and not watched her six. It was such a stupid mistake and one Nell would never make again, she was supposed to be far better trained than that.

 

“I’m so sorry Nell.” He mumbled over the low rumbling keen. She was just about to ask him what he was sorry for when he continued. “I’m so sorry. You were hurt and my first thought was that you had left me. I’m so sorry.” He confessed making her laugh.

 

Ow, that hurt. He pulled back and gave her a mightily offended look, but there was a tiny twitch to his mandibles that _might_ have been a smirk. “You’re not getting rid of me that easily.” She joked despite feeling like she wanted to cry.

 

“Good because this is never happening again, Nell. You’re updating your emergency contact details as soon as your Omni-tool is reactivated. I don’t care if we’ve only been seeing each other for a month. I don’t think I can take another day like today. Not knowing if you’re sick or dead. Spirits, even thinking you had left me without a word was preferable to banging on your door and hoping the blood in the alleyway wasn’t yours.” He burst out angrily as the low distressed keen shifted into a rumbling growl. 

 

“I’m sorry, Lazz.” She told him teary again as she pulled him down so she could bury her face in his neck. Shit, he had gone to her apartment and had seen that alleyway. He buried his gloved talons in her hair and fluttered a mandible against her jawline before kissing her roughly. It was all she could do to hold on to his cowl as her body broke out in goosebumps and her breathing quickened.   

 

“It’s all right now. We’ll get through this and you’ll get better. I’m proud of you, for saving that girl. You did the right thing even if you scared the shit out of me.” Lazz replied sounding as out of breath as she felt as he pulled back to look at her. His emerald eyes held some lingering anger and sadness but they were as soft now as the hand he used to wipe a stray tear from her cheek. “Nell, I… I’m sorry, I should trust you more. Please forgive me for misjudging you and letting my insecurities get the better of me.”

 

It was sweet that he was still apologising for that. He must have really been beating himself up about it after Officer Orienion had told him she was in the hospital. She had known he would think that, how could he not? She would probably have thought that it in his place, after all she had been gone over half the day with no word at all.

 

“It’s forgiven. Lazz, I…” Nell began before she was cut off as the Asari nurse she was considering holding a grudge against came into the room. Damn it, she had just been gathering up the courage to tell him that she loved him. It still felt too soon to say but she didn’t want to regret it ever again. Would he think she was creepy for saying it after only a month together?

 

“Who are you and what are you doing in a private room? This patient isn’t allowed visitors yet with the exception of family.” She began angrily before taking a step back at the semi-feral growl that erupted from Lazz. Maybe this nurse rubbed everyone the wrong way; Nell thought as caressed the back of his neck to soothe him.

 

“Patient mentioned mate. Was not expecting Turian, could be problematic. Would require body bags and Krogan to remove; must stay. Glad he’s here, patient more relaxed. Stay longer and fight us less. Humans have aversion to hospitals and med bays, tend to become difficult and leave too soon. Mate maybe prevent that.” Her tall thin Salarian doctor informed the nurse rapidly as he walked in the room and over to the medical unit to check her stats. “Records say ate two hours ago?”

 

“Yes.” Nell replied feeling more at ease now that the Nurse had been overruled. A feint blue tinge had crept up Lazz’s neck at the word mate but he had said nothing to contradict it, merely just levelled a killer glare at the Asari until she huffed and looked away.

 

“Feel sick?” was the next question.

 

“No.” She had been starving by the time they had deemed her well enough for food. Hospital food was usually just as bad as ship rations. She suspected the food they had given her was really standard biotic military fare, bland but packed full of calories to prevent her body from burning her fat reserves to refuel her biotics.  

 

“Good. Need more sleep, used too much biotics. Insufficient calorie consumption to handle heavy combat now retired. Mate still be here when wake up.” The doctor informed her. Nell felt the rush of painkillers hit her system through the IV she had in her arm. The drowsiness was almost instant, like sinking under the water and drowning. She hated that feeling.

__________________

 

He could stay, Lazz thought feeling relieved as he watched Nell drift back to sleep. He brushed her hair away from her face and pressed his forehead to hers with a sigh. She smelt of disinfectant, medication and blood but she was safe and alive, that was what mattered. Spirits, he thought he had walked into a nightmare when he first saw her sitting on the bed looking so drawn and pale. He would take care of her and make sure this never happened again. When he looked up the Salarian doctor was watching him knowingly.

 

“Best not dwell on what could have happened. Mate lucky and skilled, good combination will be fine now. Wounds relatively minor for Human. Stay in hospital three maybe four days, two at most without mate. Good you’re here. Humans stubborn with high pain tolerance, very problematic as patients. Almost as bad as Krogan. Will wake in two hours, should eat while asleep. Cafeteria in lobby.” The doctor explained as he brought up his Omni-tool shaking his head. Lazz would never get used to how many words a Salarian could fit into a breath. 

 

Lazz got off the bed and pulled the lone chair in the room up next to her bed before slumping into it as the doctor distractedly wandered out of the room. He would eat later; right now he wasn’t ready to leave her side and he had to call Issana and let her know Nell was in hospital. He should also call his boss and let him know he wouldn’t be coming to work for a few days and tell Sam. Spirits, he was exhausted. 


	8. Pampered

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Night time conversations in the cold.

The only thing that grounded Nell when she woke during the night freezing cold and disorientated was the warmth spreading through her right hand, the feeling of it being held and knowing it was Lazz. It felt like the cold had seeped into her bones, all her joints were stiff and it took effort to control the tremors shaking through her body like tiny earthquakes. Why did they always have to make hospitals so damned cold, if she wanted frost bite she would have moved to Noveria, Nell fumed silently as she looked about the sparse tiny room.

 

The only source of light was coming from through the darkened glass windows, through it she could see doctors and nurses patrolling the hallway obviously tending to the many patients in the ward. Still the meagre lighting was enough to illuminate the room in a gloomy haunted house glow without ruining her night vision.

 

Nell looked down at the only part of her body that was warm and saw the darkened shape of Lazz at her bedside, right where she knew he would be. He was asleep with his head on the edge of the bed holding her hand and if it weren’t for the tremors of cold that mirrored her own, he would have looked peaceful, if uncomfortable. He was going to have one hell of a crick in his neck in the morning if he continued to sleep like that, Nell thought with a frown. She should wake him up and try to send him home.

 

Nell shifted painfully so she could lie on her side facing him and gently caressed his fringe with her free hand. She couldn’t wait until she could move without pain. Even in his sleep Lazz hid his damaged fringe, Nell noted with a frown as she trailed her fingers over his longest spike. It was covered in a patchwork of tiny pockmarks and chasm like cracks, the worst of the damage felt almost glass smooth against her skin, like it had been buffed out and covered in something to prevent further damage. Nell instantly decided she loved the way his fringe felt against her fingertips.

 

“Wake up.” Nell urged him quietly as she moved to stoke his cheek. Lazz mumbled and fussed a little in his sleep making her chuckle painfully. He was so damned adorable. "Lazz, wake up." She told him louder this time.

 

“Are you all right? Do you need a doctor?” Lazz asked sounding alarmed despite still being half asleep. In the gloom she saw him sit up straight and shake his head roughly in an attempt to clear it.

 

“I’m fine. You should go home and get some sleep.” Nell urged him as she tried not to shiver.

 

“No. Are you sure you don’t need the doctor? You’re shaking.” He suggested as he brought his hand up to brush her cheek. “Spirits, Nell. You’re freezing.”

 

“It’s fine. They just make hospitals so damned cold, probably so that the people who die of boredom don’t start to decompose. You really should go home, there’s no need for both of us to be cold and uncomfortable.” She joked poorly but it did make him chuckle at least before he was shaking his head again.

 

“Not a chance. Do you need me to find you more blankets?” He replied sounding determined. Was it too much to ask for one of them to be comfortable? Apparently it was…

 

“Fine, you can stay but get you’re plated ass up here and keep me warm.” Nell informed him ignoring his suggestion of more blankets. The hospital probably didn’t have enough of the thin blankets to keep her warm anyway.

 

“Nell, even if you think it’s only a minor wound I can’t get up on the bed with you. What if I hurt you? I’ll get you more blankets so you’ll be warm.” Lazz suggested pleadingly as he tried to reason with her.   

 

“Somebody save me from overprotective Turians. Seriously I will be fine. It’s only a flesh wound, I’ve had worse. We’re more durable than you think.” Nell ranted feeling frustrated all of a sudden. “Up or out, Lazz.”

 

Lazz heaved out the heavy hard done by sigh that all partners regardless of species seemed to have and rubbed his face for a moment. Nell carefully moved over as far as she could, while trying to keep her IV out of the way, to make room for him on the thin bed. He was almost maddeningly gentle as he slid himself into the bed beside her, rolling on his side so that he could comfortably lie next to her without being bent at an odd angle by his carapace. It was a little uncomfortable with his light engineer armour on but Nell never going to mention that.

 

“Just don’t put any weight on my left side.” She told him quietly as she snuggled in as much as she could, despite his armour. This would be easier if she could either roll into him or press her back against him but either motion would hurt like a bitch. She was stuck on her back until further notice.  

 

“I shouldn’t be up here. I could hurt you.” He complained, nuzzling his nose into the side of her head before making like he was about to roll back off the bed.

 

“You won’t so stop worrying, besides I’m warmer now.” She informed him as she grabbed his hand and held it between her own. He always wore the damned gloves and she wanted to feel his hand in hers.  

 

“What _are_ you doing?” He asked sounding perplexed as she proceeded to pull his glove off and began to play with his fingers for no particular reason. His hand was huge compared to her tiny delicate one with two thick fingers and a thumb, double the width of hers. It was peppered with tiny protective plates over the back of his hand and down his fingers before they tapered into short blunted talons. The ends had been delicately rounded off.

 

“Why do you always wear gloves? Even when we’re just out together you still wear them.” She asked idly as she began to massage the palm of his hand with her fingers.

 

“Turians have talons; it’s considered polite in galactic society for us to keep them covered. The same way you would keep a gun holstered, I suppose. I keep mine short for work because they get in the way and I would hate to accidently slice a wire with them. As for why I wear them with you… habit mostly.” He purred, obviously enjoying what she was doing. Was it really just habit?

 

“I like them, they’re pretty bad ass.” Nell told him as she played with his rounded off talons before going back to massaging his palm. “But I’m glad the responsible one in this relationship has the talons and not me. I’ve managed to cut my thumb open before on my own nails.” She continued with a half-hearted laugh. Lazz groaned in exasperation and mumbled something into her hair that sounded suspiciously like _‘you will be the death of me’_ and _‘they’re not even sharp’_.

______________________

 

He should not be up here; Lazz couldn’t help thinking as he nuzzled her hair. He could hurt her by accident _so easily_ but every time he had voiced his worries she had shot him down, protesting that she wasn’t so easily injured while not _two minutes later_ confessing that she had once hurt herself on those pathetic things Humans called nails. Spirits, she was going to be the death of him.

 

Any other day before today sharing a bed with her would have terrified him for all the normal reasons. It would typically mean that they were about to have sex for the first time and while that was something he wanted, it petrified him. Would he hurt her? Would he be able to last long enough to satisfy her? It had been such a long time since he had been with anyone. Would it _even_ work? Anatomy diagrams he had seen on the extranet said it would but still… their bodies were _so_ different.

 

His species were plated and hers were all soft and squishy. What if she found she wasn’t sexually attracted to him after seeing the difference? What if _he_ did? It was stupid. He was most definitely attracted to her and could tell she felt the same. She certainly wasn’t put off by his un-gloved hands and he look she frequently gave him after they kissed or when he nuzzled her neck often had his plates shifting. However the only thing he was afraid of right now was hurting her by putting weight on her left side. He missed his old reasons for worrying; at least they had been stupid and baseless…

 

Speaking of new things he was afraid of now, the thought of her going back to the lower wards alone was probably going to give him nightmares for a while. It had been the furthest thing from his mind when he walked into the hospital but part of him was still angry at her for not telling him she lived in an area that was so dangerous, knowing her she had neglected to tell him so he wouldn’t worry. Lazz knew had no real right to be angry at her for keeping things from him; it wasn’t like he had told her everything yet either. But still… it wasn’t like his fringe was going to land him in hospital with gunshot wounds.

 

“Nellwyn? Why didn’t you tell me where you lived?” Lazz blurted out suddenly unable to stop the question. Spirits, why was he picking a fight with her over something that couldn’t be changed, Lazz wondered as he felt Nell tense up beside him and drop his hand like it had burnt her.

 

“I don’t know.” She sighed sounding weary. Damn it, he should be encouraging her to go back to sleep not asking something that might cause a fight. “I guess I didn’t want to worry you and make you feel like you had to walk me home all the time. You know the worst part? I had been thinking about moving so I could invite you over.” Nell explained confirming his suspicion about her reasoning.

 

“You failed on the not worrying me part. Just so you know.” He choked out bitterly over his subvocals. They were beginning to know each other too well. He _would_ have insisted on walking her home, just so he knew she was safe.

 

Lazz sighed heavily against her shoulder as a soft keen erupted from his chest. They probably would have fought over it at some point, just like how he was still trying to pick one now against his better judgment. He was just so frustrated, angry, upset and tired. In the military someone would have dragged him to the sparring ring just so he wouldn’t antagonize his mate with all his pent up emotions, but he didn’t have that here. He needed to drop it, it couldn’t be changed and taking his feelings out on her would just drive her away when he should be focusing on helping her recover.

 

“Lazz? Can I stay with you for a few days after I get discharged? I can ask Issana if I can stay with her instead if you prefer.” Nell asked cutting through his thoughts. If he hadn’t been so close to her he might have been foolish enough to take her words at their neutral tone but he could hear the unevenness of her heartbeat. She was worried about being a burden on him and asking for more than he was comfortable of giving.

 

“Of course you can stay, for as long as you need to.” Lazz replied trying to keep the dismay out of his subvocals as he brushed a blunted talon over her cheek. Was this a Human thing? They hadn’t been together long but did Humans not look after their sick or injured mates? Or had he really been so hesitant in their relationship that she seriously thought he wouldn’t want to take care of her while she recovered? Spirits _that_ was a heart-breaking thought.

 

“I hoped you’d say that. Thank you Lazz.” Nell mumbled as she rubbed her cheek against his talons.

 

“I’m always here for you, Nell. Now go back to sleep. It’s late _or_ early depending on how you look at it. Everything else can wait till morning.” He reassured her, trying and failing not to resent how she had thanked him for doing something so normal.

 

If he wanted her to consider being his bond mate one day he needed to trust her and show her, she could trust and rely on him too, Lazz thought annoyed with himself as he carded his talons through her hair. It would have worried him that she had spent so much of the day asleep except that the doctor had assured him that she required it to heal. She snuggled in closer to him as her breathing began to slow. At least she would be staying with him.

______________________

 

The first thing Nell asked Lazz to do for her the next morning was buy her a toothbrush. She felt disgusting and while she could live without a shower for a couple more hours, the taste and feeling of unbrushed teeth was something she absolutely couldn’t stand. Lazz returned half an hour later with breakfast for the two of them, coffee just the way she liked it and a bag she wasn’t allowed to open until after she had eaten. How much did he buy? She had only asked for a toothbrush.

 

Nell was horrified when she finally opened the bag. Not only had he bought her a full set of toiletries but probably one of the most expensive toothbrushes on the market. What the hell? She thought dumbstruck as she stared in the bag.

 

“Lazz, when I asked for a toothbrush I meant the cheapest one. You’ve spent a fortune on this.” Nell croaked out meeting his gaze.

 

“I asked the woman in the shop for help. I don’t know anything about Human dental products. There are soaps for your hair and skin in there too.” He shrugged looking proud and completely unconcerned that she had guns cheaper than this bag of stuff. He looked so proud of himself in fact that all her arguments died on her tongue.

 

Her pride was itching to have him at least take the toothbrush back and buy her a cheap one but what if this was a Turian thing she didn’t understand? Breathe Nell, she thought, there are other ways to repay him for this that won’t damage his pride and hurt his feelings.

 

“Thank you.” Nell replied simply, at a loss for what to say that wasn’t protests. Until she thought of something to do for him in return, the best thank you she could give him was to use everything he had just bought her; starting with this offensively expensive toothbrush.

 

Nell gave him a warm smile as she slid carefully off the bed and grabbed the IV stand for support. Lazz was at her side in a heartbeat, his hand sliding under her elbow to support her in case she fell. God, she felt like a 90 year old woman with the hobble to match. Her back was nearly bent double as made her slow, heavily aided way to the bathroom with Lazz wordlessly at her side. After the fuss he had made about hopping up on the bed next to her, Nell had thought he would protest but he didn’t. Instead he just helped her shuffle slowly to the bathroom, carrying her toothbrush and the bag he had bought her.   

 

“Are you alright?” He asked as she let go of her improvised walking stick and clung to the sink for dear life. Damn room had barely been ten steps away but she felt exhausted, like she had run a marathon in full armour. Nell was sore too, not stabbing pain but the sore of wounds protesting her lack of patience and stubbornness. The bathroom was a micro room attached to her slightly bigger one. Just big enough for a shower and a toilet, little else; a cheap plastic chair was sitting underneath the shower nozzle.

 

“Yeah, I just hate feeling like this.” She grumbled, looking up into the mirror. Fuck, she looked terrible. Her dyed hair was hanging limp and slightly greasy over her shoulders and she could see the pain in her face. She was pale and sallow looking, her cheeks flushed from exertion were the only colour in her face aside from the dark circles under her eyes. Behind her in the mirror she could see Lazz hovering at her shoulder, he looked like shit too. His plates were dull and the skin under his eyes was black with stress and weariness, even his eyes were somehow dimmer. The sparkle in them covered under a layer of worry.   

 

“It won’t be for long. The doctor said it would take two weeks for you to heal enough to at least do a part day at work. You’re already standing, which is more than I would be able to do with that wound. Just be patient Nell. I’ll help however I can just don’t push so much you hurt yourself, please.” Lazz replied, resting his hand between her shoulders blades.

 

“I’ll try, though to be honest I’m more of a slap some Medigel on it and walk it off kind of person.” Nell confided, catching his eye in the mirror with a rueful smile. She had never spent any more than the bare minimum of time in the med bay.

 

“I’m glad I didn’t know you in the military then. You’d have sent me to an early grave.” Lazz groaned, glaring at her and making her giggle painfully. “Come on, I’ll open this. Can you sit for this or do you need to stand?” He said holding up the toothbrush still in the packaging.

 

“I’d rather stand.” Nell replied, hoping that she hadn’t just lied. If she needed it, she knew he would bring over the chair for her. At least now she knew that she could at least get to the bathroom, even if she needed some help. There was a loud ripping noise as he destroyed the packaging and then the toothbrush was being placed gently into her hand.

 

Nell had just been finishing up when from the other room she heard the doctor walk in. “How are you… oh, patient gone. Patient and mate _both_ gone. Humans problematic.”

 

“We’re in here.” Lazz called, shifting behind her to face the door.

 

“Ah. Already standing, good sign. How do you feel?” The Salarian doctor asked as he bustled into the room. Nell put the toothbrush on the side of the sink and reached for the IV stand so that she could face him.

 

“Sore but better. Can I be discharged today?” She asked him. It was worth a shot and it wasn’t like she didn’t have Lazz to help her.

 

Her doctor glared at Lazz for a moment before answering like he had anticipated this question. “No, must run tests. Make sure everything is healing. Also need blood samples from both you and mate. Test for allergies. Not allergic to each other but maybe allergic to common things found in Turian and Human homes. Better safe than sorry. Maybe discharged tomorrow depending on mobility and pain levels.”

 

Nell sighed heavily; just what she wanted… more tests.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So writers block again, sorry guys. Not really happy with this chapter but at least something came out, mostly at random times over a span of mornings. Her whole hospital stay was going to be one chapter but that was what caused the block so the chapters are being split.


	9. Visitors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lazz learns a few new things about Nell and proceeds to continue spoiling her rotten.

Nell was able to stand a little straighter the next day, 80 years old today instead of 90, not a huge improvement but it was something. She walked a little steadier too, made it to the bathroom feeling less exhausted. Today what she wanted the most was a shower, she would kill for a shower. She would kill _many_ people for a shower. It was always a bad sign when you could smell yourself.

 

“Lazz. I’m going to have a shower.” She informed him after she had brushed her teeth.

 

“Are you sure that’s a good idea? Maybe you should wait for Doctor Solus’s approval first.” Lazz suggested with an alarmed warble to his subharmonics. He thought she was pushing herself too hard and it obviously terrified him. 

 

“Who?” Nell stumbled for a moment, thrown off track.

 

“Well that explains why you’ve just been calling him the Salarian doctor. I know he talks at mass relay speed but you should at least know his name. His name is Doctor Nehan Solus by the way.” Lazz explained laughing at her.

 

“I was preoccupied when he introduced himself and _no_ I’m not waiting. I’m disgusting Lazz, if I got anymore greasy I could just ooze back to the bed. They have a chair and I’ll call you if I need help.” Nell told him, brushing it off and returning to the matter at hand. She wasn’t going to tell him that she had been more concerned with letting him know where she was than with remembering a doctor’s name.

 

“You’re not disgusting and Humans can’t ooze. Is this going to be like the teeth brushing thing yesterday?” Lazz asked her, leaning down so he could press his forehead to hers.

 

“Worse.” Nell grinned at him making him groan in resignation as she pulled him in for a quick kiss.

 

“Doctor _Solus_ wasn’t kidding when he said Humans were terrible patients.” He complained half-heartedly. Well the good doctor hadn’t warned her that Turians could be so fussy. While he may have _mostly_ given up on arguing with her, aside from putting his foot down yesterday afternoon when she asked him to take her to the cafeteria because she was sick of this damned room, he was spoiling her rotten. All yesterday he had sat up on the bed with her while they watched things on his Omni-tool, bringing her whatever food she wanted and that bag of stuff she hadn’t quite gotten over yet…

 

“I promise I’ll call as soon as I need help.” Nell laughed. He gave her a searching look, looking for any hint that she was lying to placate him before sighing heavily.

 

“I’ll be just outside the door if you need anything. Do you need help getting your shirt off with the catheter in your arm?” Lazz asked as he straightened up. Oh, she hadn’t thought that far.

 

“I don’t suppose I could just pull it out?” Nell sighed knowing the answer to that.

 

“No.” He growled as he unknotted the ties at the back of the hospital shirt. At least unlike the Earth ones this set was a top and loose pants with a draw string, so she hadn’t been showing him her ass every time she got up. Not that she thought he would complain. Do Turians even appreciate asses or was it just waists? Nell wondered as she pulled her shirt off and watched as he threaded the intravenous bag through her wide sleeves and untangled her. This would have been a nightmare to try and do herself.

 

After he had hooked the bag back up to her makeshift walking stick Nell went and collapsed into the waiting chair. Lazz fussed for a few minutes, unpacking the bag of toiletries for her before he left. If it wasn’t for the fact that his neck was blue tinged Nell might have been insulted by how little he cared about her being topless. Not that a hospital was the right place for that. It had totally killed all the joy out of him taking her shirt off. Damn it…

 

_______________

 

Nell was once again sitting on her small bed, fully dressed with soaking wet hair and a towel around her shoulders. She felt a million times better, smelt a million times better. Thanks to the toiletries Lazz had bought her. She was completely drained but had managed to shower all by herself, the only help she had needed was getting her shirt back on.

 

“What are you doing?” Nell asked confused as Lazz began to pull up the front of her shirt.

 

“Having a look at the damage.” He replied as she felt a cautious talon scratch over her bandage. “Is it supposed to have that brown patch in the middle?” Brown patch? Oh…

 

“That’s just old blood. Probably left over from the surgery, don’t worry about it.” Nell answered with a wince when his mandibles clicked close to his face in a frown. This was probably the first time he had been around a Human injury. Of course he would be worried.

 

Lazz gave her a look that said he damn well would worry about it before sighing. “So what caused this one?” He asked changing the topic. His hand moved to trace the scar on the other side of her bellybutton. She knew the one he was talking about without looking. It was a two inch wide scar that was smooth and silver with age.

 

“I got stabbed in an alley once. There’s a story if you want to hear it?” Nell replied wondering if this was a good idea. It was a good story, one of youthful stupidity but probably not the best one to tell at the moment. Lazz considered for a moment before nodding, one ungloved talon still lightly tracing over it.

 

“Well, I was just out of basic training. Or rather the version of it Biotics from Grissom have to go through. Grissom is an Alliance facility so we’re pretty well trained by the time we graduate, but we still have to go through the official fitness tests. _Anyway_ , I think I was nineteen or something. Just completed my first mission and was on my first shore leave. Young, naïve and drunk. Perfect combination.” Nell began with a grin before snorting when Lazz groaned.

 

“Please tell me you didn’t pick a fight with a Krogan?” He pleaded, burying his face in his free hand.

 

“Nothing that fun.” Nell laughed. “So I was stumbling back to the ship when I heard someone crying in the alley way next to me. I look over and there’s this woman leaning against the wall _just_ at the edge of the light, about half way down maybe. So… being young, naïve and drunk, I decide to go help her. She told me this great big heartbreaking story about a fight with her boyfriend and how she sprained her ankle when he pushed her over and couldn’t walk. Being the gullible idiot that I was I decided to help her home. I got her maybe a meter before I felt a sharp pain in my stomach and I look down and there’s this big ass knife in me.” Nell told him. She had learnt a lot about the world that night but not nearly enough. Hell of a lesson to teach a sheltered kid though.

 

“She stabbed you? Why?” Lazz asked confused and angry. He was right; it was terrible manners to stab someone who was trying to help you without warning.

 

“No idea, didn’t ask. She had probably planned to rob me or she hated the Alliance, possibly both. It’s surprisingly hard to stab a Human to death so it wasn’t a well thought out plan and she hadn’t counted on a drunk, angry Biotic. I have a very nasty warp.” Nell explained. Normally she would have finished this story one or two sentences earlier and left out the part about her being a Biotic but this was Lazz. It was surprising actually how many people just assumed she had beat the snot out of the woman and turned her over to the police rather than warp her insides into chunky soup. That was most of what made the story so amusing to her.

 

The look Lazz gave her told her that he understood that she had killed the woman. It was a softer look than she expected, even from him and she felt her throat close up for a moment when he bent his head and ran his mandible along the silver scar. “I’m sorry that happened to you.” He told her gently and she felt his breath tickle against her stomach. Nell hadn’t expected that, mostly she just got laughed at and told she had been stupid or that she was lucky. Then again she had never told it to anyone who cared about her as much as Lazz did.  

 

“It’s fine. I’ve experienced worse since then.” Nell shrugged. There was a long moment when he met her eyes with the green ones she loved so much. It was the kind of understanding that didn’t come when you dated a civilian. They had both experienced things, so many things, different and yet the same.

 

Then he smiled, it was a little tight around the edges but oh so sweet. “So were you also a nightmare of a patient back then too?” He drawled breaking the lousy mood she had created so easily.

 

“The doctor kept me high as a kite on pain meds for the first four days and threatened to strap me to the bed if I didn’t behave.” Nell laughed; glad the mood was broken back to what it had been. Lazz shook his head and brushed his forehead against hers as he stood up.

 

“I think that might be Doctor Solus’s plan if you keep pestering him about leaving.” Lazz teased as he walked around the bed behind her and pulled the towel from her shoulders. Turian’s and their fascination with Human hair, Nell hummed to herself as he began to pull the excess water from her hair. She had never liked others playing with her hair but she could get used to this. He was spoiling her rotten…

______________________

 

Lazz was standing outside Nell’s apartment for the second time in less than a week, this time with her door passcode but still technically uninvited. He was supposed to be going home to shower and rest, something he resented being bullied into but he had decided to pick up what she would need to live at his for a week or so. At least if he did it now he wouldn’t have to do it tomorrow after or before she was discharged. Lazz chuckled to himself, if the doctor tried to keep her any longer than tomorrow there was probably going to be bloodshed.

 

Lazz took a deep breath and punched in the code, the door opened with a swish. He was going to fix that before he left, it was too easy to hack. The first thing he noticed as he walked through the door was that her apartment was tiny. The second thing he noticed was the guns on her dining table. One handgun on a beige cloth was completely disassembled with cleaning spray off to the side. The rest of her small square table was covered in handguns of various models displayed in some kind of order he didn’t understand. Wait; was that one of the old models that didn’t use heat sinks? Those were worth a fortune now. Leaning against one of the table legs were two assault rifles and three SMGs, everything he noticed was heavily modded. Were those mods even legal? Upon closer inspection Lazz realized they were, if only barely…

 

Spirits… Well, at least she wouldn’t complain about all the tech scattered on his table at home. Actually he should probably tidy that up; they would be using it at some point for meals and he didn’t want anything to get lost or broken. Dragging his eyes off the table Lazz looked around at the rest of her living room.

 

She had a small couch in front of an Omni screen and a large bookshelf along one wall, the rest of the room was fairly sparse apart from the small coffee table. On one shelf of the bookcase was an Omni frame with three people smiling. One he recognized as a much younger Nell, like all Turians he was terrible at telling Human ages but she looked in her early teens. Her hair was a light brown colour instead of the black he knew and loved but her grin and eyes were the same. The other two he assumed were her parents. The older woman looked very much like her daughter except that her hair was a golden colour instead of brown. The man had the harden look of a man who had never quite left the war he had fought, from him Nell had gotten his hair colour and his smile, so at odds with the hardness behind his grey eyes.

 

Lazz prayed to all the Spirits that Nell never got that look in her eye. Although she had looked slightly haunted earlier until he had broken the tension in her. Sometimes it was easy to forget she had been a soldier up until two months ago. He should really stop snooping and pack her things and go pack instead.

 

Nothing could have prepared Lazz for walking into her room. Her scent was everywhere in the apartment, obviously but it was overpowering in here. His mating instincts hit him like a sledgehammer to the gut. It was ridiculous. He was about to temporarily move her into his Spirits damned apartment to live with him. She had agreed, suggested it even. That _should_ have been enough to prevent the itching desire to start invading her space with his possessions but apparently not.

 

Lazz stood in the doorway taking a few deep breaths. Her possessions are going to be scattered all over your apartment starting tomorrow, he reminded himself. It didn’t really help but it was something. He remembered hearing Sam once complain about how his girlfriends always took over his bathroom. It didn’t matter that it wasn’t happening the Turian way, it was happening and that was enough. Perhaps earlier than he had thought but he wasn’t as panicked about it as he assumed he would be. He just needed to get through packing her things. Lazz opened his eyes again after one last deep breath and walked to her wardrobe.

_____________________

 

Lazz could hear the soft sounds of talking from Nell’s room as he walked down the hallway. So the doctor had finally approved her for visitors. He was torn between the urge to leave her to have her conversation and the desire to see who was visiting her, because it didn’t sound like her boss’s voice. The door was open, not that it mattered all that glass would have allowed him to see who was visiting her anyway but without the swish to give him away, Lazz leant on the door frame and watched the scene within.

 

Nell was sitting on the bed with her back to the door, holding a young girl in her arms with another older woman sitting on the bed next to her with her hand on Nell’s back. The girls yellow gold hair mixing with her black over her shoulder and she was rocking gently. Lazz could hear whispered mumblings of _‘I’m sorry’_ , _‘thank you’_ and ‘ _I’m glad you’re alright’_. After a long moment the girl pulled back allowing him to get a better look at her. She was young, the same age perhaps as the Nell in the photograph in her apartment. Just a teenager, too young to completely understand the horror that Nell had saved her from but grateful all the same.  

 

Lazz understood he had been unfortunate enough to come across a slave ring, once. Some soldiers managed to go their entire career without seeing one; it was why he hadn’t been angry at her for putting herself in danger like that. Nell had saved at least three people with her recklessness; the girl, her mother and a Soldier who found her. If she was lucky enough to be found before she was sold that is, not everyone was of course. Only a small percentage were ever found; broken, starved and tortured in holding pens. Once they made it to the Batarian system it was impossible to save them. Lazz took a deep breath in an attempt to shut the memory away; he could selfishly and happily go the rest of his life without seeing the inside of another slave ship.  

 

It was the startled intake of breath that brought him back; his eyes snapped open to see the young girl staring at him with wide brown eyes. Ah, a strange beat up Turian. Of course he made her afraid. He almost missed how Nell’s shoulders stiffened as he wilted into himself. Almost missed the way the girl glanced at her and shrunk back a step. There was an almost imperceptible shake of her head before she turned towards him with a bright smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes.

 

“Welcome back. This is my boyfriend Lazzus.” She greeted him with genuine warmth before her voice turned hard as she introduced him with a false smile at her guests. The words _‘I’ll come back later’_ died on his tongue as she turned back to face him and patted the bed next to her. “Lazz, this is Sorcha.” She continued introducing the girl who still looked startled.

 

“Nice to meet you, I’m sorry for lurking I didn’t want to interrupt.” He replied knowing he had long missed his chance to get out of this without incurring his mate’s wrath. He strode forwards towards the bed and pressed his forehead to hers with a comforting hum as she reached up to stroke his face in a way he found equally comforting.

 

“Uhm, nice to meet you. I was just thanking her for saving me.” Sorcha squeaked, still looking out of her depth and like she wanted to be anywhere but here now. To be fair on her, she had been through a lot so being afraid of strangers was understandable. She relaxed a fraction when Nell gave her a genuine small smile before the smile died as the girl’s mother stood up briskly and put her hands on her daughter’s shoulders.

 

“We should really get going now. It was lovely to meet the woman who saved my daughter.” Sorcha’s mother injected as she guided her daughter a few steps towards the door. Lazz couldn’t help the sad hum of guilt that escaped his subvocals; they were leaving because of him.   

 

“Yes that’s probably for the best. Good bye Sorcha, good luck at school.” Nell dismissed with a brittle smile under eyes that had hardened to ice. It was the same look she gave the whispers that followed him. She was _so_ angry on his behalf, Lazz noted with a clench of his heart.

 

“She’s been through a lot this week, maybe cut her some slack.” Lazz suggested as they disappeared down the hall.

 

“That’s not an excuse but we’ll see.” She growled pulling him close and burying her face into his neck. “Did you have a good rest?” Nell muttered changing the subject, her breath brushing against his hide as he stroked her hair.

 

“Yes.” He lied without a second thought. She was in no mood to hear about how he had packed her overnight bag, fixed her door and cleaned out her fridge to be transferred into his. He had just popped home to unpack her food and shower before returning to the hospital.

 

“Liar.” Nell chuckled pulling back to look at him sternly for a moment before pulling him in for a possessive kiss. Her arms slipping around his neck to trail along his plates as her tongue flicked along his mouth plates. She pulled back leaving them both slightly breathless as her forehead pressed against his. She always ended their kisses like that, like it was the most natural thing for her to do. “So what were you really up to?” She asked huskily.

 

“I went to your apartment and packed your things.” He conceded with a sigh.

 

“Of course you did.” Nell laughed before cutting it off suddenly. “You didn’t touch my guns did you?” She asked startling a laugh out of him.

 

“No, I’m not that stupid. They’re right where you left them on the dining table.” He replied, rubbing his nose against hers. He had briefly considered tidying up her table before his survival instincts had kicked in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last hospital chapter. Woohoo


	10. The Hard Conversations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lazz has a bad ending to an otherwise decent day. Nell is there for him.

Lazz didn’t like this new _temporary_ routine of getting coffee in the morning without Nell, it was the third day of his return to work and he already loathed it. It was surprising actually how quickly he had adjusted out his old routine, how natural it had become to spend his spare half hour every morning with her, unfortunately it was not so easy to adjust it back. It made him feel like he was drifting, waiting for everything to go back to normal. Well perhaps not completely normal, waking up next to Nell every morning was an experience he would happily get used to, even if there was no sex involved yet…

 

The first night he had tried to do what he thought was the right thing and take the couch. Although his apartment was larger than hers, it still didn’t have a spare bedroom. Nell had caught his arm and pulled him into the bedroom with her, citing that she liked the feel of him sleeping next to her and had already gotten used to it. There had also been something else about how she wouldn’t just kick him out of his bed but he had stopped listening, too preoccupied with the first part of her reason. When he had woken the next morning before her, comfortably curled around her soft warm body, Lazz had realised that adjusting to sleeping alone again was going to be depressing.   

 

Lazz had just sat down in the staff room, with an unhappy sigh, to drink his tea like he used to when his supervisor walked in. The male was half a head taller than him at nearly 7ft, dark brown with creamy white colony markings. He stopped and looked at Lazz like he wasn’t expecting to find him in the tea room this early in the morning, and he probably wasn’t.

 

“How’s your mate today?” He asked looking back down at his Omni-tool. Although he had been slightly mollified to find that Lazz had been late in regards to his mate and had begrudgingly allowed the week holiday to take care of her, it was still a bit awkward. From a company point of view his supervisor was still very much pissed at him.

 

“She was sleeping when I left but she’s been getting a bit better every day.” Lazz replied neutrally as he took a sip of his tea. Human recovery rates were terrifying. His father had told him stories of Human tenacity and durability when he was a child but he had always had trouble believing that of such a squishy species. His father had been right of course, Lazz had been forced to admit that within the first year of his service to the Hierarchy.  

 

“That’s good. You, Nelson and Oran will be working on an emergency job that just came in. Frigate class wants the skylight in the Captain’s cabin covered permanently. Dimensions for the window have already been sent and the steel cover is being cut now, should only take a few hours to install.” His boss replied sending the details to Lazz’s Omni-tool.

 

“Windows are a structural weakness, why would a frigate have windows?” Lazz asked as his Omni-tool pinged.

 

“No idea. Human made vessel.” Was the reply like that answered everything.

___________________

 

“So how’s Nell?” Sam asked cheerfully as they walked to docking bay 18 for their job. There was no detail about the name of the ship they were working on and that concerned him but he supposed they would find out soon enough.

 

“Going stir crazy, she’s completely taken over the Omni-screen.” Lazz chuckled. At least she was no longer freezing in the hospital and she had something to do, even if that something was to watch every series ever made.  

 

“She still giving you shit over that toothbrush?” Sam teased. Sam had visited the second day of her moving into his place, with a bunch of flowers. Lazz was never going to tell his friend that somehow he had managed to buy a bouquet of nearly all the flowers Nell was allergic to. She had started sneezing within two hours of them going on the table and he had been forced to re-home them to a neighbour after Sam left.

 

Sam and Nell had started an embarrassing conversation about how much Lazz had spoilt her during her stay in the hospital. Unfortunately it had included telling Sam all about that toothbrush and how she knew it had cost him a fortune. Lazz wasn’t offended by their teasing, he knew she appreciated it. She used it every day and there was affection in her smile and warmth in her voice when she teased him with _‘I could buy a whole toothbrush for that’_ whenever she saw something expensive advertised on TV.  Although he had muttered half-heartedly about how they were ganging up on him.

 

“Yeah, I don’t think that’s going to stop any time soon. I also think she’s planning on modding all my guns in retaliation.” Lazz sighed. He had made the mistake of showing her the guns he had kept after he moved to the Citadel. Unlike Nell he wasn’t retired, Turian’s had to serve until they were 30 so he still had two more years to go before he could properly retire. She had looked at his weapons and frowned like they offended her. He would count himself lucky if she just modded them.

 

Sam laughed like he was joking.

 

“So, it’s true you have a mate then?” Oran asked from behind them, cutting off Sam’s laughter. With the exception of Sam, Lazz spoke little to the rest of his workmates and had a reputation for being unsociable and guarded, which had never bothered him. Most of his own species were made uncomfortable by his appearance since it was a stark reminder that it could happen to them.

 

“Yeah.” Lazz replied tersely trying to keep the warning growl out of his subvocals. That question and the surprised tone that usually accompanied it were beginning to grate.

 

“Why would she mod all your guns? I can’t picture a girl like Nell modding weaponry.” Sam asked changing the subject. Oh, and what would you imagine a girl _like_ Nell doing, Lazz thought annoyed before he took a deep breath. It was his own fault that Sam didn’t understand anything about his mate, it wasn’t like Lazz had ever indulged him in talking about her.

 

“Nell is ex-Alliance. She served as Gunnery officer so she loves weapons just as much as she loves the store she now works in. If you ever need a weapon maintained or modded I suggest you ask her about it first.” Lazz explained trying to keep the bite out of his voice. Perhaps when she was better he would ask her to go to a range together, or Armax. He was more than a little curious to see what she would look like in armour and how her fighting style paired up with his.

 

“Huh, never would have picked it.” Sam replied distracted in a way that made Lazz wonder what his friend would think about her being a Biotic. It wasn’t his secret to tell though.

 

“Wait. Your mate is Human?” Oran injected making Lazz wince. He had been hoping the male would just let that slide past and not comment. Turian Human couples were rare, unlike Turian Asari couples. If he remembered correctly Oran’s mate was Asari…

 

“Yes she is… Spirits is that the Normandy?” Lazz trailed off, coming to a halt in surprise. But it was destroyed… and smaller. With fewer windows… Why was it flying Cerberus colours? Did that mean Shepard was alive? Nell was going to be so happy… and so angry. She hated Cerberus.

__________________

 

Nell heard the door click and swish open from the bed where she had been reading on her Omni-tool. It had been three days since Lazz had gone back to work, leaving her alone in his apartment. God, Nell couldn’t wait until she could go back to work. His room was a lot bigger than her tiny box one with a large Turian style bed in the middle against the back wall. It was the bed that had most confused her, a giant bowl shape filled with pillows to support his carapace and fringe. Getting in and out of it took some careful planning with her injury but it was surprisingly comfortable.

 

“Nell?” Lazz called from somewhere near the kitchen in the other room. She should get up; greet him with the welcome home kiss that had become so natural in such a short space of time. At first it had felt awkward, greeting him in his own home. It had felt like she was doing something incredibly intimate but then she had remembered the way he had nuzzled her head before he left for work and how it had made her feel. He had purred like the big cat he secretly was for over an hour after she had kissed him and asked how his day was.

 

“Coming.” Nell called as she considered the best way to pull herself out of the bed without hurting her wound. Ugh, she should have just read on the couch.

 

The living area in Lazz’s apartment dwarfed hers. The kitchen looked like a real kitchen rather than a cramped cupboard and it opened up into something that actually resembled a dining area. His dining table was covered with what appeared to be an old sheet and covered in bits of tech be brought home from work. It had been clean and used for meals right up until he went back to work, now the tech fairies visited every time he came home. He was just as bad as she was and eventually they would need to work out a better system.

 

Nell entered the living area to see Lazz was standing in the kitchen staring at the package that had arrived for him, just staring at it like it was about to hurt him. There was a slump to his shoulders and his mandibles were pressed in tight against his face, he also hadn’t looked up at the sound of her footsteps and that worried her. Was it the package? Most people were happy when they got mail from family or had something happened at work. No, he had sounded normal when he had first called out her name; she would have heard this in his voice even if he had tried to hide it.

 

“Lazz, what’s wrong?” Nell asked as she walked over to him. He tensed at the sound of her voice, as if he had forgotten even for a moment that she was still in his apartment before sighing and finally looking at her. It wasn’t quite anger, it was mixed with something she couldn’t describe and more guarded than she was used to. What the hell?

 

“Nothing. It’s fine.” He replied tightly, turning away from her to head to the dining table. Nell grabbed his hand to stop him from leaving. For a tense moment it seemed like he was going to pull away from her but then he sighed, it was a resigned sad sound and she hated it but Nell felt herself relax. “Do you think I should cover my fringe?” Lazz asked dejectedly still partially turned away from her.

 

The suddenness of the question had her mentally reeling. What kind of question was that? How long had he wanted to ask her that? Why would he even think that she would want him to cover his fringe? What did this have to do with that package?

 

“No, why?” Nell replied instantly despite all the questions flowing through her thoughts as reached up to turn his face towards her.

 

“No reason, don’t worry about it.” Lazz mumbled deliberately not looking at her as he half-heartedly nuzzled his face into her hand. He was trying to shut her out, either because he didn’t want to worry her or because he didn’t want to talk about it. There was no way in hell; however that she could let him stew in whatever was upsetting him.

 

“No, this is _not_ nothing and I _will_ worry about it. Why would I think you need to cover your fringe?” Nell demanded determinedly.

 

“Really Nell, you’re asking that? You’ve been out in public with me, you’ve seen the stares and the way a place will go quiet when I enter it, the whispers. Spirits, even that girl you saved was ushered away from you once I entered the room. That wouldn’t have happened if my fringe had been covered.” Lazz bursts out over the angry growling of his subvocals.

 

Ok, anger was good. Well, it was better than avoidance and telling her it was fine and he was fine when he most definitely _was_ not.

 

“Yeah, I know and you know what? All those people can go fuck themselves, they’re rude pieces of shit who don’t even deserve to know you. So, I’ll say it again. No, you don’t need to cover your fringe.” Nell growled back, crossing her arms over her chest and glaring at him.

 

Lazz stood and stared at her for a moment in shock before sighing and stepping back so he could lean on the kitchen counter. “You don’t understand what a broken fringe means to my species.” 

 

“Because you’ve never explained it to me.” Nell pointed out, as she slipped an arm around his back to try and pull him into a hug. Lazz was stiff as a board for a moment before he sagged towards her and buried his face in the crook of her neck. He wrapped his arms around her and held on like he was terrified she would disappear and she could feel the sad keen that had replaced his anger, vibrating through his chest before he pulled away.

 

“I know, I’m sorry. I meant to, I just…” He began before he trailed off, shaking his head with a sigh. “Turian males attract females with the length and condition of their fringe. It’s not just a point of vanity but an instinct. Mating, of course requires more than just appearance but a female won’t even consider a male unless she likes how his fringe looks. Well, that and the width of his waist.” Lazz explained tightly, like he was trying to keep all the emotion out his voice and flange. It made him sound detached, like he was reading a documentary.

 

“So a broken fringe is devastating for a male?” Nell queried just to make sure she had it right. She hated how he avoided her gaze and could feel anger building in her chest like bile.

 

“For _any_ Turian, but yes. A broken fringe basically means I would never be able to find a mate amongst my own species, even without all the plate damage.” He said not looking at her with his mandibles clamped tight against his face. So the plate damage was a problem too, maybe like scarring but not the end of the world like the fringe was.

 

“What, so they would completely disregard you just because of your fringe, even though you’re wonderful, sweet and caring.” Nell burst out angrily. All right so you couldn’t force attraction but a lot of finding someone attractive came from their personality and what you looked for in a partner. Also he was so damned handsome, cracked plating, chipped fringe and all. Not that she could tell him that right now and not have it sound like she was dismissing his feelings or trying to placate him.

 

“Only Krogan find scarring attractive but the general idea is that a male who couldn’t care for his fringe would be unable to care for a mate or younglings.” Lazz explained sadly as he slipped an arm around her waist and pulled her towards him. Nell gave a derisive snort but allowed herself to be folded into his embrace. The idea that something like that could be assumed just from the condition of his fringe was ridiculous to her, particularly from such a militaristic species.  

 

“How did it happen?” She asked pulling back to look at him as she ran her fingers along his cheek plate out across his fringe spike. He flinched a little under her touch but didn’t pull away, for the first time allowing her to explore his plating. Had he ever allowed anyone to touch his fringe? Nell wondered sadly. Somehow she didn’t think so.

 

“It was a mission that went wrong.” Lazz began hesitantly, taking a breath to calm himself. “I honestly don’t remember all of it but we were taking out a Blue Suns base and it was a trap. They tried to bring the whole base down on us and I got caught in it. I woke up a week later on a Turian Medical Station. When I saw the damage, when… when I saw how other’s reacted to me. I… I needed to get away and start a new life somewhere else.” He told her, burying his face in her shoulder again and holding her painfully close. Nell ran her hands briefly over his fringe before wrapping them tightly around his neck.

 

“Why on the Citadel and not on Palaven with your family?” Nell prompted, curious. Surely starting a new life all alone and still learning to deal with a life changing injury would have been hard. Family could have helped him cope and get through the worst of it. She was unprepared for the bitter laugh that shook his body; it stopped as quickly as it came.

 

“It would be worse on Palaven or any Turian colony; I would be forced to cover my fringe every time I stepped outside, just to live a normal life and be accepted. Other species don’t see my injuries through the same filter; to most of them I just look dangerous. Even the Turians who live here react better. Isn’t that the same reason you chose the Citadel?” He explained the bitterness still in his voice.

 

“Yeah…” Nell sighed, pressing her forehead to his. It was more or less the reason she had chosen the Citadel. “I don’t understand how the package fits into this.” She inquired after a moment, breaking the false calm.

 

“It’s from my mother, most likely. She, uhm, thinks I should cover my fringe.” Lazz sighed, his mandibles pressing in tightly to his face again. “She says my life would be easier if no one could see the damage.”

 

“Tell me about it.” Nell prompted as she ran her hands around his cowl.

 

“They visited shortly after I moved to the Citadel, both of them. Even though they knew what my life would be like on Palaven they weren’t pleased about my decision. We fought about it their entire visit but the worst part was the little comments. Nothing major but just about how I would never raise up the ranks of the Hierarchy as a ship engineer, even though I love it and have never wanted to do anything else. Mum made comments about how I was never going to find a mate and she would never have grandchildren or about how if I had taken better care of my fringe I wouldn’t have been left by the female I had been courting before the accident. How I would never find a female like that again and I had thrown it away because I couldn’t take care of myself.” Lazz explained as his subvocals keened out his unhappiness at the memory.

 

So she had made it all about her, Nell thought angrily as she threaded her arms back around his neck and held him. His stupid mother had blamed him for something that wasn’t his fault. Oh, she was so not going to get along with that woman at all. “You got caught in a trap, that wasn’t your fault. If a female left you just because you got injured then you deserve better than her and it sounds like your mother would be a shit grandmother.” Nell muttered angrily making him chuckle weakly against her shoulder. It was something. The tiniest lift in his mood but it was something.   

 

“She refused to go outside with me unless I was covering my fringe, which led to more fighting. The comments and looks by strangers made dad uncomfortable, he mostly just ignored it but heavily agreed with my mother about how much easier my life would be if I covered the damage. I was so glad when they left, they haven’t visited since but I get the occasional vid call. Spirits know how much I enjoy those… The packages started coming a month or so after they left. Most of the time they contain some new hat or hood to cover my fringe.” Lazz told her sounding angry underneath all the hurt.

 

So even three years later his mother was still embarrassed enough about his appearance to send him things, that… that was really awful. Instead of supporting him and helping him adjust they had just made it harder for him. “I’m sorry. Lazz, I’m sorry but your parents are assholes, they should have supported you and helped you adjust but they didn’t.”

 

Lazz didn’t reply, instead his arms tightened painfully around her waist pulling her hard against him.

________________

 

Lazz wasn’t sure exactly how it happened, but one minute he was in the kitchen telling Nell about his fringe and explaining about the package. The next they were lying in the bed with his arms wrapped possessively around her waist as she held him. Somehow in his empty haze she had managed to get him somewhere they would both be comfortable, where he would feel safer, where she could wrap herself protectively around him.

 

Part of him was unsurprised that he had been forced into telling her, somehow in the last month he had managed to forget he had been due to receive another one. Of course it would arrive while she was living with him. Damn, he should have just held himself together better rather than turning a simple, yet difficult explanation into an emotional breakdown. He should have known she wouldn’t let him walk away from her in such a fashion.

 

What by the Spirits had possessed him to ask her if she thought he should cover his fringe? It had just slipped out; his parents hadn’t forced the conversation _he_ had. Well at least, in the worst way possible it was over now.

 

“Are you feeling any better?” Nell asked breaking the comfortable yet heavy silence. Her fingers tracing over his cheek plate and out across to the tip that made up the first spike of his fringe. At least that side was unbroken, just chipped and covered in shallow surface cracks.

 

“Not really.” Lazz mumbled with a sigh. He really hoped this dull empty feeling wouldn’t last as long as it usually did.

 

“Anything I can do?” She suggested, her fingers still absentmindedly tracing further along his fringe. He didn’t even have the energy or the will to shake her off, to protest that it didn’t feel as it should and she shouldn’t touch it.

 

“No, just this. This is nice.” He answered, shimming a little closer to her. For now this was all he had the energy for.

 

Lazz hadn’t realised he had fallen asleep until he felt the soft drag of Nell’s fingers against his mandibles as she woke him up. He remembered getting up because her stomach was rumbling and them both making dinner, Nell throwing the package that had upset him in the bin with a look that said she’d rather be setting it on fire and sitting down in front of the Omni-screen to watch something, though he couldn’t remember what.

 

“Come on, time for bed. You’ll have a crick in your neck if I let you sleep on the couch.” Nell teased as she pressed a small lingering kiss on his mouth plates before dragging herself carefully off the couch.

 

It wasn’t until Nell was asleep, her back moulded against his chest like she belonged there, that Lazz remembered that in the midst of everything he had forgotten to tell her about the Normandy. Not that he was in a good place tonight to do the story justice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope i managed to do this chapter justice. Please tell me if how shit this situation is didn't come across. i also wanted to join this piece back into the main story.


	11. Armed and Injured

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nell is well and truly down the road of stir crazy and remembers Lazz has a gun collection.

Lazz stood outside the door of his apartment with a rumbling growl clawing its way up his throat, his attention caught by the scent of an unfamiliar Turian male. It was faint, hours old but still unwelcome, particularly with his mate being injured. Shaking his head in an attempt to push his territorial instincts back down where they belonged, Lazz reminded himself that Nell was in little danger from a lone visitor, Turian or otherwise, and unlocked his door to step inside.

 

“Nell?” Lazz called as he came into the dining room, stopping at the table in the centre of the room and began unpacking his work things. Why did he smell gun oil?

 

“Just a second… just need to finish this up.” Nell called distractedly, catching him off guard for a moment. That was odd.

 

Lazz looked over the back of the couch at the sound of her voice and noticed Nell sitting on the floor in front of the low coffee table with her back to him. Boxes were scattered across the floor, stacked in precarious towers and was that his gun collection? He had a sinking feeling that the three handguns and the sniper carefully laid out on the floor were his. Apparently today was the day she had gotten tired of watching the Omni-screen and had finally remembered he owned weapons. Damn… was it wrong that he had been hoping she would forget about them for another month at least?

 

“Please tell me you didn’t go out today?” Lazz asked trying to sound calm as he remembered how he had held her too tightly the other night while he was upset and split the scab open. Nell, of course, being Nell would never have mentioned it if he hadn’t decided to check her bandage the next morning before dragging himself off to work. The idea that she may have gone out and carried those boxes home herself after the damage he had caused, made his plates itchy.  

 

“No, I had it delivered.” Nell answered, knowing what brought the question on. Well, that explained the visitor today, Lazz thought as he turned his attention back to unpacking his work things.

 

“Done.” She exclaimed suddenly drawing his attention back to her as she began to stretch carefully, he could hear the quiet pops her spine was making as she cracked it and her little sigh of pleasure. That was by far one of the most disturbing Human traits and it never failed to make him wince, even if the sound of her little sighs tended to shoot straight to his groin plates. How in the hell did that not hurt? If a Turian did that it would be a trip to med bay. “Sorry that took so long, was supposed to be finished before you got home but I lost track of time.” Nell explained as she smiled at him as he lowered himself into the couch next to her, careful not to knock anything over or jolt her.   

 

“Do you feel better now that my weapons are up to your incredibly high standards?” Lazz asked her with a quiet chuckle. It was nice to see the sparkle back in her eyes and the flush of smug pleasure in her face. Being house bound was boring and she had been starting to act like a caged Varren.

 

“Yes, much better. So I upgraded the Thermal Clip capacity for each gun as well as tweaked the Mass Accelerator output to increase the damage per shot. I also upgraded your sniper scope; it’ll track targets and you’ll no longer be blinded by dust. I could have reduced the weight but you’re _used_ to them. I was worried about making them too light and it throwing you off and something happening to you because of it…” Nell explained excitedly before trailing off as her eyes clouded with worry.

 

Lazz looked over at the weapons she had arranged on the floor; again he could see a certain order to them that he still didn’t understand. Weapons were not his thing but he could see the difference to them and like her ones in her apartment, these barely looked legal anymore. Somehow though, he didn’t think this was _just_ because his weapons weren’t up to her standard or because she was getting him back for everything he had done for her recently, although he was sure that was part of it. There was just a kind of quiet desperation to her that worried him.

 

“Thank you, Nell. I’m sure they’re perfect but why don’t we go practice at Armax with them after you’ve been cleared by the doctor?” He suggested, brushing his talons through her hair. Something to look forward to might do her good.  

 

“That sounds fun. You’ll let me know if they’re too heavy or the recoil is too much, right?” She insisted giving him a tight smile. Yep, there was more to this and it wasn’t going to be deflected so easily.

 

“What brought this on, Nell? I mean, I know you were going to do this eventually but why now?” Lazz asked gently. All right, so he wasn’t comfortable with how much she had just spent on his weapons but he had resigned himself to it. Looking at the collection he realised it could have been worse; she hadn’t actually replaced anything with the new models, which was weird.

 

“Well, it’s what I do. You’re the tech guy and I do the weapons but I was just thinking. You know with Shepard back everything is going to hell soon, right?” Nell explained as she leant her head on his leg. “I mean, she was _dead_. You don’t get much deader than sucked into space and crashed on a planet. So since she’s back that means you get a weapons upgrade.”

 

As much as he hated to admit it, she had a point. If Shepard was back, if someone had brought her back from the dead, then something very bad was either happening or going to happen. The council might want everyone to believe that Sovereign was a Geth ship and that Saren was somehow the mastermind but there wasn’t a Turian or Quarian engineer on the Citadel who believed that, most of the other race’s engineers didn’t really believe it either. The question was, if Nell was so worried, why hadn’t she replaced all his gear with the new models? Ugh, he was going to regret asking this…

 

“True, there’s something big going on but if you’re so worried why did you just mod my weapons? I know they’re not the latest models.” Lazz inquired. It was probably pointless to point out that they could have talked about it and he could have bought his own weapons with her help.  

 

“Honestly, there’s nothing worth spending the credits on just yet.” Nell explained sounding disappointed before her voice took on a lilt that made her sound like a kid in a candy store. “The new Carnifex comes out next year, which we’ll be getting. The capacity is shit, nothing I can’t fix with mods but the damage output is going to be amazing. They say after you go Carnifex you don’t go back, so I’m excited to see if it will live up to my expectations. I’m not sure what we’re going to do about your new assault rifle yet, nothing I’ve seen is really wowing me but you’ll need one. Although, there are rumours about one coming out in Omega late this year by a company called Ama-Lur Equipment that _might_ be worth the creds.”

 

That weapon would most definitely be illegal, if not before Nell got her hands on it unquestionably after but, that was an argument for another day. Somehow, he had a feeling it was just going to turn up in a box one day.

 

“When all those new weapons come out, you can pick what we buy and I’ll start getting the components to upgrade our Tools, all right? We’ve got time.” Lazz said comfortingly. He doubted she would be so worried about the impending shit storm that may or may not happen if she wasn’t cooped up in the apartment but preparing wasn’t a bad idea. “Why don’t you come up here and give me my welcome home kiss, then I’ll help you pack all this up?” He purred, deciding to end the conversation for now and making her laugh, which was the point.

____________________

 

Damn he was sexy when he purred like that, Nell thought as she heaved herself off the floor. At least he was feeling better now and most of the playful teasing had returned. She had been worried about him in the few days he had sunk into a depressed silence, just going through the motions. True her cracked wound hadn’t helped any with his mood and no amount of reassurance that it was fine, that she had done worse catching it on the corner of the kitchen table last week had helped. It was stiff but not overly sore.

 

He had only been in the frame of mind to tell her about his job on the Normandy yesterday. It was one hell of a story. Shepard back and working for Cerberus, Nell had spent most of the day thinking about the implications of that today and had only ended up worrying about what the future would hold. Lazz was right, all they could do was prepare for the worst and deal with it when it happened. Still any excuse to play with his guns was a good one, probably the most productive thing she had done in over a week. Ugh, if this ever happened again, she was seriously going to need a more time consuming hobby.

 

Enough of that, Nell grumbled to herself. It was time to kiss the handsome Turian, which was by far her favourite part of the day; even if she had completely gone stir crazy.

 

“No, Nell. Not until that wound has been cleared by the doctor.” Lazz growled as she slid into his lap to straddle him.

 

“What? I’m just going to kiss you.” Nell replied in her best innocent voice as she pressed her forehead into his.

 

“Uhuh.” He groaned, completely not believing her as his talons dancing trails down her spine in a bit of his own revenge as he tilted his head to capture her lips with his. God damn him and his stubbornness; he was even worse about the damned thing now than ever. All right so she understood that he was afraid of hurting her and damaging her wound further, to be honest it was something that concerned her too but damn if she didn’t want him anyway.

 

“Have I mentioned I hate your stupid rule?” Nell grumbled when the kiss broke.

 

“First time today.” Lazz replied laughing huskily at her over the rumbling in his chest. “It’s only two more days until your appointment with Dr Solus. We can talk to him about it then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> was going to be one chapter but i ended up splitting it. Been a while since i've written more than an assignment so let me know if there are any huge inconsistency. Once i'm more back into the swing of writing for fun i might end up redoing this whole chapter. On the upside i now have a shiny diploma of fashion design.


	12. Cultural Complications

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nell and Lazz come up on their first cultural misunderstanding. 
> 
> Adult rated chapter.... or at least mature teenager...

Those two days before her appointment had been a nightmare, probably made worse by the expectation of being released for work. Nell was willing to settle for even half a day this week, just to be out of the apartment. There was only so much TV she could watch, Lazz didn’t have all that many books and she had already rearranged or cleaned most of his apartment. Seriously, anyone less patient than Lazz would have killed her by now and would be looking for somewhere to hide the body. To say Lazz had not been impressed when he couldn’t find his coffee cup one morning because she had rearranged his kitchen cupboards the previous day was the understatement of the cycle.

 

The other reason she was dying to go back to work was because Issana had ordered in three new dress lines that she was dying to see _and_ they had finally sold the last offensive piece from that ugly collection she had hated so much. Apparently a woman in a black hood had bought it, although Nell was sure it was as a joke at some other poor woman’s expense, that or she was blind. None of the pieces had sold as well as Issana had hoped, not that Nell was in the least bit surprised. As much as she loved working for Issana maybe one day she _should_ own her own store, if for no other reason than getting control over new arrivals. Something to think about later maybe…

 

“You’re deep in thought, Nell. Is anything worrying you?” Lazz asked quietly as he automatically pulled her closer to his side. She could feel the rumble of concern through his shoulder.

 

“Nothing, just hoping the doctor comes soon. I _really_ hate this place.” Nell grumbled, snuggling into him a little more.

 

“I know but I’m sure he’ll pronounce you fit enough to start easing yourself back into work. You’ve been moving a lot more freely in the last couple of days.” He consoled her with a quick nuzzle into her hair.

 

“If he says I’m all right, can we go out tonight? To celebrate?” Nell asked hating the hint of a childish whine that had crept into her voice. Maybe if she was cleared they could go to Dark Star, they hadn’t gone there for what felt like ages. Invite Sam and Issana out to celebrate, dance a little, have a drink or two, it would be fun. As much as she enjoyed nights in with Lazz, she was dying to see different coloured walls and do things other than sit on the couch and watch movies.

 

“Sure, anywhere you like as long as you take it easy. I’d hate to have to come back here twice in one day.” Lazz agreed with a teasing lilt. Nell shuddered at the idea of having to come back and see Dr Solus again after he pronounced her well because she had torn the scab off or worse. God, she could just imagine it. _‘Humans too impatient; must stay for month.’_

 

_______________

 

Lazz really hoped that his dig at Nell about having to come back to the hospital twice in one day would be enough to keep her from overdoing her first proper night out. Honestly, the idea of being in a club where she could be jolted or elbowed didn’t appeal to him but he could understand her wish to go out and celebrate. Even if he’d much prefer they just go out and have dinner together instead.

 

“Ah, patient here. Good. Thought mate might have killed you. Joke. Turians unusually patient and caring towards mates, more likely _you_ would kill him. Humans problematic.” Dr Solus rambled as he walked in the room.

 

The entire speech was finished before the door even finished swishing closed. Lazz laughed, unable to help himself and was rewarded with an elbow to the waist. For being so soft and squishy he had yet to figure out how Humans had such sharp elbows and knees.

 

“Hey! I have _not_ been that bad.” Nell exclaimed turning to pout at him before giggling when he just raised a brow plate at her. “Ok, so I may have been a _little_ difficult.” She conceded making him snort. All right, so she hadn’t been as bad as Dr Solus had warned him Humans could be but there had still been a few tantrums, the occasional bout of depression at being so bored and the rearranging of his kitchen. Not to mention hogging his omni-screen and generally being what she referred to as a _‘slug’_ , which he took to mean _‘someone to sits around the house all day and does nothing_. _’_  

 

Now that he thought about it, if it had been anyone but Nell, he wouldn’t have put up with it and they would have found themselves back in their own apartment. Actually, if anyone else had rearranged his kitchen he would have probably killed them. The only thing that had annoyed him about that whole thing was that it had been too early in the morning. As long as he didn’t have to hunt for his coffee cup a 0645 in the morning she could rearrange whatever she wanted.

 

“You keep telling yourself that, Nell.” Lazz muttered, rubbing his mandible over the shell of her ear in the way she liked to take the sting out of his words and make her do that little Turian hum thing he loved.

 

“I will.” She muttered, childishly sticking her tongue out at him before giving his mandible a quick kiss. “So, can I be cleared to go back to work now please?” Nell asked turning her attention back to Dr Solus. Spirits please don’t let him tell her no, Lazz prayed.

 

“Heart rate and temperature within acceptable levels. Blood test came back clean, no trace of infection. Good. Should be fine but need to check wound first. See healing progress before decide. Scan.” Dr Solus replied, coming towards the bed. “Shirt up must see.”

___________________

 

Nell leant back a little on the bed to give Dr Solus room to scan her abdomen. Thank god for Omni-tools, no cold hands, no x-rays, no pressure or stretches, just one quick scan and it was all over. Finally, there was light at the end of this long, boring tunnel and if it was an oncoming skycar someone was going to suffer. 

 

“Scab cracked, minor damaged sustained recently. Not good. Need to be more careful. Impatient. Internal injuries healed. Good to see. Only minor surface damage remaining. Excellent. Expected. Human durability and rapid healing helpful. Healing well. Satisfied.” Dr Solus explained quickly as he read off the data on his screen. Thank god. Wait… there was probably a catch, like no heavy lifting or dancing in the forest naked.

 

“So I can go back to work then?” Nell asked hesitantly. Please say yes, she hoped silently.

 

“Yes, should be fine. No heavy lifting till scabs fall off. Do not over do. Try not to get shot again, have been entertained enough for one year. Any other questions?”  He replied with a small smirk. Over doing and coming back was _so_ not in the plan. Not getting shot again was a little bit harder to promise… it wasn’t like anyone went out and thought _‘hey, I know what I’ll do today. I’m going to go out and get shot.’_ Smart ass Salarians.

 

“Yes, actually. We do have one question.” Nell answered hesitantly with a glance at Lazz as she wondered how to phrase the question they wanted to ask. Was it weird that she found the fact that they _even_ had to ask, mildly embarrassing? Oh well, might as well get it over with, like a Band-Aid. “We were wondering if you had any… I guess suggestions… about Human – Turian sex with a healing stomach wound?” Nell continued feeling absolutely ridiculous. Seriously, you are twenty-five, suck it up. If you’re old enough to do it, you’re old enough to ask about it, she self-criticised silently. 

 

“We’ve been worried about hurting her. Or rather I have. The cracked scab was my fault.” Lazz chimed in from beside her. The worried hum was back in his subvocals along with something that sounded suspiciously like an uncomfortable whine. Well good, at least she wasn’t the only one uncomfortable. Awkward situation was entirely awkward.

 

“Intercourse fine now. Watch plating on scabs. Will tear them off. Nothing too dexterous. Communication important. Will send files of positions potentially comfortable to Humans with stomach wounds. Previous test results show not allergic to each other. Obvious. Likely have noticed by now.” Dr Solus replied bringing up his Omni-screen again.

 

A few seconds later both their Omni-tools chimed with an incoming text package. Holy shit that was quick. Then again, Dr Solus seemed to do everything quick.

 

“Anything else?” He asked expectantly but distractedly.

 

“No we’re good, I think? Anything else you can think of Nell?” Lazz asked as he pulled himself off the bed and turned to her.

 

“No, I’m good. I can go back to work so I’m happy.” She replied slipping off the bed and extending her hand out to the doctor. “Thanks.”

 

“Welcome. Remember, no heavy lifting. Have a good day.” Doctor Solus replied giving her hand a quick shake before turning and leaving the room as quickly as he came in.

 

“Well that sucked, but on the bright side I get to go out and be a productive member of society again. I’ll phone Issana later and find out when she can roster me back in and see if she’s available tonight. God, I can’t wait. Will you dance with me?” Nell grinned, hooking her arm through his.

 

“How else am I going to keep you from being elbowed out there?” Lazz chuckled as they left the room.

________________

 

Some part of Nell was amazed that no one had robbed her apartment while she had been away. After all this was the neighbourhood for it, but no, the door was still locked and all her guns were still where she left them on the table. Personally Nell thought that her clothing and her weapons were the only things of value that she particularly owned; everything else was cheap and hastily bought. Vaguely, she remembered Lazz telling her that he had upgraded her security system while he was picking up her stuff. Wonderful, handsome Turian, a thief would have made a killing on the black market with her collection.

 

Everything was, unsurprisingly covered in a light coat of dust. It figured one of the first things she was going to have to do would be to fully clean her apartment. Ugh… maybe she could rope Lazz into helping. Cleaning for lack of better things to do was one thing, cleaning because the dust bunnies in your apartment breed like pre-genophage Krogan was another. At least she wasn’t moving back into her dusty apartment right this second; they were only here to pick up her makeup and an outfit for tonight.

 

What to wear? Nell wondered opening her wardrobe, fully aware that this would be the first time she would be dressing up since the alleyway and wanting to make the most of it. She owned _way_ too many clothes… Ok, narrow it down. A waistband sitting around the scab would probably be uncomfortable, so a dress. Now which one…

 

“What about this one?” Nell asked pulling out one of her 50’s style dresses. It was black with a sweetheart bust line and a classy lace overlay and neckline. More importantly the waist sat a little above her wound, so she wouldn’t have to worry about the seam rubbing her scab when she sat or moved around.

 

By the bored, put upon sigh from the bed behind her, anyone would have thought she’d been at this for hours rather than the ten minutes it had actually been. Though, if he hadn’t been here it probably would have been a half hour at least.

 

“Sure, but won’t it need those tall shoes you usually wear? Are they a good idea?” Lazz asked looking both uninterested and anxious at the same time when she turned around to show him the dress she’d picked.

 

Hmm, he had a point. Even though she rarely ever stumbled or fell in her heels, tonight would probably be the night she did. It would hurt like a bitch and Lazz would take her back to the hospital to check for tearing because he worried like that. Probably best not to risk it. Flats it was, good thing she had bought a couple of nice pairs just because.

 

“I have flat shoes that will go with this. It’s fine.” Nell dismissed. Flats were boring, too much like combat boots and they did nothing for her legs _but_ sacrifices were necessary to avoid another doctors visit. Nell tossed the dress unceremoniously on the bed and headed to her bedside table, if she was wearing flats; she was going to need some jewellery to jazz it up a bit.

 

Wait… what were these? Nell pondered as she looked at the black ball of folded up leather next her jewellery box. Did she own gloves? She was pretty sure she didn’t own gloves… wait these were Turian gloves. Didn’t she hear him mention to Sam a week or so ago that he’d misplaced his favourite gloves and he’d had to buy new ones because his spares were uncomfortable? Without really thinking Nell picked them up and threw them on the bed towards him.

 

“You left these here. We’ll take them with us. You like them right?” She explained trailing off and turning suddenly towards the sound of distressed Turian.

 

Oh god, what had she done now? This was bad. Not _‘He’s angry because he can’t find his coffee cup’_ bad but the _‘I just really upset him and I’m not sure how’_ bad. Lazz was now standing at the end of the bed with a look of something like horror on his face, if he’d been Human, Nell was sure he would be deathly pale. Oh, shit. And he was keening. Fuck.

 

Ok, think Nell. Everything was fine until you threw the gloves on the bed… Did she just tell him that she wanted him to keep his hands covered around her? Or was it something else? Damn Extranet and its lack of information about Turian relationships. Knowing the average Turian penis size was _not_ helpful in a situation like this or possibly ever but not the point, Nell lamented feeling panicked and frustrated.

 

“I get it. I’ll just leave; don’t worry about your stuff. I’ll have Sam drop it around tomorrow.” Lazz sighed out resignedly. It was hard to hear what he said over the devastated keening of his subvocals. He hated that, when his emotions got the best of him and he couldn’t control them like he thought he should. No, that wasn’t the important part…

 

“Wait, what?” Nell stammered feeling completely thrown for a loop. Sam would drop her stuff back? This was _way_ worse than she thought.

 

“Really Nellwyn, I get it. You don’t want me as your mate. I’m glad you’re better now, so I’ll just… go. Goodbye.” Lazz said dejectedly, not looking at her and heading to the door. He looked absolutely heartbroken. Mate? What? How did he come to that conclusion? 

 

“No.” She cried using her biotics to jump across the space between herself and the door, cutting him off before he had even taken two steps. Ow, that kind of hurt, she thought with a wince. “Wait, Lazz please. I don’t know what I did. I just pointed out that you left your gloves here and returned them, you liked those gloves. I heard you complain about it to Sam. I don’t understand how that was wrong. Didn’t we agree that if I crossed or was going to cross some kind of Turian cultural thing that you would stop me and explain it? Please don’t leave.” Nell begged him feeling like she was going to cry from confusion and panic.

 

“You were just returning them, not rejecting me as your mate?” Lazz asked hesitantly, trilling out his confusion. His mandibles were clenched tightly against his face but now his stance was wary rather than completely closed off. That was a start.

 

“Yes, just returning them. Now stop trying to leave and explain to me what I did and what it meant.” She demanded feeling a little calmer. Seriously, the Extranet sucked. Had Asari never had this problem before? Whatever she did should have been in the dos’ and don’ts’ of Turian interspecies relationships. Clearly she had just accidently dumped him. Ugh, this was such a nightmare; stupid lack of information.

 

Lazz continued to stand there for a moment longer before shaking his head and moving back to sit on the bed with an exhausted sigh. Cautiously, Nell moved to sit on the bed next to him, leaving a little bit of space between them so he wouldn’t feel smothered.

 

“Spirits, I’m an idiot. Of course you didn’t know.” Lazz admitted in a tone of self-derision, lowering his head into his hands. At least he appeared to be thinking clearly again. “I’m so sorry. It’s one of those mating customs that are purely instinctual, from before we were sentient. I’m not sure how to explain it properly.”

 

“Please try. I want to understand.” Nell coaxed, pulling his hands away from his face and giving them a squeeze.

 

“It’s weird and confusing. In some ways Humans are so similar, like how Sam takes his one night stands to his apartment rather than go to theirs. Though, that might just be a personal preference of his. For Turians the majority of one night stands happen at the male’s place. There are a few exceptions, of course. Other than the fact that I hadn’t had a female in my apartment for years and I wanted to take our relationship slow, the other reason I didn’t bring you over to mine straight away was I didn’t want to accidently send the wrong message. Courting mostly only begins when we’re invited into the female’s living space. To… um, see if she’s willing to accept us as a potential bond mate we will leave something of ours in her space. If she throws it out, returns it or leaves it outside, it’s a rejection and the courtship ends.” Lazz explained, pausing a few times to gather his thoughts or find the words he wanted.

 

Wow, Turians were so simple they were complicated.

 

“And that’s what I did, reject your courtship?” Nell queried trying to wrap her head around it. She had rejected him in the most fundamentally Turian way possible, no wonder he had freaked out.

 

“Yeah, I’m so sorry Nell. I should have realised you wouldn’t have understood what you did but I wasn’t thinking.” He apologised again, giving her a sheepish look.

 

“So if I gave you a draw in my room for your things, would that be me accepting your courtship?” Nell asked curious and eager to make up for her ignorant rejection of him. It also seemed the most logical way to prove her commitment to their relationship.

 

“Are you sure? I know you’re not Turian; I don’t want you to rush into anything just because my species does things differently. As long as I know you aren’t rejecting me, it’s enough.” Lazz questioned, obviously wanting reassurance that he wasn’t pushing her into anything she wasn’t ready for.

 

“We’re not rushing anything, really. Soon it will be strange if you haven’t left anything here. By Human dating standards, we’re about to start the _‘bouncing between apartments’_ stage of our relationship. Basically we’ll never be able to find anything we want again because it will be at one apartment or the other. It’s a major pain in the ass.” Nell reassured him smiling.

 

Lazz snorted before pulling her closer to him. “I think I’ve heard some Humans at work whine about that.”

 

“You ok now?” She asked pushing herself into his lap and wrapping her arms around his neck. If she ever met another Human dating a male Turian, she was going to warn them about this landmine.

 

“Yeah. I should have realised this might have been a problem when I felt compelled to leave something here in the first place. I’m really sorry.” He replied remorsefully, nuzzling his face into her neck.

 

“You know, I can probably think of a couple of ways you can make it up to me, if you like?” Nell suggested coyly trying to lighten the mood, stroking his neck lightly and feeling him shiver. His hide was always so sensitive.  

 

“Hmm, is that right?” Lazz purred into her shoulder as he stroked a talon up her spine before pulling her closer. Doctor had cleared her so it wasn’t like he could have any complaints. Damn that spot he was nuzzling always turned her on. True, she had always had an overly sensitive neck but his rough plating and mandibles made the attention feel divine.

 

“Yeah…” She mumbled pushing him back before pulling him into a kiss as her hands began the complicated work of undoing his shirt. God, how he even got this contraption on she would never know. Other than that one time she had walked in on him just getting into the shower, she had never seen him naked and she was eager to again now that there would be no complaints.

 

“Need a little help?” Lazz asked with a laugh when her hands fumbled on the clasps making her growl a little.

 

“Yeah, probably best if you want your shirt off some time before the end of the cycle.” Nell grumbled in reply.

 

The result was worth the effort it took to get off his lap. He was gorgeous, as she knew he would be. He was lean hard sinewy muscle and angled plating; his rough black plating was spider webbed with chips and cracks just like his face and crest, the dark grey hide over his arms, waist and hips was peppered with large and small silver scars.

 

“Hmm, pretty…” She mumbled appreciatively, stroking a hand down his keel bone. Knowing he needed reassurance but not being able to form a proper sentence.

 

“You’re strange.” Lazz replied, his neck looking a little blue as he began to gently pull her shirt up. At least her shirt was easy to remove. No tiny buttons to slip out of his talons.  

 

The last time he had seen her shirtless was in the hospital. God, she hoped his disinterest had just been poor timing and manners. Her feelings of self-consciousness only lasted long enough for him to pull the shirt over her head and drop it on the floor. Prying her eyes away from the distracting patterns of his body, she shivered slightly as Lazz drew a gentle talon over her scabbed wound before skimming it along the dip in her waist.

 

“You have a nice waist, so small and perfectly curved.” Lazz purred possessively making her heart jump in her chest, before looking back up into her eyes. Best compliment ever, she thought smiling and pulling him closer so she could press her forehead into his. “I don’t know where to touch you. Humans are all so different and the extranet and Solus’s documents weren’t much help. Some of the stuff I saw looked really uncomfortable.” He complained, with a little frustrated growl.

 

Aw, poor Lazz, she thought with a smile. Turians were pretty uniform in what turned them on and it had been one the few things she had been able to find on the extranet about them. But Humans were all different in what they liked, it took experimentation and communication.

 

“Hmm…” Nell hummed raking her nails down the curve of his waist, making him growl low in his chest. “I don’t know about others but for me, I like my neck being touched but you’ve probably figured that out already; my breasts, just not particularly the nipples and my clavicles. Everything else is good but those are the best.”

 

Lazz pulled back to look at her questioningly and she expected him to question why she wasn’t particularly turned on by her nipples being played with but he surprised her by asking. “What’s a clavicle?”

 

“It’s a fancy name for our collarbone.” She replied stroking her finger across the bone to show him.

 

“So, like this?” He growled coyly, dipping his head and running his long rough tongue along the bone she had just caressed. Nell couldn’t have held back the low moan he caused, even if she had wanted to. “I’ll take that as a yes then.” Lazz chuckled. Damn he sounded so smug.

 

Pushing him back onto the bed, Nell straddled his hips again before reaching around to unclasp her bra and pull it off with a little sigh of contentment. Lazz’s hands automatically went to explore her newly exposed breasts. Ok, so still wasn’t as good as him teasing her neck but it was still amazing, Nell though with a little moan. His hands were large, roughly textured and very warm on her soft skin.

 

“They’re so soft and squishy.” Lazz commented making her laugh. She watched him as he rolled her breast one way and then the other, studying them with a confused flare of his mandibles. “I can kind of see what the fuss is about now. They move when you breathe and laugh, it’s weird.”

 

“They jiggle too.” Nell smirked as she shimmied her chest a little to demonstrate for him.

 

“Weird.” Was all Lazz said before ducking down and flicking his long tongue over her pebbled nipple. Yeah, that still didn’t do anything for her, Turian tongue or not, Nell thought making a noise of protest and moving away from him a little. 

 

“So anything you really like?” She asked thinking it was time to torment the big kitty a little and take his attention away from her nipples. God, watching his reaction to his first blow job was going to be fun. In fact she was really looking forward to it, since he had never been with an Asari and Turians couldn’t do it with all those teeth.

 

“There’s that spot under my fringe, but I think I love that nibbling thing you do on my neck the most.” He uttered with a low growl as she ran her nails up his neck before raking them over the spot he had mentioned. “Spirits, Nell. Are you trying to kill me?” Lazz whined over the loud growl of his subvocals.

 

“Maybe, is it working?” Nell snickered coyly before biting down on his neck and sucking hard enough to leave a hicky on a Human. When she looked at it all he had was a light blue mark that was already starting to fade.

 

Lazz’s only reply was to groan in the back of his throat. Oh this was going to be great, she thought as she eased down his body to his waist; her fingers trailing over the many intersecting plates of his chest.

 

“How does this feel?” She asked running a finger between one of the gaps in his plating. There was so much of him to explore, all his buttons she didn’t know yet.

 

“Strange.” Lazz replied, leaning back on his elbows to watch what she was doing.

 

“So, it’s just the large patches of hide that feel good?” Nell questioned, moving to caress the hide along his waist instead, making him purr in pleasure and arch a little into her hand. 

 

“Yeah. You don’t have talons so I can’t feel anything through my plates and the gaps just feel weird.” Fair enough, Nell thought leaning down to nip at the hide over his abdomen. There wasn’t anything they could do about her lack of claws but there was plenty she could do instead that she thought he might enjoy. 

 

Nell began stroking the thick scarred hide of his waist, alternating her touches between soft caresses, rough scratches and lots of nibbling. She could feel his rumbling growls and purrs, hear his little prayers to the Spirits at her attention as she made her slow way down his waist towards his hips.

 

“May I?” She asked tugging the waist of his pants to show what she was asking.

 

“Spirits, yes.” Lazz growled rather predictably. At least the buckles on his pants were easy to figure out, Nell sighed with relief as she made quick work of his pants and began easing them over his angled hips and down to pool around his spurs.

 

If she hadn’t already looked up Turian biology, Nell thought she might have asked something incredibly silly, like where his penis was. She was however surprised and slightly dismayed to find that his protective groin plates had only just started to spread. Weird, it was obvious he was enjoying her attention but maybe she wasn’t doing it right.

 

“Am I not doing this right?” Nell asked shyly, tracing the plated ridge of his hip with her fingers before skimming them over the patch of hide between his hips and the plating on his thighs. It was such a different shape to hers, all hard lines and ridged edged plates rather than the soft curve of a Human’s. Dr Solus’s warning about chafing immediately sprung to mind.

 

“No, you are. See the plates are already starting to spread, just need a little more coaxing.” He reassured her, taking on of her hands in his and using it to stroke firmly down the seam between his plates. “Here, like this.”

 

Nell watched with a small pleased smile as his plates spread open with each stroke of her fingers, while listening to Lazz’s groans become peppered with panting. There was a rush of slick lubricant as his cock burst forth from his behind his fully spread plates and into her hand. Just like all the pictures she had seen on the extranet it was large and blue, the same blue has his tongue but more vibrant. It was wide at the base before tapering up to the head, curving gently upwards with soft dark blue plating on the underside.

 

Oh this was going to be great, Nell thought. Now where to start…

 

After a moment’s pause, Nell decided that she wanted to see how the soft under plates felt against her tongue. In one long stroke she licked him hard from thick base to thin tip. They were as soft as they looked, merely adding texture, like the ribbing on a condom. He tasted salty and yet ever so slightly metallic, how a freshly minted Earth coin smelt, interesting and yet just so purely him. Judging by the amusingly strangled growl type noise Lazz let out, he had enjoyed the first swipe of her tongue.

 

Nell took the head of his cock into her mouth, after one last swipe of her tongue. He growled deep in the back of his throat as she flicked his sensitive tip with her tongue a few times before sucking roughly. Lazz’s hips began to gently thrust up in time with her hand stroking him, almost as if he’d been getting blow jobs all his life or had watched a hell of a lot of Human porn.

 

“Spirits, Nell.” Lazz whined when she removed her hand and nibbled up his length, her teeth scraping as much as she could around his girth before soothing the skin with long swipes of her tongue. God he was so into it, the noises he was making were going straight to her head and her pussy. His taste growing on her, becoming more familiar with each pass and each pleasure filled purr or growl, it would almost be worth it just get him off now and pick up where they left off later… almost.

 

Taking him as deep as she could into her mouth without gagging, Nell bobbed her head up and down along his length, timing it with the renewed stroking of her hand while she drew long scratches down his thighs with her other one. When his taste changed, becoming stronger, thicker and muskier, Nell knew it was time to stop. Reluctantly, with one last lick of his length, she withdrew her mouth from him with a little sigh.

 

“So, are you dead yet?” She teased gently, crawling back up his body and pulling him forwards for a deep kiss. Nell let loose a squeal of surprised laughter as Lazz suddenly flipped her over onto the bed, her legs clinging to his hips for support.

 

“Spirits, I didn’t hurt you did I? “ Lazz asked, jerking away from her with a trill of regret and worry to check her wound.

 

“Just a little twinge, that’s all, nothing to worry about.” Nell reassured him, stroking his mandible gently and bringing his focus back to her. There was no way in hell she was going to let this damned wound spoil the mood, besides her mattress was soft and it had really been no more than a twinge. “What if I wanted to be on top?” She pouted mischievously.

 

Lazz gave her a long look, as if trying to decide whether to press the issue or not before sighing. “You’re bed won’t work with my carapace or fringe, at least not without special Turian pillows, which we don’t have. So I guess that means I’m on top today.” He explained with a smug twitch of his mandibles and that sexy rumble that always made her heart clench.

 

Stupid non-Turian friendly furniture, as if her injury wasn’t putting enough restrictions on them already, Nell thought sulking a little. They were going to have to invest in those pillows soon or he wouldn’t be able to spend the night comfortably.

 

“Shame, I was looking forward to riding you but now I guess you’ll have to wait.” Nell purred playfully, raking her nails around his waist.

 

“I can think of worse things. Now after I finish getting my pants off because you were too lazy to deal with my spurs, I’m going to try that Human reciprocation thing I’ve seen.” Lazz grumbled, pulling himself off her and sitting on the bed to finish taking his clothing off.

 

“It’s not my fault your clothing is ridiculously complicated.” Nell snorted in amusement, leaning down to begin to take her boots off.

 

“Says the species that likes rows of tiny buttons and pants you have to peel off.” He shot back, pulling one of his pant legs off.

 

“Speaking of peeling pants off. These jeans will come off quicker if you pull them over my feet.” She smirked, waving her feet in the air a little as she eased the waist over her hips. Taking skinny jeans off was in no way a sexy look, particularly when she was already getting hot and bothered. At least her underwear was nice, not a matching set like she would normally have worn or a sexy G-string but at least it wasn’t boring black cotton. They were a purple and black embroidered mesh that went with one of her other bras.

 

Once his pants were off, Lazz stood with a resigned sigh that made her giggle. He was a sexy figure, or at least she thought so; his vibrant blue cock bobbing from between his plates as he moved to take the ankles of her jeans between his hands and began to gently pull them off. That thing really was a work of art, the perfect angle that Human cocks almost never had or at least none she had ever seen.

 

So how’s it hanging? In a perfect upwards curve, thanks for asking, Nell thought with a choked snicker. Really Nell, dick jokes… God, she was cock drunk.

 

“Something you’d like to share?” Lazz asked, looking confused and holding up her jeans like they had just done a trick.

 

“A really lame dick joke, I’ll tell you later.” She laughed wrapping her hand around his cock and giving it a firm pump, feeling a little embarrassed at her own immaturity.

 

Swatting her hand away Lazz eased her backwards onto the bed, crawling after her as she pulled herself up towards her pillows. “I’ll finish if you keep doing that. It’s my turn now.” He purred covering her mouth with a heated kiss, his tongue dancing against hers before pulling back.

 

“Spirits Nell, your arousal is driving me crazy…” He muttered making his slow way down her neck with gentle nips and flicks of his tongue. Her whole body felt like it was on fire, the feeling of his plates was everywhere. “… Been driving me crazy for a while now…” Lazz continued in a rough growl, licking along the line of her clavicle. Oh god she loved that feeling so much.

 

Nell considered mumbling something along the lines of how she could smell his too, when she was sitting on his lap or kissing him but her brain seemed to have whited out. So she contented herself with scraping her nails around his waist before trailing them up his spine and over his carapace.

 

She hissed a little in complaint when his tongue again flicked over her nipples. God she was never going to be into that. “You really don’t like that, do you?” Lazz commented moving away from them to play with the rest of her breast.

 

“It feels weird, more annoying than pleasurable. Maybe like how my fingers in between your plates feel… Don’t know, just never liked it.” Nell tried to explain in between moans. How do you explain why you don’t like something when the answer is _‘I just don’t’_?

 

“But the rest is fine?” He asked, running his long tongue along the underside of her right breast. Turian tongues were magical, if this was how it felt on her breasts what the hell was it going to feel like on her clit.

 

“Oh god, yes! That’s the only thing I know I really don’t like.” She panted, clawing at the sensitive skin around his neck.

 

Lazz made a little grunt of acceptance as he moved to mimic his actions on the other breast before moving to nibble, nuzzle and lick his way down her stomach. He ran his tongue lightly around the scab on her stomach; it almost felt like a loving kiss on something that had caused her so much discomfort and annoyance, before moving to scrape his mouth plates over her belly button. Another part of Human anatomy he had found odd, at least she hadn’t had to try and explain it to him, Sam having done that job within his first few months on the Citadel.

 

Nell hadn’t known how much she enjoyed having attention paid to her hipbones until Lazz had made his slow way over there. She could feel his smug smirk against her skin as she moaned loudly and arched against him as he scrapped his rounded talons over them. 

 

It felt like an eternity before she felt his claws finally slip under the waist of her panties, his mandible tracing along the edge where fabric met skin. Nell tilted her hips up so he could ease them down her thighs and over her legs, before she kicked them onto the floor with the rest of their clothing.

 

“I thought Humans had hair down here?” Lazz observed sounding confused and a little disappointed. Aw, poor disappointed Turian with a hair fetish… He would just have to get over it. 

 

“We do, we can just choose to have it removed.” Nell explained, coming up onto her elbows to watch him trace the area with the pad of his finger.

 

Sometimes it was easy for her to forget that hair was normally there, all her friends in the Alliance had either shaved, waxed or lazered it all off in the name of comfort. God, it seemed like forever ago that she had waxed it off as a teenaged dare. Home waxing kits _could_ and probably _should_ be considered a form of torture but that hadn’t prevented her from continuing it, regrowth was itchy as hell. Nell had made the decision to permanently remove it, as well as her leg and underarm hair at the first financially available moment. Pubic hair was just such an odd concept now, but of course that wouldn’t make sense to most of the other species.

 

“Why would you remove it?” He asked looking genuinely curious. Later he would probably ask _how_ body hair was removed but for now she supposed the _why_ would do for him. The look on his face when she described waxing to him later would be priceless, a species that was genetically incapable of growing hair at all would be horrified by the lengths some Humans went to in order to remove it and the perceived pain involved. 

 

“Personal preference, I prefer how it looks and the fact that it no longer itches.” She replied hoping that answered his question enough for him to return to what he was doing or had planned on doing. Lazz gave a Human like shrug of his shoulders to show he no longer cared and slipped his finger down between the lips of her pussy, causing her to moan low in her throat and flop back down onto the pillow.

 

The first flick of his tongue between her lips had her bucking up into his mouth, Nell didn’t think she’d ever been so sensitive or turned on. It wasn’t going to take her long to come at all if he kept up like that. His talons lightly scratched the inside of her thighs as began to explore her with his tongue, alternating between long rough licks and quick flicks.

 

Nell had never considered herself a particularly loud lover, it wasn’t something you did in service or in dorm rooms but she practically screamed her growl of pleasure when she felt his tongue make its way inside her as a finger scrapped over her clit. Oh god, her brain was going to turn to mush.

 

Lazz removed his tongue from inside her with what sounded like a pleased rumble and flicked it over her clit. Yep, definitely brain mush… Nell thought moaning and arching a little against his mouth, seeking more friction as his finger traced downwards between her labia.

 

“Ow.” She yelped suddenly shocking both of them. Ok rounded talons or not that was uncomfortable. Lazz bolted up to sitting position with a trill of distress in a heartbeat. Crap… Nell thought sitting up and pulling his forehead to hers in order to comfort him. “It’s all right; your nails are just too long to go up there.” She explained softly, stroking his mandibles and nuzzling against him. Lazz relaxed a little against her with a sigh.

 

“It didn’t hurt too badly, did it?” He asked concerned pulling back to look her in the eyes.

 

“Not really, just kind of shocked me.” Nell admitted truthfully. Her brain was still reeling from the sudden change of mind numbing pleasure to sudden discomfort.

 

“Well, I can file them down further later or wear talon caps but those are at home.” Well that was inconvenient, she thought with a frown. Couldn’t really be helped though and they were bound to run into some incompatibility at some point and at least this was minor. 

 

“You were enjoying what I was doing before, right, with my tongue? I can just do that.” Lazz suggested with a smug flick of his mandibles as he nudged her to lie back down. Oh yes, Nell thought, she had definitely enjoyed that thing with his tongue. Yay, long thin Turian tongues…

 

Lazz flicked his long tongue over her clit a few times as he came to rest on the bed between her thighs again; all thoughts of discomfort and disappointment at not being able to feel his fingers inside her melted away as she began to moan in pleasure again. She let loose another strangle moan as his tongue entered inside her again, the rough pads of his fingers returning to play with her clit. Oh sweet, sweet friction…

 

“Oh god, right there.” Nell moaned her brain whiting out in pleasure; just a little more… maybe a little harder. Distantly she could hear Lazz give a pleased chuckle as his fingers increased their pressure, beginning to rotate little circles on her increasingly sensitive clit as her body began to tense. So close…

 

Moving her hips in time with the thrusts of his tongue and the circling of his fingers, Nell felt her body go as tense as a bow string for a moment before it fell finally and wonderfully apart. Nell growled low in her throat as she came shuddering around his tongue, panting and moaning loudly as her muscles contracted and spasmed in sweet release.

 

She felt as weak as an over boiled noodle by the time Lazz crawled her way back up her body and pressed his head to hers with a sweet self-satisfied hum. Smug bastard, Nell thought wrapping her shaky arms around him and pulling him closer.

 

“That was amazing; I can see why Human males do it. You ok?” Lazz preened softly, nuzzling against her before pulling her into a kiss. She could taste herself on him, damn if that wasn’t hot.  

 

“Yes it was. I’m good, just can’t quite feel my legs yet.” Nell breathed sounding as breathless as she felt.

 

“Do you need a minute?” He chuckled. He was _way_ too pleased with himself.

 

“No, I think I’m good to go.” She replied taking a deep breath and planting her feet on either side of his hips. Oh, good her legs were working again, still a little shaky but that was promising.

 

Lazz kissed her roughly, his long tongue twining with hers as he lifted himself further off her so he could snake a hand between them. She moaned into his mouth and thrust her hips against him as she felt the head of his cock run along the seam of her pussy before coming to rest at her opening. Ever so slowly he eased himself into her with a sigh.

 

Nell wrapped her legs around his hips, careful to rest her soft thighs on his hide rather than his plates, to hold him in place to give her body a much needed moment to adjust. It didn’t hurt, she was too wet and turned on for that but she could feel her muscles stretching out to accommodate him. Oh god, he was huge, Nell thought as she threw her head back and moaned at the feel of him.

 

“Spirits, you’re so tight. I’m not hurting you, am I?” Lazz asked pressing himself gently into her further with a growl.

 

“Not at all. Slow to start please… Need to adjust.” Nell stated breathily trailing her fingers over the exposed hide on his back. 

 

Slowly, oh so slowly Lazz began to thrust into her rotating his hips a little to give her extra friction and throw off the rhythm. Oh, if this was what their first time felt like, when they were still learning each other’s bodies their sex life was going to be amazing. The plates on his hard cock were quickly reducing her to a mind melted puddle of pleasure.

 

Nell braced her feet in the mattress and thrust up hard into him, startling a rough growl from his throat. Lazz moved back on his haunches to change the angle of his thrusts, obviously sensing she wanted more control. Raking her nails down his waist she watched as his blue cock slid in and out of her. That was fucking hot as hell…

 

The only problem was with the change of angle her thighs could no longer sit on his hide and they were now rubbing up against the very hard and rough plating of his outer thighs. It wouldn’t take long before they were a burning stinging red and would completely ruin the mood. Chafing sucked…

 

“Put my ankles on your shoulders.” Nell muttered in between pants sighing with relief when her tender skin was lifted away from his plating. Hopefully this position would work, the only other alternative she could think of at the moment with her half melted brain was doggy and she wanted to watch him.

 

Oh, right there, she thought. Other than the slight rubbing on the back of her ankles, which was easily fixed by placing the flat of her feet on his shoulders, this was perfect; he was hitting all the right spots.

 

“Not going to last long in this position, Nell or at all really. Please tell me you’re close…” Lazz practically whined out through his subvocals. 

 

“Need… on clit or I can’t…” She panted out, trying to explain what she needed. No matter how wonderful he felt or how close she was sitting to the edge, Nell knew that she just wouldn’t be able to tumble over it without that little bit of extra friction. It wouldn’t take her long at all once she had that…

 

Lazz slid a hand down her leg, rubbing his mandible along her shin lovingly as he did so. He was a little clumsy with his rhythm and pressure, but oh if she slight roughness of his hide wasn’t going to be exactly what she needed, Nell had no idea what would be.

 

As her pressure began to build and peak, pushing her closer and closer to falling over the edge, Lazz’s pants and growls became louder, and his thrusting more erratic. Nell could feel his cock begin to twitch and swell as he began to come. The hand still on her leg clenched in pleasure as he let loose a moaning growl, his mandibles spread wide. His off time thrusts were the final straw needed to push her over the edge, with a moaned yell, Nell thrust up into him as her vision blacked out for a moment. It felt like she was going to shatter and fall apart around him as waves of pleasure washed over her.

 

Oh, god she had needed that so badly after two weeks of living with him and nothing but kisses and light petting. 

 

Lazz continued to thrust, drawing out her orgasm and possibly his own until she laughed and pushed him gently away, now completely over sensitised and completely dead. Forget not having legs, her entire spine had just turned to jelly. Giving one last sated huff Lazz withdrew and flopped down on his side next to her, nuzzling his head into her shoulder with a loud vibrating purr.

 

“How’s your stomach?” He asked after a few minutes of silence as they both caught their breath and just enjoyed the afterglow and closeness.

 

“Feels fine so far, mind you I can’t feel much right now.” She replied with an exhausted little giggle. Figures that would be the first thing he asked about. Lazz’s priorities: have amazing sex, ask about wound instead…

 

“Good.” Lazz purred, trailing a lazy talon over her shoulder and down her arm. Oh no, she could feel herself drifting off to sleep.

_________________

 

Lazz could barely believe what had happened. His stupid instincts had taken over, completely overriding all his higher brain functions for just one lousy moment when she had given him his spirits damned glove back, more than enough time for him to make an idiot of himself and nearly ruin their relationship. Nell had assumed he had forgotten them, not an unreasonable assumption for someone who wasn’t Turian. It was hard to tell what he needed to explain to her, with the species difference neither one of them were sure what would apply to their relationship. It was why they had agreed that he would explain them as they came up.

 

Of course his brain hadn’t registered that, it had also forgotten all about how she was currently living with him and had defaulted to _‘she’s rejecting me from her space’_ and _‘she doesn’t want me as her mate’_. Spirits, he was pathetic. At least she had been patient with him even if she had been confused and a little bit hurt; forcing him to explain it to her instead of allowing him to run away. Spirits, she had even given him a draw to store whatever he wanted in her apartment and explained that they would be entering into a stage where it wouldn’t be uncommon for him to leave things at hers.

 

“Are you all right?” Nell asked quietly from the circle of his arms after a few long relaxing minutes of silence. She sounded sleepy and comfortable, which was probably not a good thing since they no doubt had to leave soon if she wanted time to pack, get back to his and then get ready for a night out.

 

“Yeah, just not ready to get up yet.” Lazz purred as continuing to stroke a lazy talon over her bare shoulder. Stupid plans, Lazz thought petulantly over the rumbling purr that had not abated in his chest. All he wanted to do was go for round two and try and forget how ridiculous he had been earlier.

 

“Neither but we’ll have to at some point, I know this bed can’t possibly be comfortable for you. Ugh why did we arrange a night out tonight?” She groaned rolling towards him and burrowing her face into his neck. Spirits, why had she suggested they go out to celebrate her being cleared to go back to work? Why on Palaven had he agreed? Now they had to go out when all he wanted to do was greedily have her to himself… but he had promised and she needed it.

__________________

 

Dark Star was loud and crowded when they walked in, his arm casually around her waist and her wound protected by the shield of his body. It was worth it to see the way Nell’s face lit up with a smile when she saw Issana wave at her from across the bar. Hmm, someone who managed to be earlier than Nell to something, Lazz thought as they navigated the clustering of patrons towards her boss. Sam would be at least ten minutes late, knowing him. 

 

Nell looked fantastic, it felt like it had been so long since he saw her dressed as she normally would and there was a sparkle to her eyes that had been lacking over the last couple of weeks. Still… what was that Human saying… that dress would look better on his floor?

 

“Free at last huh?” Issana called as they came up to her. They hadn’t seen much of the petit purple Asari, only once at the hospital and twice at his apartment, thankfully she hadn’t come bearing flowers. Of course the owner of a store, down one staff member would have been busy.

 

“Yes finally. I can’t wait till tomorrow, thank you so much for giving me a half day on such short notice.” Nell replied pulling Issana into a loose hug.

 

“Of course, we’ve missed you. We have so many new items for you to look through but we’ll discuss that tomorrow.” Issana stated giving Nell a gentle hug in return before pulling away from her and turning to him. “Good to see you again Lazz. Now, first round of drinks are on me.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this was a long chapter and POV wise it's very uneven but i hope everyone enjoyed it. Smut is apparently not my thing so i ended up giving up on writing hot steamy romantic sex and just went with what i think sex in a loving relationship actually is. As usual please let me know your thoughts on the chapter, considering how long its been since the last one i am mostly concerned about flow.


	13. Blood is Thicker than Water

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parental visits are fun... not.

Lazz walked into the docking bay of the latest star ship he was working on with a heavy sigh and ten minutes later than he was comfortable with. It had been a crazy morning and work hadn’t even started yet. This bouncing between apartments thing sucked just as much as he had been led to believe it would and it hadn’t even been two months yet. Nell hadn’t been kidding when she had warned him that they would never be able to find anything ever again…

 

“Hey man, what happened this time? Couldn’t find your gloves again?” Sam asked with one of those annoying smirks that said he was enjoying this way too much.

 

“Haha, funny. Nell and I are moving in together.” Lazz explained with another sigh. Ok, so he was happy about it but Spirits he wished it hadn’t happened the way it did. Your mate screaming _‘that’s it we are moving in together, I can’t fucking take this anymore’_ at 0600ish in the morning while biotically flinging things around the bedroom because she couldn’t find the lipstick that went with her dress wasn’t quite how he had envisioned the conversation going.

 

They were going to need a bigger apartment…

 

“So I take it, this wasn’t a calm conversation then?” Sam laughed. Well, that was an understatement of the cycle but not something he would be sharing with his friend. Thank the Spirits, no more having to go back for things early in the morning, no misplacing things, morning yelling or nearly being late for work and thank every Spirit everywhere that this stage of Human courtship was over.

__________________________

 

Nell stood in the kitchen in a singlet and boy short pajama pants making coffee while Lazz was in the shower. They had been living in their new apartment on Zakera for about two weeks now. Unlike their previous places, this one was a spacious two bedroom with a small balcony that over looked the rest of the ward. Finally enough room for both of them with no bouncing or packing. All their tech and weapons, that had once cluttered their respective dining room tables, were now banished to the work benches set up in the spare room.

 

Most of the furniture was Lazz’s, except for a few items they had bought together but it looked like a home and she loved it.

 

Today their plan was to go and compete in Armax again. The first time had been so much fun and they were both excited to go again. Learning to work as a team in a hostile situation had been amazing, Lazz’s tech skills meshed well with her biotic abilities. He watched her back, which was nice and she hadn’t been forced to overextend her biotics because the enemy broke through their defensive line. The bonus of the day had been the fact that they had gotten a fairly decent score for their first time.

 

A sudden loud knock at the door startled Nell out of her pre-coffee musings. Were they expecting anyone this early? She wondered curious as she darted into the spare room to grab her pistol. Nell spared a moment to check the heat sink before exiting the room and crossing the dining room to the door. Give a girl a chance to get to the door, why don’t you? She thought annoyed as the loud rapping started up again. What, did they expect her to just teleport?

 

Tossing the gun into her left hand, she unlocked the door and yanked it open. Well, shit… Standing in the doorway were two haughty looking Turians, one male and one female. The male was tall, taller than Lazz by at least half a head, with deer brown plating that did little for the green in both his eyes and colony markings. The female was smaller, fine and delicate looking in comparison with severe brown eyes and black plating. Her hide was a taupe brown and her colony markings were an off white.

 

Yay unexpected parental visits… fuck my life, Nell internally winced. On a scale of this to thresher maws she would have definitely preferred the thresher; at least she could shoot that.

 

The awkward disapproving silence was deafening. Nell was unsure who disapproved more, her because unexpected visits were so _fun_ , or them because a Human had just answered the door to what they surely thought was their sons apartment. Well, there was probably no getting rid of them now.

 

“Please come in.” She ventured, stepping back to allow them to pass into the small hallway that connected to the dining room.

 

“Where is Lazzus?” His mother asked. No introductions or apologies for just turning up. Hell, she might as well have come straight out with _‘what are you doing in my son’s apartment’_. Oh, today was going to be great. She really needed coffee. Nell met the eyes of the male Turian and saw him give a tiny shrug, looked like it wasn’t just Lazz who had learnt some Human gestures.

 

“He’s in the shower. Please come in and sit down. I’ll let him know you’re here,” Nell replied, gesturing to the dining table as she closed the door and squeezed past them. Oh, well done Nell, just gesture with the gun why don’t you? Why not make it worse by leaping across the room with biotics…

 

Deciding dumping the gun back in the spare room was the best option, Nell knocked on the back room door.

 

“What’s wrong?” Lazz asked taking one look at her expression in the mirror and turning around.

 

“Your parents are here.” She told him flatly as she reached out and pulled his forehead to hers. “Do they usually just show up like this out of the blue?”

 

“No, last time they told me they were coming, mind you that was years ago now. I’m sorry, Nell; I would have told you if I had known they were coming.” Lazz groaned, his subvocals shrilling out in annoyance.

 

“Shh, I know you would have, it’s ok. Hopefully they’re not staying long.” Nell reassured him gently before giving a mock shudder and turning sarcastic. “Now all we need is for my dad to show up and we’ll have the xenophobic family reunion from hell.”

 

Oh god, I hope I didn’t just jinx us, she winced internally. She really needed to stop saying things like that, although if that happened they’d be on the first available ship to Omega. Or Geth space.

“Spirits, please don’t say things like that.” Lazz admonished jokingly as he rubbed her arms with that wonderfully comforting purr.

 

“Please don’t leave me alone with them for long.” She requested seriously. If this meeting went anything like the vid call where she told her father she was seeing a Turian, it was going to be awful. They’d probably heard about it somewhere, the galaxy _really_ wasn’t that big. Actually that was probably why they were here… either to get him to see reason or alienate her into leaving him. One perhaps last ditch effort, after all moving in together was a serious thing for Turians, more so than for Humans. Maybe putting off breaking the news wasn’t such a good idea.

 

“I’ll get dressed quickly, I promise.” Lass assured her, sliding his mandible along her cheek.

 

“Thanks. I love you.” Nell replied giving him a quick kiss.

 

“Love you too.” He smirked, that comforting purr of his dipping into that low rumble she could no longer hear but could feel. It warmed and comforted her in a way nothing else could and never failed to make her heart skip a beat. The Turian for _‘I love you’_ managed to convey somehow everything the words lacked. It was sad in a way, that she couldn’t give him that; that warm not sound that was just… everything, all she had was the words and whatever little gestures she could throw in but of course he never minded.

 

Nell gave him one last forehead press with a pleased little sigh and left the bathroom.

 

_“…He wouldn’t choose a Human over the Hierarchy…”_

_“Let it go, he’s moved in with her. The Human is his mate…”_

_“… Absolutely not…”_

 

The hushed argument stopped abruptly when Nell closed the bathroom door louder than necessary. Oh boy was his mother going to try her patience, at least his father sounded suitably resigned to the whole thing. That was a decent start to them getting along.

 

“Lazz will be right out in a minute, he’s just getting dressed. Please make yourselves at home.” She stated politely as the rounded the corner. It would be best at the moment to pretend she hadn’t heard anything.

 

“How do you like the new apartment?” Lazz’s father asked into yet another few moments of uncomfortable silence. It would be nice if she knew his name, maybe it was a Turian thing, having to wait to be introduced. That or they _really_ didn’t like her.

 

“It’s finally starting to look like a real home.” Nell replied cheerfully, pausing to shoot the female a glare when she gave a disapproving click. Well, at least someone else was trying to be polite and not start the whole meeting on the wrong foot.

 

“Sorry about that. Mum, dad, I would like you to meet my mate Nellwyn Greene.” Lazz began coming around the corner to stand beside her. He growled when his mother gave a soft whistle of protest, actually growled. God, she was kind of proud of him for that. “Nell, this is my father Kaesrius and my mother Cicetia.” He continued slipping his arm around her waist and pulling her closer.

 

He was firmly marking his territory and Nell hoped that Cicetia would back the hell off.

 ____________________________

 

Lazz’s good mood was well and truly gone by the time Nell had practically slammed the bathroom door closed. If he hadn’t already known his Spirits damned mother was going to be an issue, the tail end of that conversation had more than confirmed it. After all, when was she not, Lazz thought with a growl.

 

Snapping the last clasp of his shirt closed with a low snarl, he turned and headed for the kitchen. Did she really think he couldn’t hear her disapproving whistles through the walls? Did she really think at this point that Nell wouldn’t be able to recognise the sound? Or did she just not care? Funny how when that sound was directed at his fringe it made him cringe inside but now that it was directed at his mate it just made his blood boil. Where were a group of Mercs to shoot when you need some, or a Geth invasion on the Citadel? Spirits, he was not looking forward to this…

 

“Sorry about that. Mum, dad, I would like you to meet my mate Nellwyn Greene.” He began coming around the corner and into the kitchen, knowing full well that neither of his parents would have considered introducing themselves and Nell would be worried about breaking a Turian custom. When his mother gave a predicted whistle of condemnation, Lazz couldn’t have prevented the growl of warning that escaped him even if he had wanted to. He pulled Nell against his side and slipped his hand around her waist in a show of possessiveness, his subvocals dropping down to the low rumbling Humans couldn’t hear that Turian’s reserved for their mates, as he decided to continue as if nothing had happened. His point hopefully made. “Nell, this is my father Kaesrius and my mother Cicetia.”

 

He was pleased when his father politely inclined his head towards Nell in greeting, his subvocals disapproving but resigned. What with Turian – Human relationships being practically unheard of and the fact that his father had fought in the relay 314 incident that was probably the best he could hope for.

 

“So what brings you to the Citadel?” Nell asked with what he knew was false cheerfulness, leaning into him a little. Leave it to her to ask the question looming over both of them. If this was just because hadn’t visited in 3 years and wanted to see him with had nothing to do with the fact that he had just moved in with his Human mate, he was a Volus.

 

“We heard you were seeing a Human, the news of a Turian – Human couple on the Citadel has reached Palaven. We came to meet her…” Lazz’s father began calmly, a hint of disapproval rumbling in his chest before he was cut off.

 

“And to put an end to this foolishness…” His mother chimed in with a shrill screech. Ah, there it was, Lazz winced as he felt Nell tense up in his arms; although if it was from the pitch hurting her limited and yet oddly sensitive Human hearing or because she was becoming angry; probably both.

 

“What foolishness would that be mother?” Lazz asked in mock innocence as his subvocals growled out a low warning. Spirits knew if he had to choose, he was choosing Nell.

 

“What foolishness? What foolishness? How dare you even ask that! Has living on the Citadel caused you to completely forget your duty to the Hierarchy? Of all the species in the galaxy you had to take a Human as a mate. How could you do this to us? First you destroy our family’s reputation with that failed mission and now this! Do you have any idea how hard we had to work while you flouted your duty living on the Citadel? The least you could do is choose a respectable mate.” His mother began, venting out all her perceived frustrations without, as usual, any care for his feelings or wishes.

 

“Now Cicetia, you know the Hierarchy ruled that the accident wasn’t actually our son’s fault, there was a full enquiry into the matter and it was discovered that our Intel had been faulty. There was no way for him to know that was an ambush, and he would hardly have prevented his injuries being so extensive.” Kaesrius interjected trying to defend Lazz a little against his mother’s onslaught of his failures.

 

“That’s no excuse for completely abandoning his duties to go play with Spaceships. He’s a Combat Engineer, his fault or not but had the ambush not happened he would have been promoted to Major. No one’s going to trust him to command a squad now but he still could have found a way to regain his honour in a more suitable way.” Cicetia snapped back nastily making him cringe. The most shameful event in his career and she had a way to making it sound like he had done it to spite her. Was it really necessary for her to throw his demotion in his face like that? Never mind the dig she made at his fringe.

 

“Oh and what way would be acceptable to you, since clearly being one of the best Ship Engineers on the Citadel isn’t good enough?” Nell challenged giving his waist a comforting squeeze, her blue eyes flashing with anger… or was that biotics. The note of pride in her voice under the anger did a great deal to soothe the hurt caused by his dear sweet mother.

 

“A guard in the Prison Division would have gone a long way to restoring his credibility, or if he wanted to use his Engineering skills to benefit our species the research and development division would have been sufficient. But I _suppose_ , if he absolutely _had_ to be a Ship Engineer he could have at least chosen to work on the home world or one of the colonies.” Ok, so maybe Nell wasn’t the most knowledgeable about Turian customs and positions in the Hierarchy but there was no need to talk to her like she was a child. The sneer in the way his mother said _‘suppose’_ made his plates itch too, like being a Ship Engineer was beneath any respectable Turian.

 

“We’ve had this conversation Mother. I like it here and I love my job.” Lazz cut in at the look of loathing on Nell’s face. He was so bored of this argument, just because it wasn’t what _‘she’_ wanted, it was invalid and below him.

 

“Doesn’t mean I can’t try and convince you to come to your senses.”  His mother hissed dismissively before remembering her original reason for turning up at his apartment. “And speaking of talking sense into you, a Human, really? It would be one thing and bad enough, if you were just blowing off steam with her but to move in together. You’re screaming to the galaxy that you’ve taken her as your mate. Don’t you care that you’re making us the laughing stock of Palaven?”

 

“Not really, no.” Lazz shrugged nonchalantly looking Nell in the eye and flaring his mandibles to try and make her smile. He very much doubted that Palaven cared that he was seeing a Human other than as idle gossip. The tales of Human colonies going missing and Commander Shepard’s exploits in Cerberus were likely to be far more interesting than the relationship of a Turian and a Human. Even if they were… well it was better than them talking about his fringe and speculating on what could have caused the damage or discussing his failures as a squad leader.   

 

“You won’t be so dismissive when she leaves you for another Human. Everyone knows Humans don’t bond the way we do, at least Asari have the decency to stay with their Turian mates for the mate’s lifetime. Can you say your Human will do the same?” She pointed out scornfully and he felt Nell stiffen beside him. _‘Your Human’_ like Nellwyn was some kind of pet. That was a low blow, trying to sow the seeds of doubt in such a callous way and insult Nell in the same breath. It wasn’t any of his mother’s business, after all plenty of Turians still entered into arranged marriages that never resulted in any lasting affection on either side.

 

“Asari live to about a thousand, our life span is nothing to them but Humans live the same amount of time. It’s unreasonable to tie them into a relationship that will make them miserable for their entire lives.” Lazz began to explain hurriedly before Nell cut him off.

 

“I know our divorce statistics are high and many of us choose not to mate for life but plenty of Humans stay married to one person for their entire lives. It just depends on the person and what they are looking for in a partner; also whether or not they can find that person.” Nell growled pulling his gaze to meet hers as she ran her hand down his mandible. Spirits she was pretty, especially when she was looking at him with those big affectionate Citadel sky blue eyes.

 

“How can you guarantee that the novelty won’t wear off and you won’t leave him broken hearted to pine? It’s not like he could take another mate even if we _could_ find a Turian woman willing to bond with him. He wouldn’t have even considered you if his fringe was intact.” The insult barely had time to sink in as Nell let out a very Turian like hiss, the warm blue flashing cold Biotic blue as her gaze shot to his mother.

 

“How could you say that? Any woman would be lucky to have him. How dare you make a comment like that?” She shouted angrily taking a step forwards, her body humming with barely supressed Biotic power. “And to answer your insanely offensive question; I can’t, but we could all be attacked by Reapers tomorrow and all die, so there’s that.”

 

Wait did she just…  “Don’t you dare put into Nell’s head that she’s a last resort. Spirits you’re unbelievable, I suggest you leave before I make you.” He snarled, letting his subvocals convey his rage. While it was true they had both heard that sentiment a few times from strangers, in hushed rude whisperings but he had never thought it would be voiced from his family.

 

“Alright that’s enough Cicetia. She’s his mate, we knew it the second we stepped foot in the apartment. We wanted to see how serious it was and now we have. We should leave before you somehow make this worse.” Kaesrius interjected, pulling his mother backwards as Lazz nuzzled Nell’s hair in an attempt to calm her. And if he was honest, calm himself too before he let them whimper of hurt claw its way out of his chest and embarrass him or grab his mother by the mandibles and throw her out.

 

“Yes, you really should leave.” Nell stated coldly her body stiff as a board in his arms. It had been a while since he had heard her sound that cold and dangerous.

_______________________

 

Nell sat curled up on Lazz’s lap contemplating how their morning had gone so wrong. For fucks sake, somehow that had gone worse than the conversation with her dad, which had ended with her just hanging up on him in the middle of a _‘do you know how many of my friends they killed’_ rant that had followed the _‘why can’t you just be normal’_ rant. Both were boring and annoying as hell.

 

She had no idea what to say or do to make Lazz feel better, Cicetia had said some really horrible things to him, to them both actually but she was more concerned about him. The bitch had said a lot of things to stir the worst of his insecurities back up. _‘I’m sorry your mother’s a bitch and I wish I could crush her like a mech’_ was probably not the right thing to say, though it might make him laugh. 

 

“You’re not a last resort to me, you know that right?” Lazz mumbled, burying his face in her hair and taking a deep breath. God was that what he was worried about? Silly Turian. A lot of things could have happened in their lives to prevent their meeting, they both knew that. It was the same with every relationship.

 

“And you’re not a novelty to me.” Nell replied, kissing his neck and snuggling closer against his warm hide. Actually maybe she should have crushed his mother or at least slammed her around the room a few times like a biotic ball. To outright say that your only son couldn’t find anyone to love him for his appearance, and that she was just using him to scratch some itch. No wonder he had so many self-esteem issues and had freaked out so much because she missed one breakfast date. “You know she’s not welcome in our home, right?”

 

“If I see her anytime in this cycle it will be too soon.” He growled. It was going to take a while to cheer him up, no Armax today, he was too distracted and might get hurt but maybe a movie night with Sam would help. They could tease and cajole him out thoughts of his mother and maybe end the day on at least a positive note.

 

“Kind of like your dad though. He wasn’t happy but at least he wasn’t behaving like a selfish hurtful child.” At least one of their parents had behaved like the aging adults they were. Yes, she would call Sam in an hour or so and tell him to bring take out tonight, maybe that blue steak stuff Lazz liked so much…

 

__________________

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Re-wrote this like 5 times. Reviews are appreciated. I would like to thank bioware for changing the appearance of the female Turian and messing with my story in a small way.


	14. The World Burns

Nell stood staring at the vid screen just outside her shop in shock, just like everyone else actually. Palaven and Earth were burning. The home worlds of the galaxy’s two largest militaries, not including the Krogan, were burning. The small part of her brain that wasn’t screaming in horror at what she was seeing, understood what a masterful stroke this duel attack was. Military power in the galaxy had just crashed to a screeching halt, this was a _nightmare_. It was finally happening, years of warnings and the horror was finally here… the Reapers… and not just the vanguard this time.

 

There was no way her father was going to survive this, maybe if he was well but he wasn’t. He had _just_ told her about the terminal cancer… the same one that had taken her mother; thought to have been caused by excessive eezo exposure, and god hadn’t that caused her a tone of guilt. God she had been supposed to go down a visit him next week and now he would be gone… she hadn’t even gotten to say good bye. He’d had a couple more months before he went to be with mum, plenty of time for goodbyes but now she’d never get the chance.

 

Oh _god_ , Nell thought suddenly with tears streaming down her face. If this attack had happened one week later she would have been trapped on the planet and Lazz would have been left on the Citadel alone thinking he had lost everyone he loved in one fell swoop. 

_________________________

 

“Oi, Lazz.” Sam called rushing into the engine room like he had a pack of Varren on his heels causing Lazz to jerk suddenly, slicing one of the cables with an un-gloved talon. Damn, those would need to be filed when he got home.

 

“What?!” He snapped annoyed; stupid fiddly wiring, damn thing had required the removal of his gloves. Now look what happened; he was going to have to rewire the whole Spirits damned thing all over again. Well, there went the last four-ish hours of work.

 

“You have to come and see it’s all over the news. Earth and Palaven have been attacked, it’s really bad.” Sam choked out in a rush, causing Lazz to stop fiddling with his ruined wiring and look at him in horror. His friend was death white, it was almost like his freckles and the skin tone Nell had described as olive, had vanished. He looked like he was going to be sick…

 

“What do you mean attacked?” Lazz demanded his tools clattering to the ground when he knocked them over in his haste to get to Sam.

 

“Just come.” Sam replied grabbing him by the arm roughly and dragging him out of the engine room.

 

Attacked was an understatement, Lazz thought as he came face on with a vid screen as they exited the Turian cruiser he had been working on. Decimated was closer to the mark. He felt his mandibles go slack as he watched the carnage on the screen, strangely mirrored side by side Palaven and Earth burned. The fires could be seen from space, making both worlds resemble volcanic wasteland planets, left and right the odd space craft exploded as they were hit by red beams of energy.

 

Spirits, he hoped his family had survived. Hopefully had somehow managed to get off planet, but he would settle for survived.

 

“Oh god Lazz, there you are.” He heard Nell call seconds before he saw her weave through the crowd of stunned engineers and soldiers before flinging herself at him. She was pale and shaking, her makeup destroyed by her tears.

 

“They’re here.” Nell whispered in a tiny voice as she buried her wet face into his neck.

 

“I know.” There was really nothing else he could say, nothing to make her feel better; nothing to make himself feel better either. Later, maybe, once they’d had time to process what was happening but right now all he could do was hold his mate close as he watched their world’s burn on screen.

_______________

 

Lazz nuzzled his nose against Nell’s hair with what he hoped was a comforting rumble and not the distressed keening that was still trying to claw its way up his throat. Spirits, it hurt to see her like this. The whole day was terrible and horrifying but seeing Nell like this was just the bow on the present. He felt like he should have realised how distraught she was sooner, the very fact that she had caught a Transit from her work to his, with her face paint in such a state should have tipped him off but it hadn’t.

 

He had been in shock, unable to do anything but watch his world burn. Tearing his eyes away from the screen and taking Nell and Sam home hadn’t even occurred to him until he had felt her knees give out. Well, that and Sam’s sudden need to eject the contents of his stomach had been a big tip off that his Humans were going into shock and needed to go somewhere safe.

 

Vomiting was entirely gross and Lazz still had trouble sometimes wrapping his head around the fact that it didn’t mean they were going to die.

 

Once Nell was calmer, he would need to call Sam to check on him. Honestly having them both on his couch where he knew they were safe and taken care of would have been so much better, but no, Sam had wanted the safety and quiet of his own place. Spirits, it was understandable but still annoying.

 

“Is Sam all right?” Nell croaked from his neck, her voice was thin, tired and distressingly dead.

 

“I don’t know, I hope so. I’ll call him in a little while and check.” Lazz replied pulling back to look at her, which was hard when she was still curled tightly into his neck. At least the shaking had stopped, and she hadn’t thrown up. Still it looked like Nell needed some sleep and a couple of those head pain tablets she took sometimes. Damn Reapers.

 

“No, you should go and check on him. Make sure he eats and goes to sleep if he won’t come here.” She argued, her voice becoming stubborn.

 

“I don’t want to leave you by yourself today.” He protested. Spirits, he didn’t want to leave her at all, not when she was like this. Not when their entire worlds had just imploded. She was safe and warm and his, his mate. Possibly the only family he had left, not that he was on speaking terms with his mother but that didn’t mean he wanted her dead. _But_ Sam was family too… kind of. 

 

“I’ll be fine. I’m here, I’m safe. I’ll just be lying down in our bed.” Nell stated pulling back to look at him. Her eye makeup was nearly gone now, what remained was just a wet smear of colours. Her eyes were red rimmed and Spirits she was still pale but in that red blotchy, liquid way that meant she was anything but _fine_. “Sam needs you too.”

 

“Fine but only after you’ve showered, got some food into you and I’ve tucked you into bed.” Lazz growled if he was going to have to leave her for any period of time today, he was not budging on this point. At least then he could go out knowing he’d at least taken care of his mate first. Mate first, friend second and everything else after, that was how he was going to get through this nightmare, Turian Hierarchy rules be damned.

_____________________

 

“How was he?” Nell asked when she felt the mattress beside her shift as Lazz sat on the side of the bed. There was the clink of metal clasps against talons as he began to get undressed. She had been unable to fall asleep at all in the two-ish hours Lazz had been gone. The pounding in her head and the vid screen replay loop running behind her eyes as well as every argument she’d ever had with her dad, every harsh word ever said and every time she had decided not to call, had done that. At least he’d been out of the apartment when her stomach had finally rebelled.  

 

“Not good. I’m pretty sure he’s sleeping now though.” He replied with a sad keen. Poor Sam, Nell thought reaching out to rub her hand down the back of his carapace. He was only a civilian, other than the standard crime on the Citadel he had never seen combat or war and now he was thrust into one that could end them all if they didn’t win. At least all his family was on the Citadel, having her friend worry about the fate of his family would have broken her heart and Lazz’s.

 

“We’ll take care of him.” She stated hoping that was going to be possible. God what use was military training if they couldn’t even protect one damned person. Well they wouldn’t be just protecting one person, this was a war to save their species but somehow it was always worse when you lost a civilian friend. They hadn’t signed up, didn’t know the risks, and didn’t actively put themselves in harm’s way. Lazz didn’t have many friends, losing the few he had would destroy him, especially with not knowing if his parents were alive or not.

 

“I hope we can.” Lazz muttered dejectedly, grabbing her hand and pressing it against his mandible before he stood up to remove the rest of his clothing before crawling into bed beside her. A game plan could wait until tomorrow, today just hurt too much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we're hitting cannon again, quite a time skip from the last chapter obviously. This chapter and the next were originally one but then they got split. I really wanted Nell to the one who fell apart despite all her military background, i hope it made sense to you guys. Not many chapters left, unless i keep splitting them. I am absolutely determined to finish this. 
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy.


	15. Absolutely Not

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the hectic life of war and how daily life changes.

The Galaxy had gone insane, in one horrible day the rug had been pulled out from under everyone and everything was just a senseless mess. The influx of refugees escaping from Earth, Palaven and surrounding Colonies was staggering. Civilians, wounded soldiers and damaged limping ships. It was madness. Fashion Passion had closed its doors within a week of the news; Issana had decided to do what she could for those who lost their homes.

 

It was just as well, Nell had been about to hand in her notice anyway. Her skills as a Gunnery Officer were far more useful than her desire to sell and wear fashionable clothing. There was something soothing about modding weaponry for sale to help the war, eventually there would be no choice but to bite the proverbial bullet and join it but for now just helping was enough. At least that was what she kept telling herself at night when the guilt started to itch…

 

Etarn had been more than willing to hire her, in any other circumstance he would have been jumping for joy at poaching her since he’d been trying since she got to the Citadel but like everyone else a sense of grim determination now swirled around him. It was a shame, he had been so cheerful; always telling weird stories and bragging about his _‘I’m Commander Shepard, and this is my favourite store on the Citadel’_ advert.

 

“When did you say the shipment of those Chakram rifles are coming in?” Etarn asked, coming into the backroom. Nell wanted to snap at him, say that it was the 5th time he’d asked today but looking at him she just couldn’t do it. Damn, he looked as tired as she felt. Poor guy, the patches under his eyes were practically black now and if she didn’t know better she’d say his fringe was wilting with exhaustion.

 

“1600 provided they don’t get picked up by C-Sec. Although considering the money you’re paying that smuggler he’d better pray he’s as good as he thinks he is.” Nell sighed turning back to her work. It was going to be a long few days getting those rifles modded to improve their overheating problem, even with her pulling a few all-nighters. If they weren’t the best on the market she probably wouldn’t even have bothered getting them in, but with the Reapers making terrifying Turian hybrid _things_ called Brutes… well the soldiers needed all the help they could get. God, that one picture she saw of the things had given her so many nightmares of it happening to Lazz. For three nights in a row last week he had woken to her screaming for him, the first night she had actually thrown up all over the floor like a drunken teenager. At least the nightmares had begun tapering off… finally. Maybe if she was really lucky they would stop all together.

 

“C-Sec won’t be a problem. They have more important things to worry about than cracking down on illegal weapons right now.” Etarn muttered shaking his head before giving a derisive little laugh. Well, wasn’t that the sad truth; between refugees fleeing colonies, riots, doomsayers and Cerberus propaganda, where the weaponry used against the Reapers came from was the least of C-Secs problems. Poor over-worked bastards.

 

“True.” She replied distractedly. One more screw and the clip extension would be on, then just the accuracy adjustment to compensate for the extra weight and this SMG would be ready to go and she could go home and maybe see Lazz. Not that many would notice the dip in accuracy since the damn things could barely hit an Elchor at any range but it was the principle of the thing damn it. God she hated SMGs.

_________________

 

Double shifts sucked ass, it felt like forever since he had seen Nell or spent any time with her aside from just falling into bed exhausted only to be woken up through the night with her whimpering but at least the ship was done. How that thing had limped into the docks was beyond him, numerous hull breaches, fried wiring, fucked up nav system but somehow it had survived whatever battle with half its crew and made it to safety. Spirits damned miracle for at least that much. Spirits he needed this break, this one freaking afternoon to do something enjoyable and blow off a little steam before he completely lost it.

 

_“… Have you heard?”_

_“They say the Reapers can’t find it…”_

_“… Sanctuary.”_

 

Hmm, he’d been hearing a few whispers like that over the last few days. A couple of the guys at work the other morning had been talking about perhaps sending their children and wives there, out of the way of battle. It might be something worth looking into, now that he might have a day or two of quiet before the next emergency. Nell’s nightmares were just getting quieter but despite her assurances he knew they were not much better; to say it worried him was a gross understatement.

 

At the moment, however, it was time to go and surprise her, Lazz reminded himself as he headed towards Rodam Expeditions. It was still a bit strange, Nell not working at Issana’s; twice he had found himself standing in front of the closed store purely out of habit. A tiny piece of their lives already changed by the war, Spirits he knew it had only been a month since he stood and watched as their worlds burned but it already felt so much longer than that.

 

“Hey Etarn.” Lazz greeted as he walked through the store, weaving his way through the throng of wrung out looking customers. “Is Nell out back?” He asked as Etarn nodded his head in greeting, already half way to opening the door.

 

Nell sat hunched over in her chair in a way that looked extremely uncomfortable to him, one knee folded between herself and the bench as she leant over it, carefully screwing one mod or another in with a look of blank concentration. How she worked like that he would never understand and it made his legs hurt just looking at her. Not wanting to get yelled at for startling the Spirits out of her, Lazz walked into her peripheral vision just out of arms reach.

 

“Hey Nell, need a break?” He greeted her, purring a little as he crouched down to eye level. She looked tired, stressed and oddly wonderful.   

 

“Soon as I finish this Etarn is letting me go home. The big shipment is coming in this afternoon, so it’s probably double shifts starting tomorrow.” Nell explained distractedly as she finished whatever it was she was doing before turning to him and smiling warmly. “I missed you.” She mumbled leaning forwards to press her forehead against his with a little hum.

 

“I missed you too. I’ll get out of your fringe while you finish but then you and I are going to do something fun this afternoon.” Lazz chuckled running his talons gently through her hair, she smelt of shampoo, that perfume stuff she favoured, gun oil and him. Spirits he didn’t know what he’d do if he lost her to this war…

____________________

 

This was a _terrible_ idea, Nell thought as she picked herself off the hard ground where she’d landed. Lazz rushed to her side completely heedless of the simulated enemies around them, there was a terrified screech in his subvocals that she could practically feel in her bones, causing a weirdly sick feeling in her stomach and that was _not_ good. Yep, agreeing to go to Armax had been a terrible idea. Tired, distracted and in combat was a terrible combination, but at least this was only a simulation and her shields had just been knocked out. Not that any commander in their right mind would send an operative, who had just completed three all-nighters, on any kind of combat mission. Not that she had told Lazz what she did when he was on double shifts… probably not the best plan but it wasn’t like she could sleep well anyway.

 

_God damn it._

 

“I’m fine, Lazz.” She muttered angrily at her own stupidity as she pulled them both behind cover before shooting the mech that shot her with a biotic blast, taking its head clean off.

 

“You’re _not_ fine.” Lazz snarled, dropping his weapon and checking her over frantically with his hands. God, if he ever flipped like this and dropped his weapon like this in combat she was going to hit him with it, which was odd because he had never done it before... actually the first time she had been blasted ass over head he had laughed his plated ass off at her. Of course he had stopped laughing when she had torn YMIR mech to scrap metal… Ah, good times.

 

“I _am_ fine. I’ve been hit before in this dumb game and you’ve never flipped out like this before, what the _fuck_ is going on?” She screeched pushing his hands away. Damn him, he could get himself killed doing shit like this, Nell grumbled to herself as she picked up his weapon and shoved it roughly at him.

 

“We’re in the middle of a Spirits damned war now, that’s what changed.” He growled sharply, his subvocals trilling out in anxiety as he took the weapon grudgingly. …Right because she hadn’t, in fact, noticed…

 

“That doesn’t change the fact that this…” She began gesturing with her weapon to their surroundings, “…is a game. You know the thing we do for _fun_.” Or _did_ for fun, Nell amended silently.

 

“Luckily for you it _is_ just a game, or you’d be right back in the hospital right now or Spirits damned dead. What in the hell were you thinking spacing out like that!” Lazz yelled, looking up and hastily pushing a button on his Omni-tool and sending an arching blast of electricity past her head, so close she could hear the snap and crackle, and feel her hair rise against the static. Behind her there was the pop and buzz of a mech overloading and the dull thud of a mini explosion. Well shit, that one had gotten a bit close.

 

“I was thinking, the both of us had been working our asses off and we were here to have fun, that if I got hit you’d just laugh at me like you always do. Like that time I got blasted ass over head by a wayward rocket from that YMIR mech and you laughed so hard I thought your damned mandibles were going to fall off! Remember, that.” Nell retorted, freezing three virtual Krogan in a Singularity before shooting them. No way in freaking hell would that have killed a real Krogan… but whatever.

 

“That, was before we both lost our families and home worlds to the Reapers.” He snapped, sending a powerful incinerate towards a Varren charging up from their three o’clock. The conversation seemed to pause for a moment as she ducked out from behind cover to shoot at a group of Mechs weaving their way towards the position she and Lazz were attempting to hold. “I can’t do it Nell, not if anything happens to you.” Lazz continued quietly from beside her, barely audible over the gunfire.

 

“Don’t even think of trying to send me to Sanctuary.” Nell snarled. If he thought she hadn’t noticed the way his attention wandered whenever he heard some whispered conversation about that place, he was an idiot. “Don’t even think for a second about suggesting it, or you’ll be sleeping on the couch from now until the start of the next cycle.” 

 

“Please, it’s supposed to be safe and a lot of the other engineers are talking about sending their families over. I just need you to be safe. Please.” Lazz begged, making frantic, nervous gestures with his gun. God, if she wasn’t so pissed, Nell was sure she would have laughed; _Safe_ , what a fucking joke. As if anywhere in this damned Galaxy was safe from the Reapers, they probably had some kind of organic life detector built into their weird squid bodies. OK so maybe once they had exterminated them down to the last few thousand they might, _might_ , leave but really, fuck that.

 

“Absolutely fucking not! Are you kidding me? I am _not_ leaving.” Nell shouted, pulling out from behind cover to take out some of her anger on an enemy. Maybe the Turians were onto something when they started up the sparring rings; take out grudges and anger on the one who caused them in a controlled environment, only Lazz would never go for it, even without the war on.

 

“Please Nell. You wake up at least three times a week screaming from nightmares you won’t share with me. You barely sleep or eat. Etarn told me you’ve pulled all-nighters you didn’t need to, worked longer hours than necessary. You’re not coping and that scares me worse than anything. I just need you to be safe, _please_ …” He pleaded, sending another arch of electricity from his Omni-tool towards a hazy shimmer edging around a large block of concrete. There was a yelp and a brown skinned Salarian appeared, falling to the ground with a buzz before vanishing.

 

Nope, that was it. “You want to know what I have nightmares about! The Reapers turning _you_ into one of those things! And you are _not_ shipping me off to some death trap planet, god knows where, while it happens. I am not going to Sanctuary and that’s _final_.” Nell ground out darkly, shoving her gun at him and stalking off. She could feel her biotics reacting to her anger and slipping from her control which meant she needed a massive time out and some space to calm down and get her head in order.

_____________________

 

This was the longest she hadn’t spoken to him, Lazz lamented as he watched the closed door to their bedroom from his seat on the couch. It made his plates itch. She’d never been so angry at him before; shut him out like this with a closed door and hours of horrible deafening itchy silence. All he wanted to do was keep her safe. Maybe he just hadn’t explained himself properly; after all, that situation wasn’t how he had originally intended to bring the subject up. 

 

The problem was… he had no idea how to broach the topic with her again… and she was so against it but it wasn’t something he felt he could just let go. Was he supposed to knock on the door and ask her to talk? To beg her to hear him out and try to convince her he only wanted what was best for her, to keep her safe and make sure she survived this Spirits awful war. Spirits, if he lost her… even the thought of it pulled a low wailing keen from his chest.

 

“Lazz?” Nell’s quiet voice startled him out of his thoughts with a jerk. Spirits he hated it when she did that, just turned up without making a sound.

 

“Nell. Thank the Spirits. I’m sorry for flipping out so bad during the match, that wasn’t how I wanted to bring Sanctuary up.” He began quickly before she could do more than take a step into the lounge room.

 

“I know but you need to understand. I am _never_ going to Sanctuary.” She stated, padding carefully into the room and sitting on the arm rest of the couch beside him. His poor beautiful mate still looked so tired, had since he’d picked her up from work but now her face had lost the flush of anger and exertion of a few hours ago and was now back to being pale, dark circles under her vivid blue eyes. This, this was why he wanted her to go, to be safe and he was in no way ready to back down and he certainly wasn’t going to apologise.

 

“Why? Nell I don’t understand, you’re a mess. I need you to be safe; I can’t do this if I lose you.” Lazz began, trying to explain and knowing he was already making a mess of it. He watched as her brows pulled together in a scowl.

 

“What and you think I can?” Nell demanded her voice and eyes sapphire hard in anger for a moment before she shook her head. “Lazz this is a galactic scale war, nowhere will be safe.” Her voice was softer now but only marginally so.

 

“Nellwyn, dearest.” He began pulling her down to sit with him on the couch. This was hard to say, but it was something he’d thought about near constantly since the joint attack. “You’re not a Turian; you aren’t bound to me for the rest of your life. If I die in this war, you will eventually be able to move on. I know that, I _want_ that for you. More than anything I want you to survive this and live your life, buy that shop you want and grow old. Sanctuary will be safe. Please?” Once, this fact had been a niggling fear, especially in the early days of courting her. Humans didn’t mate for life, at least not the same way Turians did. _Now_ it was a blessing.

 

He watched her face soften and tears swim in her eyes, though there was a tinge of anger in there too, indignation. She ran her hand a few times down his mandible, her soft fingers dancing over his plating in a way that mildly tickled as she searched for a way to say what was on her mind.

 

“Even if that place wasn’t the worst idea ever, and it is, the more people who go there the larger target it becomes for the Reapers. And they _will_ find it. I refuse to sit out the war in a bunker crammed with civilians pretending I don’t know that.” Nell began, explaining. Spirits how he wanted to reassure her but he could see her point damn it. “Lazz I’m a soldier, ok so I’m not coping right now, but I am. I feel guilty as hell that we’re not on the front lines protecting colonies from these monsters, I wake up afraid that they’ve killed you and turned you into one of those things, and I know that worries you but I am absolutely not going. I am not spending what could be our remaining time together separated hiding god knows where, alone.” It physically hurt to hear her talk in such a way.  

 

“But…” He began before she cut him off with a hand on his mandible.

 

“No. Now please let it go.” Nell expressed with finality.

 

________________

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did anyone else play ME3 hear about Sanctuary and think "wow that is an awful idea" also all my money was on "it's a trap" unfortunately no one would bet against me, this chapter is dedicated to this thought. So writing this kind of fight was a challenge, i tried to keep it as realistic as possible and i hope i did it justice.


	16. Spot Comes to Visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cerberus try to take the Citadel

The distant patter of assault rifles was so dull and familiar when it began that it barely penetrated Nell’s thoughts, it had been an hour since her old crew had left her to return to the Trafalgar and she had been sitting in her usual Café seat mulling over the news, completely zoned out and lost in thought. It wasn’t until the first vibrations of a massive explosion rocked the Zakera Ward that Nell finally registered what was happening, at the same moment the alarms, just as slow on the uptake began to shriek and flash red; the Citadel was under attack.

All at once, with barely a moment’s pause, it seemed like hell broke loose when the windows to the outside exploded inwards as a Kodiak crashed into the ward, bouncing twice before coming to an ear bleeding screeching halt. If her body hadn’t been so wired to combat that it immediately dived to the floor under the table, Nell knew she would have been caught in the shrapnel as shattered glass rained down all around with metallic clinks. She groped for a pistol that wasn’t there and cursed the Citadel’s anti-weapons law in a time of war.

Ducking her head tentatively around the edge of her table, Nell peered towards the fiery wreckage just in time to see the door of the Kodiak being blasted out and two figures that were not in the comforting Citadel blue and black but white and yellow jump out, fully armed. There was too much white on their uniforms for them to be Eclipse raiders, even though she couldn’t quite see the logo on their uniforms from this far away.

If not Eclipse, who? Nell thought as she watched them. Damn it, she needed a ranged weapon and fast. Luckily there was only three so far but more would come…

There was a movement behind her, scraping on glass fragments and a rush of wind as a body ducked in next to her with a flash of mottled Alliance blue. Nell looked back, surveying the interior of the café, tables and chairs were upturned with Civilians all nursing various degrees of glass cuts, people, clearly soldiers on leave were shushing them and dragging the worst of the injured behind cover where others were beginning to scan them with Omni-tools. Fuck… they were going to need medical supplies too.

“Those are Cerberus troops.” The strange Alliance soldier next her commented in disgust.

“Fantastic.” Nell growled out derisively turning her attention back to the enemy. Just what they needed, wasn’t it enough they were reported to have attacked the Mars archives within hours of Earth being under siege. One of them was clearly using his or her comms while the others fanned out a few meters in surveillance, pointing their weapons at people huddled in the hallway. Ok so they weren’t going to shoot those who didn’t resist, but would they attack those who ran or were in uniform? Regardless there was no way in hell this coup of the Citadel could be allowed to go un-resisted.

“We need to get their weapons and protect the Civilians.” Came a flanged voice to her left as a Turian ducked up to a table just in her peripheral vision.

“Rodam Expeditions is 20 meters on our 3; we should try and get as many people as we can there. The windows are triple glazed bullet proof with blast doors, we can arm up there and -” Nell began before a secondary Kodiak crashed through another window just on her 9 causing all the Civilians in the shop to scream out in shock and the ones in the hallway to flee in panic. As one the two of the three Cerberus troops turned towards their hiding place and opened fire while the other opened fire upon the people in the passage, cutting them down in a hail of bullets.

Gathering her biotics Nell ducked out and caught the centre opponent, propelling him with as much power as she could into the one opening fire at innocents and sending them flying across the hallway and into the back wall with a forceful crash, just missing sending them out the window by a mere meter. The Turian soldier leapt out from behind his table and bolted towards the remaining Cerberus member tackling him at full force and using his Omni-blade to stab though his armour.

The soldier beside her and one other further back in the store rushed past her in the commotion and dashed towards the bodies of the soldiers Nell had just broken. They skidded to a halt and knelt down to gather as many weapons as they could while the new enemy troops came to their senses enough to blast the doors off the new Kodiak. As they stumbled out of the cruiser they were quickly mowed down by the Turian and his newly acquired assault rifle. Bastards.

“We need to move, before more come.” Nell called out, heading over to the nearest civilian the hoisting their arm around her shoulder. This was going to be the longest 20 meter walk in history.

_____________________

When the first docked Cruiser detonated, taking out at least three lesser ships, a number of engineers and leaving a meteor sized crater of smouldering fire in the docking bay, Lazz knew that they were under attack, although how the enemy whoever it was, had got in was a question for another time. They needed to act quickly before they were completely overrun.

“What the fuck happened?” Sam cried staring at the wreckage in horror as the alarms began to screech and flash.

“The Citadel is under attack. Quick, get to the controls and release the docking restraints on all the vessels. We need them out of here now.” Lazz urged pivoting and dashing towards the blast doors on the other end of the bay, not waiting for an answer. They needed to get the ships out of dock before more exploded and took the wards above and below with them and bar the blast doors before any enemy troops got in.

 All at once there was panic, as if his voice had set the quiet stunned silence in motion. All around him as he ran people, mostly Turians, were pulling down storage crates, knocking over trollies and piling them up into useable cover. Loitering personnel and soldiers returning from shore leave dashed though ship doors and drive cores were fired up. Within seconds a few of the smaller crafts had hurtled out of the docking bay and the sound of gun fire was everywhere. So was the screaming… 

Lazz was about half way to the blast door when he was halted by an unfortunately familiar noise; heavy hulking steps and the grinding of gears. An Atlas, white and yellow in colour came stomping around the corner followed by a small platoon of enemy soldiers in matching white and yellow. He knew that mark, on the front of the Atlas the proudly emblazoned insignia of the enemy was displayed, Cerberus.

You have got to be kidding me, Lazz thought momentarily stunned before diving behind some hastily erected cover. How the fuck did they even get an Atlas in? Why the hell were they even attacking? And where the hell was C-Sec? He wondered, readying his Omni-tool and activating his drone.

________________

When the blast doors to Rodam Expeditions closed a sigh of relief swept through the store; for the moment they were safe. It had been a hard walk, carrying so many injured and pulling in stragglers who just wanted to huddle in the hallways and shop fronts, all while holding off any troops that propelled themselves through the broken windows and into the ward. Two more Kodiaks had crash landed, scraping noisily against the metal passage, to spill their invaders. The worst one had carried some strange biotic melee user, acrobatic and deadly; it had killed 5 members of their little group, and cut up half a dozen more before they managed to take it down.

“Nell, I’m glad you’re safe.” Etarn said, placing a hand on her shoulder briefly before stepping back to survey the newcomers. A few other groups had obviously had the same idea.

“Thanks.” Nell breathed, dumping herself and her companion on the ground. “We need weapons and armour. They can’t be allowed to take the Citadel.” She explained, pulling up her Omni-tool. If they had hit Zakera this hard the Docks would be far worse off.

_~Buzz~ Oh thank the Spirits you’re all right,_ Lazz’s voice hissed through, the frequency static and unstable. He didn’t sound injured, just out of breath and a bit frantic, his vocals humming with relief.

“Yeah, Zakera is being overrun. We’ve managed to pick up a few survivors on our way to Rodam’s and now we’re armouring up. How’s it looking on your end? Are you and Sam ok?” Nell asked after giving him a quick rundown.

_We’re completely under siege, they’ve got Atlas’s but we’ve managed to get most of the ships out and close one of the doors. Sam and I are fine. Once we get the last blast doors closed we’ll have less to deal with._ There was a huge crashing boom in the background of his comms link, before it cut out into static for a moment.

“Lazz, Lazz. Come in.” Nell called, anxiously, fear curling in her gut before the static cleared.

_Still here, the last Atlas just got taken out; unfortunately it took out the fighter as well._ Lazz chimed through the static, an angry shrill in his subvocals. _There, the last door is closed, that should hold most of them out for a while._

“What about weapons?” She asked, knowing it was impossible for her to get to him or bring them enough supplies. Every dock Cerberus won meant more men and weaponry they could bring onto the Citadel.

_Got plenty, we’ve been pulling them off the ships that can’t leave dock. We’re fine for a siege now, that door will buy us enough time to get some defences built._ Lazz explained briefly and through his link she could hear orders being given, the whirl of welders and the screech of metal against metal.

“Stay safe. I love you.” There was really nothing else that could be said. All she could do was hope they would be safe, but at least if they got control of Zakera they could stall any reinforcements coming down from the upper levels.

_I love you too. Keep in contact as much as possible._ He replied before cutting his link.

“If we can get to the elevators we can sabotage them, keep troops from heading down to the docks.” One of the Marines, who had clearly been listening to her conversation, said clipping on his gauntlets. “We’ll have the blow them and worry about the repairs later. Holding the stairs will be difficult enough without having to worry about the elevators being brought back online.”

“What about the skycar terminals. There are at least two of those on this ward, not to mention all the windows?” Another chimed in, affixing her helmet.

“If we can take the C-Sec substation around the corner back from Cerberus, I can close the blast shields on the windows.” An Asari in in a red dress that did nothing for her shade of purple explained, pulling up a map of the ward on her Omni-tool.

“Ok, we gear up and take the C-Sec substation; most of the Cerberus on this floor will head there first. After we’ve taken it we’ll split off into two teams, one will hold that position and the other, larger one will head towards the stairs, clearing the ward as they go and taking out the Skycars and Elevators. Any questions?” A large dark brown Turian, who had already been in the store when they arrived, ordered fastening his weapons onto his back. Nell recognised him, Major C of the Second Battalion; they had come in on a Cruiser yesterday for supplies and seeking recruits for the Crucible Device the Alliance was reportedly building.

 “What about the Civilians?” Another Marine asked gesturing around them. The store was filled with them, mostly Human with a few Quarians, Salarians and Volus nursing wounds and suit punctures of varying degrees.

“Those doors can hold out until you get this ward under control.” Etarn clarified, coming out from the back room with a few Firestorms in his arms. “I rebuilt them to withstand another Geth attack.”

“All right; everyone who can hold a weapon gear up, we leave in 5 minutes.” The Major yelled.

___________________

This had to be how Shepard felt on Elysium; Lazz thought both annoyed and bored out of his brain, as he welded a jerry rigged turret together. He could put these things together in his sleep; they were part of Turian Engineer training and he’d made scores before, in fact that was basically what was happening…Turian Engineering 101 all over again. The remaining fighter ships, the ones that were too damaged to leave dry-dock had been pulled back against the far wall and boxed in, guns pointing out towards the inner Citadel. Now and then one would fire, taking out a Cerberus Kodiak before it could land but for the most part it felt as if they were forgotten and yet a looming niggling worked down his spine. Silence from the enemy was very bad.

He’d heard nothing from Nell in over an hour, just a quick text about their plans to hit the C-Sec outpost on their ward. It was worrying and he was damned annoyed he couldn’t be there to watch her 6. He knew she would contact him once they had succeeded or had to fall back and regroup. All he could do was hope and pray she would be ok.

“Any word from Nell?” Sam asked carrying over a box of explosive shells.

“Nothing yet. Taking out an outpost, even a minor one takes a while.” Lazz growled, just barely managing to rein his anxiety in as his Omni-tool chimed quietly.

_~Buzz~ Lazz are you there?_ Nell’s static voice came through when he accepted the call with relief.

“Hey, speak of the devil.” Sam commented laughing.

_Hey Sam. How’s it going?_ She asked, sounding relieved.

“Everything’s quiet, boring even.” Lazz commented before Sam could answer her. “How’s everything on your end?”

_That’s not a good sign._ Nell growled giving voice to the unease itching his plates. _Fine, few dead, few wounded. We have control of the C-Sec panel and the blast shields are closed, they’ll have to blow them open but that will take a while and will limit their access points._

“Any idea how these bastards got in?” He asked loading the shells Sam had brought over into the Turret; obviously it hadn’t been through the _now_ destroyed relay in the Presidium Square.

_So far, looks like it was an inside job._ She snarled with disgust though his link. _We found a few C-Sec grunts helping the Cerberus troops, a lot of the dead officers had been shot in the back. They are currently being questioned by Major Atheros, I’d say poor bastards but the traitors deserve it._

Lazz snorted with disgust, figures. That explained the failure of the early warning system and how they got heavy weaponry onto the station, not to mention all the personnel. There was only so much the Mercenary groups could sneak past customs, even when everyone was scrambling during war time and Refugees were swarming in. “They’ll be going after C-Sec HQ then?”

_From what we’ve heard from one of the emergency channels Cerberus is hitting them in force, the survivors are trying to hold it. Heavy resistance is being formed on all wards but the Atlas’s have us at the disadvantage, and they have some kind of biotic that’s fast, agile and uses an Omni-blade, watch out for those._ Nell informed him in a clipped tone. Damn bastards might actually pull this stunt off if they got control of HQ and enough docking bays. _Anyway, the Major is back, looks like we’re heading out. I’ll try to check in again in an hour or so. Stay safe, love you._

“Love you too.” He replied just before the link closed with a click.

“What does she mean they want HQ, why would they do this?” Sam asked sounding stressed. Sometimes it was still easy to forget that Humans had actual Civilians, with no tactical knowledge or weapon skills.

“If they get HQ they’ll have control of all communication, vid feeds and defences. If they get the docking bays they’ll be able to bring however many troops they need into the Citadel, while preventing ours from landing. At the moment it looks like they just have what they were able to smuggle in.” Lazz explained calmly, getting up and heading over to the next Turret position.

“So they’ll be coming back here?” He queried, sounding just as afraid as he smelt.

“Most likely, though if I was them I would hit the low personnel docks first, they’ll have less resistance.” Lazz continued to explain, knowing he was doing nothing to assuage his friend’s fears. There was going to be a massive amount of casualties before help arrived, if it even did.

__________________________

Lazz knew the moment C-Sec Headquarters fell because two things happened, everyone’s commlinks cut out with a sharp static buzz and the blast doors to the bay were over ridden, turning from comforting red to unwelcome green an instant before swishing open.

Cerberus troops swarmed in like husks, followed by 6 hulking Atlas’s at each end of the bay. Thank the Spirits they had been given time to set up defences, but even now it was going to be hard held. Spirits he hoped they had prepared enough to hold out.

_______________________

All at once all the blast shields on Zakera went up and the headache inducing alarms were disarmed, out the windows Nell could see scorch marks littering the arms of the Citadel, here and there streams of gunfire could  be seen, Skycars in high speed chases with Kodiaks and fiery explosions littering the wards directly across from them.

In that same moment a squadron of Cerberus troops propelled through the now open windows and flanked her group that was hunkered down just outside the stairwell. They were beset from both sides now; the troops already entrenched in the stairwell using the commotion to surge forward. 

“There are too many of them.” One of the Asari called picking up one of the unused Firestorms.

“I vote we try to cave in the stairwell before they start coming down the elevator shafts from one of the upper floors.” A Marine cried, taking a glancing hit in her shoulder that knocked out her shields.

“Agreed.” Nell yelled, as she caught two of the flanking Cerberus in a Singularity before warping another.

Everyone in the squadron pulled back and prepared to retreat as the Asari levelled her Firestorm and took aim at the advancing group on the stairs, firing at the same time two others threw grenades. The shockwave sent everyone, Aggressors and Resistance alike sprawling back in limp heaps. One of the steel panels in the ceiling screamed and tore under the blast pressure, buckling down to the floor and bringing a News station with it. It wasn’t a very good cave in but it would slow them down. The repair bills for this adventure were going to be Geth Invasion levels at this rate.

_________________________

Lazz took out the last Mech in his little corner of the hanger and slid down to the ground exhausted. A few of his shrapnel wounds and glancing hits leaked a slow blue trails over his gear and dripped onto the metal flooring. Finally it was over. Ten hours, ten long freaking hours, the siege had lasted before without warning before the Cerberus troops had suddenly disappeared, leaving nothing but a handful of Mechs to cover their escape.

Under control fired raged here and there amongst the cratered wreckage of destroyed Turrets, Fighter ships and crashed Kodiaks. The moaning of wounded was all around, an echo to the semi-toxic smoke burning his eyes. Only one or two dead that he could see at a quick glance thank the Spirits.

Communications had been restored and all over the Citadel there were reports of Cerberus fleeing, vanishing as quickly as they had come into the numerous tunnels and vents often used by the Keepers. No news from Nell yet, but he had only just finished clearing out the trash himself. Just a quick rest, a chance to catch his breath and then, then he would go and look for her…

__________________________

 

It was the sensation of being petted, soft fingers stroking his fringe that first sunk their way through his hazy brain; the next thing that began to register the hard pillow under his head and the scents of Nell’s blood and gore, dirt and flame. It jerked him into sudden wakefulness, the fingers shifting to gently hold his shoulders down with a quiet shush.

“It’s all right Lazz, you’re safe.” Nell’s voice sounded weary and a little watery even to his foggy brain.

“Why do I smell your blood?” Lazz asked, his voice coming out hoarse and his throat very dry, as he adjusted his position so he could look at her. Her armour was caked in dust and grime, scorch marks and dints peppered the surface making it appear as old and battle scarred as a museum piece. Her hair was falling out of its horsetail in places and there was bruise in full bloom on her cheekbone.

“It’s fine, just a graze and I’ve already medi-gelled it.” She said dismissively, handing him a nearby water bottle. He was about to ask just how _‘fine’_ that wound really was when her brows furrowed “What I want to know is why you decided to take a nap on the floor in your own blood?”

Oh that… “I was sleepy.” He retorted half-heartedly, taking a huge gulp of water and trying to sit up. Oh that hurt, damn it he’d check her would later instead.

“Uhuh, well next time find a bed.” Nell replied, helping him shift before dropping her head on his shoulder and falling silent.

“A bed would be nice.” Lazz acknowledged, pressing his mandible against her hair with a rumble in his chest. 

__________________________

The Citadel was a mess and the bubble of illusionary safety had been thoroughly burst. The next week had been spent in a flurry of activity. So many had died, and for what, one stupid man’s frustration with a slow process. Rumour was Udina had organised a coup and had employed Cerberus to pull it off. Bastard. The Human race was going to be reaping the repercussions of this disaster for decades, if we survived that long as a species that was.

There was a mass exodus to Sanctuary, the Citadel no longer being seen as secure. Whispers were, if Cerberus could nearly take it, what hope did it have against the Reapers. Sam had already sent off his mother and sister, his father’s injury while holding down a C-Sec out post on the presidium, hitting them all hard. Another fight with Lazz about her going also had ensured.

“Lazz?” Nell called from the bathroom as she was getting ready to hop in the shower before heading to work. One good thing that could be said for the bubble burst was that all the fence sitters had picked a side now; enlistment across species had tripled in those who had decided to stay. She felt it was time for them to get off the fence now too, aiding the war effort from the back lines was now just as dangerous, if not more so than fighting from the front.

“Yeah?” Lazz replied entering the bathroom.

“I was thinking…” She began before he cut off with a chuckle and a mutter about how that was dangerous. “I’ve been thinking…” Nell began again with a shake of her head. “Our talents are wasted here.”

“Of course they are; Sam has already agreed to head to the Crucible, thank the Spirits, and you know they’ve approached me. But Nell, you know I want you to be safe.” He began, coming over and running his bare talons though her hair.

“Lazz, we’ve been over this. I’m not going and nowhere is safe. It was bad enough that we got caught on different Wards of the Citadel during the Coup. Where you go, I go and I was thinking you should take that job along with Sam.” Nell explained leaning into his touch.

“What will you be doing?” Lazz asked pulling her into his arms. She knew he hated this, that if he could make her go be safe while he went to fight and die he would but she wasn’t going to allow it. The last few days she had spent contacting the people she had met in the invasion and sorting together their options. Helping with some miracle Prothean death ray seemed like a good compromise between the front lines and the back. The Council was now funnelling what spare resources they had into the project after Shepard had once again saved their collective asses.   

“I’ve already messaged Major Atheros about our options. He’s willing to get me a job in security as a Gunnery Officer, they need more biotics on the team and my skill with weapons modification is something he was impressed with.” She explained. God she could have kissed that Turian, he had been perfectly eager to accept her unwillingness to leave her mate and more than happy to pull as many strings as possible to acquire not only her mate’s skill set but her own.

“You’re sure?” He questioned, a resigned tone edging its way into his subvocals.

“Yes.” Nell insisted pulling his forehead to hers, happy that he hadn’t posed much opposition to her plan.

“Right, well Sam leaves the day after tomorrow. I’ll organise my transfer paperwork and give it to you to send over, you organise yours, and we start packing tonight, I guess.” Lazz said, his eyes scanning the bathroom dejectedly as he squeezed her tightly. Damn, she was going to miss their home.

_____________________

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did anyone else ever notice how many dead Asari there were on the Presidium? The first time i played it, i got really upset because i thought Liara's dad died.


End file.
